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AIBU?

Do you find this offensive?

610 replies

Besswess88 · 28/11/2020 09:09

Someone posted this in a group I am in, and I find it really offensive AIBU?!

Do you find this offensive?
OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

2167 votes. Final results.

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You are being unreasonable
80%
You are NOT being unreasonable
20%
AliceMck · 30/11/2020 00:18

@Besswess88

Because it’s so smutty and it absolutely objectifies women.

Maybe it hits a raw nerve with me particularly because I have large boobs and have had to put up with shit like this (comments) my entire adult (and teenage) life.

I have huge boobs, HH, Blonde and dealt with jokes my entire life but I still think its funny. The world is turning into one very miserable place with everyone constantly being offended by any form of humour. Yes its tacky but most humour is.
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VenusTiger · 30/11/2020 00:19

Oh and please don't watch ANY Carry On films please.

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Quaagars · 30/11/2020 00:21

Oh and please don't watch ANY Carry On films please

Or On The Buses

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NiceGerbil · 30/11/2020 00:25

The attempts on here to explain the joke away are funny, even though the card isn't.

I enjoyed the poster who said maybe it was a post modern ironic image supposed to challenge stereotypes Grin

And this
'
The man is looking uncomfortably at a woman’s boobs. He’s not saying or actually doing anything suggestive, he’s not doing anything to the woman. '

I've looked at this sodding shit picture about 6 times now. If there is any way the bloke is not reaching for her boobs while she looks the other way, then I dunno. Maybe others have a 3D version or something because he is definitely going for her tits. That is the whole joke! Jesus I grew up with Benny hill and Cupid stunt and Sam fox on page 3 and whatnot.

Arguing over sexism/ offence etc is one thing but to pretend that women are misinterpreting this incredibly basic humour which was ubiquitous in the 60s-80s is just dishonest.

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NiceGerbil · 30/11/2020 00:35

'I have huge boobs, HH, Blonde and dealt with jokes my entire life but I still think its funny. '

Good for you! Other women react differently to it all. I mean I told the story about my friend (who developed early and was blonde) and the bus driver upthread where he said he'd let her off her fare if he could have a feel. She laughed about it, we all did. But we were 14. Looking back. It wasn't ok. Why is it ok? Boys will be boys?

'The world is turning into one very miserable place with everyone constantly being offended by any form of humour.'

I dunno. I can get my without jokes about p*kis and des and p**fters. (Will that get me deleted). I mean I don't miss them at all.

I remember being a little girl and watching TV and there'd be sketches like. Attractive girl walking past a bunch of builders. Wind blows her skirt up. They all go phwoar and laugh etc. She runs off embarrassed.

In the late 70s women's clothes unexpectedly falling off and then being unexpectedly exposed to a group of ogling men was quite a standard, I think?

I didn't find it funny when I was a little girl. It made me uncomfortable.

I accept that people found it funny then and miss that sort of thing.

What I don't understand is the insistence that women and girls who don't like it are wrong. The lack of empathy.

I like it but I can understand why you don't.

That's not tricky, surely.

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TheLittleDogLaughed · 30/11/2020 01:13

It’s sexist AND not funny.

Fair enough to say it is ‘of its time’ but that doesn’t mean we have to look at it now.

I am amazed how unenlightened to sexism many of these reactions have been.

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RAOK · 30/11/2020 01:22

I don’t find it funny but I’m not offended.

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Yellownotblue · 30/11/2020 01:51

Freedom of speech carries its own intrinsic punishment: people are judged on what they say.

You are perfectly entitled to conclude that the person who posted that joke is someone that you don’t want to associate with and that you don’t respect. You yourself also have freedom of speech and freedom of conscience, and you are perfectly entitled to be offended by this joke, and to say so.

FWIW I think the cartoon is sexist, and would judge anyone posting it as sexist.

I also think it’s not funny at all. I like a good joke, and that cartoon isn’t it. It is formulaic, has no rhythm and no punchline. I remember seeing these postcards as a child, and thinking they were funny because they were risqué. Until the age of around 8 or so. Then I thought they were cringey, and still do.

