Doing this to a child is wrong

[fuckxmas]

BBC report : His said his 14-year-old daughter had not left her bedroom for four days, with meals being left outside her door, until the family learned the result was void on Thursday

This is so wrong to do to a child

Right, off to go and do something constructive. Will pop back in later, I'm sure the thread still won't have moved on from where I left it.

But that's exactly what we're all saying as well!

That isn’t the case. What is being said here is that this compulsion is justified. I don’t think that.

I am well aware that I am the one talking about making. If the child is made to stay in their room, that is unacceptable to me. Others are disagreeing

But I don't think most people are disagreeing.
Just no one else is making up a whole different scenario for the article and saying that the girl is now imprisoned in her bedroom.

@JesusInTheCabbageVan I just want to say, I love your user name

Apparently it’s fine to lock your kids in their bedrooms for days on the off-chance that they’re going to kill everyone they know when they have a bad cold/flu/no actual illness at all. Who knew?

And yet, no one here has said that. No one has locked anyone in.

You're cherry picking parts of post to try to strengthen your argument.

But it's everyone else who is wrong and unable to get the substance of your arguments. It's everyone else who is silly. Even though the vast majority on here seem not to be getting what you're saying. Maybe it's the way you're saying it. Or maybe it's the fact you keep twisting and turning and shifting those goalposts.

But I don't think most people are disagreeing

Yes they are. They are saying it is okay to confine a child to their room because of the situation. They are hiding that behind “Oh but it’s not force; show me where it says this etc.” I don’t really know why. If the above is your view, just own it. What’s with the argument about why I think things I don’t actually think, or why I’ve said things I haven’t? It’s silly.

And yet, no one here has said that. No one has locked anyone in.

Once again: I have not said anyone has used a physical lock. I have said if the child is confined against their will then that is very wrong. But others disagree.

Most people are simply responding to the article.

The teen self isolated in their room. They had meals brought to them.

It does not say she was forced to. It doesn't say she was told she had to. It doesn't say she had no choice. It doesn't say she tried to leave and was prevented.

So on the basis of that we can assume that she has self isolated and not really thought much beyond it's just what she should do - because all the guidelines do suggest this situation and most 14y are capable to reading and understanding the guidelines regarding SI.

It's certainly what Dd felt she should do when she thought she'd been in contact. It's what I believed I should do when I was positive. It's what most people would do to try to avoid the rest of the house being put at risk. Almost all 14y are likely to want to avoid putting their family at any greater risk.

Most people are simply saying that that is a pretty normal response.

Only you are adding in the 'but what if she was forced' angle.

Only you are adding in the 'but what if she was forced' angle.

Not so. Look at the title of the thread. “Doing this to a child is wrong.” Not a child doing it to themselves. And I simply responded to that title. My view is as valid as anyone else’s. IF the child is forced, that’s wrong.

I assume, then, that you agree with me?

Obviously forcing anyone to remain in the room isn't good be that with threats of words or actions, locks or not.

However, suggesting it or advising it, for the sake of keeping others safe, is not an issue - infact that is part of the guidelines.

Clearly if the teenager then refused it would not be acceptable to then force them. However there may be other consequences such as other members of the family then needing to stay away from them, such as a vulnerable member of the family needing to be kept in their room at a distance of the risky teen.

However NO ONE is actually saying that actually happened to this child. No one is saying that this teenager should have been barred from leaving their room. There is no indication that that has actually happened at all

Anyway I'm back home from my journey out (currently in car) so I'm out of this conversation.

I'm certainly not looking for some daft argument over things that haven't even happened?!

However, suggesting it or advising it, for the sake of keeping others safe, is not an issue - infact that is part of the guidelines.

But I haven’t at any point said it was the issue.

Clearly if the teenager then refused it would not be acceptable to then force them.

We agree, then.

The whole thread agrees that you can't force someone to stay in their room against their will.

wellthatsunusual

No, they didn’t. Please stop gaslighting people on the internet. It’s silly and obvious and doesn’t make you look very nice.

I haven't read the full thread (because it seems bonkers as usual) but I have told my teens that if they have to self isolate they will be in their rooms and use of the bathroom - that's it, for the full 10/14 days. Are they concerned? Not at all!

What was the longest time you confined your children to their rooms for?

Depended on age, of course, and severity of illness/contagion. But 4 days certainly wouldn't have been a problem. And "confined" sounds a bit brutal, as if they were desperately struggling- I don't remember either of them ever having a problem.

They do disagree. Nearly everyone on this thread thinks it is fine (or appears to think it is fine) to compel a child to remain in their room for days at a time. I do not think that. I haven’t twisted anything.

You are talking absolute nonsense. Asking me to point to where people have said something I have not claimed they have said, and resting on a word with two definitions. I have no need to engage with that.*

Here you go, you posted both of these statements. In the first you are claiming people have said they agree with locking kids in their rooms. So yes, you have made claims you clearly can't back up.

corythatwas

Were your children allowed out for exercise? And how many days was the longest period?

No, I would not have locked them in. But I would expect them (once they had reached the teens) to observe the same general rules and consideration as adults did towards them. If I had the flu they knew I would try to avoid giving it to them, so that their plans for the coming week wouldn't be spoilt. They expected the same general household rules to apply to them.

How many teenagers have you actually brought up, flaviaritt?

Ridiculous. This is why we shouldn’t even get tested unless absolutely necessary. The tests are not reliable, the death rate is low, our children’s future is being destroyed.
Do not comply. Do not get tested on your own accord.

In the first you are claiming people have said they agree with locking kids in their rooms.

Again, no. I haven’t said anyone is okay with using a physical lock. I have talked about “being locked in” to mean they are not allowed to leave, and I have been very clear about that. And yes, people on this thread (like Cory) have either done this or think it’s fine. I don’t.

How many teenagers have you actually brought up, flaviaritt?

That’s irrelevant.

In my experience, not all teens insist on being allowed to go out and exercise. More a case of having to cajole them, bribe them or (metaphorically) drag them out in many cases. My adult children do plenty of healthy exercise. At 14, they were rather less enthusiastic.

but I have told my teens that if they have to self isolate they will be in their rooms and use of the bathroom - that's it, for the full 10/14 days. Are they concerned? Not at all!

But what if they were?

corythatwas

But were they allowed? And how long for?

These aren’t difficult questions.