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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask for old washing machine back?

155 replies

msflibble · 23/11/2020 09:43

We moved into a new apartment in Feb and it only has space for a built-in washing machine. We had bought a great new one the previous spring which was unlikely to fit, so friends agreed to swap theirs with us - my husband arranged the swap, he thought the machines had similar specs but they don't really. Ours is worth at least a couple hundred more (we have only now just finished paying off the financing for it), it's virtually silent so you can do night washes, it has a bigger drum and is much easier to use - for example it has loads of presets but you can also just program your own presets. This one only has a few really limited presets and you can't program your own. It also only has 4 heat settings. The buttons are really hard and awkward to press and for example there's no option to do a short very hot wash, which is a setting I often need to get mould smells out of washing that didn't dry quickly enough after a previous wash (often a problem in winter).

I miss my old machine! And I'm gutted that we shelled out for a lovely one, carefully chosen by me, only to end up with a fairly shit one I don't like. I have worked out that it may be possible to get the machine to fit under the space if we remove the legs; if not, I'd like to sell it and get something instead that suits our needs better.

I messaged our friend to ask if we might swap back, and she hasn't replied. I'm worried she is offended as they agreed to swap as a favour to help us. Was it an unreasonable request?

OP posts:
liveitwell · 23/11/2020 12:43

Too much time has passed. Unfortunately this is just one of those moments you have to suck it up. It's annoying, we've all been there.

Mummyoflittledragon · 23/11/2020 12:45

@user1493494961

If you had to build a new kitchen, why did you have to swap machines?
Yeh this is what I was thinking. Very confusing. Glad I live in my head sometimes...
ktp100 · 23/11/2020 12:46

Wowzers!! Do you have a CF streak, OP?!!

I'd be too mortified to even suggest it, especially as the whole idea was from your end in the first place!

You messed up and you need to suck it up!!

Riapia · 23/11/2020 12:57

In our playground we always used to say “No swaps back.”
If they didn’t say that then you can demand yours back.
That’s the rools, everybody knows.

HTH. 😁😁

stschiap · 23/11/2020 12:58

You realise what you are saying is this: Hey you know that washing machine that you bought and were happy enough with, and gave to us to help us out? Well its not good enough for us, we can't cope with sucha crappy machine. It's good enough for you though, so here, have it back.

^This
Plus
Oh and by the way if it doesn't fit in the kitchen we want to sell it and we'll get more money for selling it than we would for your crappy machine with buttons which are too difficult to press.

FFS.

Sunflowergirl1 · 23/11/2020 12:58

You would really be taking the piss

CovidAnni · 23/11/2020 13:00

eugh, I really feel for you OP
Flowers
I hope it sorts out

Cherrysoup · 23/11/2020 13:05

You GAVE it to them. You can’t now expect them to give it back.

You built the kitchen from scratch but could only fit an integrated machine? Well, that’s idiotic. We built our kitchen and ensured all the white goods would fit. How come you didn’t?

It won’t fit, remove the legs and expect it to ruin the floor. They have legs for a reason. Save and buy a new one.

HannaYeah · 23/11/2020 13:08

If I were your friend I wouldn’t be upset to be asked. She was trying to do you a favor and either doesn’t care that much about washing machines or realizes that yours is much better than hers. In fact, I’d always feel a little guilty about trading my crappy WM for your new fancy one.

I don’t really think I could have asked, but it’s done now. I hope you get it back. Having a decent washing machine is a simple thing that makes life more bearable.

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 23/11/2020 13:12

J can't believe anyone would be as stupid as to swap a band new washing machine, they hadn't even paid off yet, for a washing machine that cost half the price. Thats absolutely mental!

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 23/11/2020 13:13

AND you didn't even have a kitchen in the new house. You had to build it so why didn't you buy a kitchen that could accommodate your own machine?

Happyheartlovelife · 23/11/2020 13:23

This is brilliant.

But surely if it didn’t fit then. It won’t fit now?!?

Not only did you say. Here. Have your worse machine. You’ve then said. But if we give you an extra £100. You’ll have your crappy machine back

I would be furious. It’s not yours. I wouldn’t speak to you after that

What if you brought a car. Then 9 months down the line. The couple knocked on your door snd said we want it back. You’d give it back would you?