I generally subscribe to the school of thought that it’s fine to make offensive comedy, as there are often multiple levels, and offence can help people reflect on things more broadly. But it has to be funny. This postcard isn’t. I would judge anyone finding this funny as being immature or slow witted.

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HerselfIndoors · 30/11/2020 07:59

Although I strongly agreed it's offensive, that doesn't mean that a) I'm personally upset (though I have sympathy with anyone who is) or that b) I think it should be banned. That's not what "offensive" means IMO. I think it shouldn't be a thing and I wish it wasn't, but that's different. Banning things brings a whole can of worms with it and should only be for the most extreme stuff.

I wonder if some people these days think that as soon as something is deemed "offensive" by anyone, that means it should be banned?

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ginghamtablecloths · 30/11/2020 08:16

This sort of thing passed for humour in the old days OP and we just tutted about its silliness. You would be considered a stuffed shirt for not appreciating that. Humour has changed over the years. Loosen up.

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TheLittleDogLaughed · 30/11/2020 08:26

ginghamtablecloths yes but isn’t the point that just because it was ‘okay’ then doesn’t mean it is now? There were awful racist jokes on some of those postcards. You wouldn’t be a ‘stuffed shirt’ for disliking that today would you?

Casual everyday sexism doesn’t need to be just accepted.

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jillybeanclevertips · 30/11/2020 08:58

It's only offensive if your decide it is, it's obviously meant in fun, and sheould be recieved as such.

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Wanderdust · 30/11/2020 09:02

Shocked at how many people are OK with this, suspect only a certain generation would find this funny TBH. Really old fashioned.

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ErrolTheDragon · 30/11/2020 09:05

@Wanderdust

Shocked at how many people are OK with this, suspect only a certain generation would find this funny TBH. Really old fashioned.

I'm curious which generation you think would actually find it funny. As someone nearing 60 who grew up in a seaside town with racks of this in my childhood, it sure as heck isn't mine.
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Kaliorphic · 30/11/2020 09:06

Shocked at how many people are OK with this, suspect only a certain generation would find this funny TBH. Really old fashioned

Which generation is that then?

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Nonamesavail · 30/11/2020 09:08

I think the issue lies a bit deeper. Its not about being upright...its about a society ok with objectified women left right and centre.

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Thefirsttime · 30/11/2020 09:26

@jillybeanclevertips

It's only offensive if your decide it is, it's obviously meant in fun, and sheould be recieved as such.

Of course it shouldn’t be received as “fun”. So you’re saying sexist/racist/homophobic comments are fine if they’re made under the guise of being a “joke”? Utterly ridiculous.
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TheLittleDogLaughed · 30/11/2020 09:32

nonamesavail exactly that. Why is it okay?

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MummyMayo1988 · 30/11/2020 09:54

I too have big breasts - since I was 14 - and have had to put up with comments (like it's acceptable to make them to a 14 year old girl) most of my life.
I don't find this offensive; some women totally embrace what they've got but I also don't find it funny.
This is the kind of post I'd see and roll my eyes at.

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IamMaz · 30/11/2020 10:09

I think that if you find something 'offensive' it means you want someone else to change their behaviour because you are unable to control your own. Smile

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Hillary4 · 30/11/2020 10:20

What is the world coming to when people have such ludicrous levels of offence?

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TheLittleDogLaughed · 30/11/2020 10:31

IamMaz that must be one of the worst cod psychology things I have ever read. Do you find racism offensive? If so, then what does that say about you?!

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ErrolTheDragon · 30/11/2020 10:46

@IamMaz

I think that if you find something 'offensive' it means you want someone else to change their behaviour because you are unable to control your own. Smile

Really? So what aspect of the OPs behaviour in relation to this do you perceive to be out of control?Hmm
Idiotic comment.
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Thefirsttime · 30/11/2020 10:58

@IamMaz

I think that if you find something 'offensive' it means you want someone else to change their behaviour because you are unable to control your own. Smile

Christ alive. I have no words for the idiocy of this poster.
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TheLittleDogLaughed · 30/11/2020 12:02

The smiley face at the end of it says it all really. Boring wind up person. Yawn.

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