But you can’t get pregnant with the coil ffs. That’s the whole point.

[TeddyIsaHe]

This is truly not happening. I have literally just split up with a horrendously abusive man.

Horrid cramps. Feeling sick. Peeing all the time and now I have a positive test.

Tell me this is not happening.

@TeddyIsaHe

We didn’t live together and we have no ties at all so I’m heading towards not telling him.

I feel gross for even saying that, but I can’t picture any situation in which me having to make contact about this will end well.

Judging by your posts i wouldn't tell him either. See your GP and make the right choice for you.

Have you any friends or family you can trust to help you?

Other posters can flame me if they will, but remember that you don't have to tell him a damn thing if you don't want to. You can handle this on your own no matter how you decide to handle it. If he is indeed horribly abusive, it'd actually probably be easier if that way

I agree. If you decide to keep the baby, you have to do what is best for the baby. In circumstances where he has been horribly abusive, if you genuinely think the child is better off without him, then don’t tell him. Don’t put him on the birth cert either.

It will mean you won’t get child support, but is the money worth it to have him back in your life?

But yes, GP to rule out ectopic or any other issues.

That’s really shit. I hope you’ve got some good friends you can rant to

I remember, as a student midwife, finding a coil embedded in a placenta.
Mother and baby were both fine.
As PP said, see GP as you may need checks to find location of coil.

I didn't realise how common it was for the coil to fail, how upsetting for you and yes if you do not want to continue with the pregnancy, that is your choice.

I would not tell him either way whatever you decide.

BPAS may be able to help to x

A false positive is incredibly rare, I’m sorry OP.
Whatever you decide to do, a visit to the GP ASAP is necessary because having a coil fitted can bring added complications if you fall pregnant. So you’ll need a scan to figure out what’s where etc. X

don't ever tell him. so sorry op

You can and will get through this.

Whatever you choose has to be entirely your decision and you have no obligation whatsoever to tell him.

2020 is nearly done- get through this, start again. Talk through it with a professional. Keep talking. Don’t let any of this cloud your future.

FWIW I would not tell him, nor would I proceed with the pregnancy.

Very sorry that you're in this situation

@MarinPrime

I remember, as a student midwife, finding a coil embedded in a placenta. Mother and baby were both fine. As PP said, see GP as you may need checks to find location of coil.

Yeah everything heard this happen, have also seen a photo of a baby born holding the coil in its hand (not surf that was real?), my old art teacher fell pregnant on the coil and had a very healthy baby girl, yes it’s rare but it can happen, there’s also a chance that the coil has fallen out?

OP, I think I what I would do in your situation, I thought I was pregnant after I kicked abusive ex out, I was full of mixed emotions as there’s traumatic enough (police involved). I don’t think I could have gone through with it if I was pregnant only because I didn’t ever want any contact with ex again and even though I had blocked him, removed him from my life and had an injunction out against him he would still probably of found out and would then be in my life forever.

Oh op I’m sorry this has happened
Whatever you decide to do good luck and hope you can get hold of GP soon

I am so sorry that this has happened when you clearly didn't want it.

Don't panic - Do see you GP ASAP, if only because having the coil puts you at greater risk of an ectopic pregnancy.

Give yourself some time to reflect, but do not give him any say (like you say, maybe the best is not even to inform him), keep yourself safe from abuse.

The doctors and midwive will understand. Put your trust in them.

Good luck OP!

You have a choices. You don have to continue this pregnancy

I'm so sorry OP, my heart goes out to you. What a terrible shock.

I wouldn't judge or blame you for having a termination in these circumstances, your priority at this time should be yourself and any existing children you might already have.

Sending a hand hold

Just don't delay in doing something

I got pregnant with the coil over 30 years ago. I was in shock and denial at first and did not really believe it till I saw the ultrasound. I went ahead with the pregnancy and had a healthy baby. This is your decision alone to make and whatever you choose, be kind to yourself.

Sorry it happened op. Obviously make a call today, you might be able to have chemical abortion, which is not very different from morning after pill or heavy period in how it feels.

Maybe next time it would be wiser to use condoms unless you are in a stable committed relationship, not just because of pregnancy possibility, but also diseases.

Right I’ve miraculously managed to get a call back from the dr this afternoon. So fingers crossed can get in at the EPAU as soon as.

Thank you all so much for your kind words and support. Honestly MN is bloody excellent sometimes. Feel less like my brain is going to explode this morning.

[flowers} Teddy, so glad you've been able to get onto the doctor's so promptly, and a hand hold. Hopefully should all be done and dusted soon.

And I forgot to say earlier - bloody well done for getting out of the abusive relationship. I know it's not as easy as it's sometimes made out to be on here.

You'll be ok OP.

You don't want a baby, and you definitely don't want one with an abusive man; that's a path towards 20 years of awful.

Take care

That’s great you’ve got a call back today. Wishing you a straightforward path to sorting this out

Good luck today!

OP I have no words I only clicked on as I have the coil in.
I have no advice other than echo what pp have said.
Congratulations on getting away from an abusive man.

I'm so very sorry that you're in this position, but so very happy that you found out about it after you got away from the bastard. I'm so proud of you for finding the strength. I know how difficult that is. Fortunately you also managed to speak to a doctor very quickly and I hope that this is resolved a humanely as possible for you.