Vermeil · 23/11/2020 13:32

Let’s not lose sight of the fact that this is all over what is now essentially a two year old washing machine. It’s out of warranty and what you paid for it originally is irrelevant. Sell the one you’ve got, chuck in the €100 bribe you're considering, and get another machine. Yes, there’ll be a short period where you’ll have to go to the launderette, but that’s what everybody in that situation has to do.
Anyway, if you’ve got issues with mould smell due to slow drying laundry then your old machine isn’t suitable either, no matter how much you liked it. A hot wash isn’t the answer to the problem. You need a washer dryer with a condenser. Buy a second hand one.

comingintomyown · 23/11/2020 13:41

Can’t believe you didn’t just put this down to experience? Incredible that you have asked to swap back not cheeky just absurd I wouldn’t want to look that stupid

123becauseicouldntthinkofone · 23/11/2020 13:42

Unfortunately we all make wrong decisions at times and have to live with the consequences.

They did you the favour as you said they didn't want to swap and it is all about your convenience. Just got to suck this one up afraid, she probably hasn't replied because she is astounded you would do this and doesn't even know how to reply. i would send another message apologising and you may keep your friendship.

ScotchBunnet · 23/11/2020 13:50

Yes, I think it was unreasonable to ask for yours back. You agreed to the switch in the first place - it’s your lookout that you made a bad bargain. If I were your friend I would agree for the sake of peace but I would be annoyed at the inconvenience and I would think it was a rude request.

Peppafrig · 23/11/2020 13:58

Has she replied yet or is she still in shock about what a CF you have been ?

Crankley · 23/11/2020 15:50

Such CFery, I'm cringing with embarrassment on your behalf and even after 100% have posted YABU, you still don't get it.

Original poster
msflibble · 23/11/2020 19:06

@Laiste - the one we bought was a Bosch WAY287W5. The one we have now is a Siemens WM14P420. I'm glad someone understands :)

For those asking - we couldn't put it in the kitchen because there was no inlet valve or extra space. Everything was already planned, there was nowhere else to put it. There was only an available inlet valve under the bathroom sink. Not that anybody asking gives a shit, they just want an excuse to rag on a complete stranger who's never actually harmed them in any way over a minor transgression with a friend who they've also never met.

Really want to know what goes on in the mind of people who think it's ok to call another human being stupid, nuts, self-absorbed, over something so minor. People say shit they'd never say in real life, really hurtful nasty things, over nothing at all. It's pretty fucked up.

OP posts:
Peppafrig · 23/11/2020 19:09

I want to know what goes on in the minds of people who think it’s ok to ask for a washing machine back after 9 months .

Original poster
msflibble · 23/11/2020 19:14

I guess just that it isn't right for us but they seemed happy enough with it so why not ask if they still could be?

Much more innocuous imo than not giving a shit about piling in on someone and making them feel like the worst person in the world over a fucking washing machine

OP posts:
Peppafrig · 23/11/2020 19:16

@msflibble for all the reasons in all the comments above . You still think it’s ok when 94% of people have told you your unreasonable ? Did she reply to your text yet?

LightUpLetters · 23/11/2020 19:21

I think you’re having us on op.....

RealBecca · 23/11/2020 19:26

Yabu. It's possible they've swapped or sold it on or damaged it and are now really stressed. Thats wgyit was unreasonable to ask after so long. And its a massive inconvenience to them, it may damage their floor, all sorts. It's also awkward because they clearly will know that it's because theirs isn't good enough. The one you swapped wasn't fit for purpose (at the time), you've swapped and this one isn't for for purpose. Sorry but that's just bad luck. If you'd ordered their one from a shop, used it for 6 months, you wouldn't be able to return it. Returning theirs because it doesn't fit is PART of the reason, the other part, if you're honest with yourself, is that theirs isn't good enough. That's why it's awkward.

They probably will but i think you feel awkward for all the reasons you're worried about.

RealBecca · 23/11/2020 19:28

If you really wanted to ask for it back it would have been better to float it indirectly over the phone or in person. "How's the machine? Oh yeah, haha we really miss it, turms out this one doesnt fit either! if you ever get sick of it send it back, I offer an exchange service!" And see if they offered. Not a direct text 😳