Too many people and too few bathrooms?

[NearlyMonday]

DH and I have been invited to a birthday celebration next summer (COVID-permitting). The hosts have booked a large country house and it’s a Friday-Monday event. There will be 10 couples, so 20 guests in total, but there are only two bathrooms ………. I can’t see this working, or AIBU? I think we had a better bathroom ratio when I was at University!

@NearlyMonday

And the hosts are not charging us for this.

Here you go @itsovernowthen.

And if I was generous enough to pay for a weekend away for 20 people and one of them was rude enough to suggest I paid for a different property, I’d rescind the invitation and remove them from my address book.

Agree with sst : the host is an idiot if it hadn't occurred to them that it was an issue. Avoid. Sounds grim.

It wouldn’t be the lack of showers for me, but the lack of and sharing toilets that would put me off. Also would not like to share a house with so many people I don’t know.

I won’t go, even if it’s close family, I won’t survive. Of course I could do this if it’s emergency but not for fun/pleasure.
Is the host male?

Greenlynx - I think you probably would survive

If it's an Old, large country house, there maybe some chamber pots under all the beds, and washstands on the dressing tables!

I might contemplate it with close family or friends but arranging bathing and toileting schedules with strangers just sounds awkward. Also surely those with the ensuites aren't going to want strangers wandering through their rooms?

I think in this situation the people with the ensuites have to accept the ensuites being used by everyone, the one in the main house at least. The annex one probably being dependent on how convenient it is to the main house.

If you don't want your ensuite to be available to everyone in the house, you just take one of the none ensuite rooms, there's plenty of them.

You'd hope that amongst 10 couples you could find at least one who would agree to the ensuite on the proviso that during the daytime it is available for everyone's use.

@VinylDetective

And if I was generous enough to pay for a weekend away for 20 people and one of them was rude enough to suggest I paid for a different property, I’d rescind the invitation and remove them from my address book.

This is a bit dramatic! Suggesting another house which has enough bathrooms to accommodate all the guests is hardly friendship crime of the century.

If I was the host and one of the guests politely suggested another place with a reason like this that benefits us all, I wouldn't end the relationship over it; I'd either say yes, or say no.

When we visit PiL, there are 5 of us to one bathroom (toilet is in there too) and that's already bad enough.

That situation wouldn't be for me, OP! No way.

Country house? Sounds more like a cheap hostel!

Not for me...

I have long, thick hair that I wash every day and there's no way I could do this in a sink.

Hmmm after being stuck indoors and not being able to mix with friends this year, nothing will stop me from socialising next year post covid-19.

My advice is invest in a good quality dry shampoo, take some wetwipes, possibly go for one night and enjoy the celebrations.

I was just about to suggest wet wipes, dry shampoo and VIPoo sprays which I would leave in bathrooms. And maybe some scented candles for the bathrooms.

as it seems odd a house would have 10 bedrooms and only 2 bathrooms.

It sounds like two dormitories, with a bathroom each. How many showers? How do you feel about showering side by side with others ?

DH has always been a bit 'funny' and insisted on having a room with en-suite. As I've got older, I have come to value it more and more.

As a teenager, what you describe would be fine for me. As students (sailing club) we often went away for the weekend without any thought for where to stay, there would be a floor somewhere.

Nowadays, not so much.

Unless there are people with IBS/urgent toilet issues

In a random group of twenty, there would almost certainly be people whose lives are to some degree shaped by urgent toilet issues.

I'm guessing that only those who do not have that type of issue would be able to enjoy a trip away with this type of configuration, so their participation may be driven by whether they are in that situation.

People who do (have issues) just self select away from situations which would be intolerable.

God No, sounds beyond grim.

Each person could have a 15 minute slot in the morning for the bathroom spread over 2.5 hours. It’s doable but definitely not ideal.

Not having access to a toilet when I need it would be a big deal for me. Imagine if there a 8 male guests taking a 30 minute shit each every morning. Plus all the extra peeing due to alcohol.

My DPs only have one bathroom which has the only toilet in it. It's a nightmare when the 4 of us go and stay with them. Especially when DM doesn't check if anyone wants the loo before she goes for one of her 30 minute showers.

This thread has made me realise I am getting old.
Not in a million years would I go on this weekend.
The idea of sharing facilities with that many people is making me shudder.

Surely if you have 'long thick hair', it's better not to wash it every day

Billy1966, I think it's got zero to do with age and more to do with attitude

Imagine being the 16th person to have your morning shit

Everyone will need a shit at the same time.... it will be awful