Facebook seller- Delightful home decoration or jizz on a mirror?

[FlamboyantMustard]

This lady is clearly getting creative in lockdown, and I applaud her resourcefulness, that she's recycling, and she is selling things so clearly has identified an audience but...

Does this not look like a bloke spaffed on a mirror?

Hope the pictures post or this makes no sense.

@Onpause

Who buys that crap? I can just see it though, in a grey room with a crushed grey velvet sofa and grey curtains with mirror furniture and b and m tat lying around. Oh and those mirrors people think look like windows, so stick three up in a row 🤮

I was fully behind you until the window mirrors, window mirrors are lovely & not at all related to the crushed velvet, grey clad, Chanel book, b&m tat living rooms?? Are they?? definitely haven’t just bought a window mirror

Surely it would have to be a la vindaloo fencing mask...wouldn't Mrs Poosties nose create a balance issue if it was flat side down?

I am finally back, been busy with DH, not pyrex related busy obviously!

I've been racking my brains trying to remember how the conversation came up in the first place but as I said in my original post it was a VERY long time ago and I was just an innocent young thing.

I was the only female in an all male environment and the one loo had porno mags in it!

For those of you who are concerned it may be your postie the area is NW England, however I am guessing he has long since retired.

I was once agog when asked to be schtupped with a Snickers

You’ve reminded me of a request from a boyfriend to play “hide the mini Mars bar” with a tub of Celebrations one Christmas.

I let him win

But if Postman Poop pooed on the flat side he would need to be confident it's a solid 💩. It might slide off otherwise.

Oh that's good

I knew a guy who lived in Norwich in the 70s. He was adamant that a cheesy but popular celebrity (and subsequent National Treasure) had a thing about lying under a glass topped table while a young man would, ahem, shit onto the table.

I have no idea if it’s true, but apparently he had quite the reputation in that part of the world.

Nowt so strange as folk, eh?

@HeIsAVeryBadBoy

How, how.... (obvs I'm thinking about pyrex dish here)... how the fuck does that become a thing between two people?

Wait... you've never had that conversation with your other half?

Standing in the kitchen, doing the washing up and you suddenly turn to your dear husband, suds covered Pyrex bowl held aloft... "Dhaaarling! What about Pyrex? It would be perfect for shitting in!"

@FlamboyantMustard

This lady is clearly getting creative in lockdown, and I applaud her resourcefulness, that she's recycling, and she is selling things so clearly has identified an audience but...

Does this not look like a bloke spaffed on a mirror?

Hope the pictures post or this makes no sense.

So that's what was in Cummings box, they must have a deal.

Would Mr. Poostie shit into the bowl part of the Pyrex dish so that Mrs. Poostie would have the balance the flat part on her face, or would she have her face in the bowl with him pooing on the flat underside?

How would you even get to that stage though?

“Darling, I’ve got an idea...”
“Mmm?”
“You know that Pyrex dish that we never use? The one that your aunt Maud gave us as a wedding present? How about...you hold it over your face while I shit in it? It would be...sexy!”

@LoseLooseLucy

But what is this meant to be? A mirror? Wall tat? What is it?

It’s a mirror-cum-wall art.

😂

It's the 2020 version of the velvet walls and mirrors on the ceiling look

@draughtycatflap

“Maureen! Something somethings stirring! Muster the Pyrex and a couple of ramekins.”

Oh god stop- this is just giving me a stomach ache from laughing.

@BrightYellowDaffodil

Would Mr. Poostie shit into the bowl part of the Pyrex dish so that Mrs. Poostie would have the balance the flat part on her face, or would she have her face in the bowl with him pooing on the flat underside?

How would you even get to that stage though?

“Darling, I’ve got an idea...”
“Mmm?”
“You know that Pyrex dish that we never use? The one that your aunt Maud gave us as a wedding present? How about...you hold it over your face while I shit in it? It would be...sexy!”

My theory is that they started with a glass coffee table but Mrs. Poostie got sick of cleaning it (let’s face it, a husband who shits onto a glass bowl suspended over your face isn’t really going to go 50/50 on the housework, is he?) and negotiated down to a Pyrex dish that’s go into the dishwasher.

She’s probably slowly trying to work their way down to a shot glass.

(Autocorrect changed that to shit glass. Very satisfying).

Shitting on a table must be a thing. The chap I worked for many years ago told us about a woman he used to work with doing exactly that. Apparently her husband used to lay underneath while she did the deed onto the table. They had been and purchased a rather expensive glass coffee table specifically to suit their needs! (Never heard of Pyrex used in that way but I suppose if your coffee table's oak or something then needs must!)

I was tempted to ask DH if he wanted me to shit in a Pyrex bowl for him but then I remembered we don’t have a Pyrex bowl, only a jug we make custard in and then I would need to get a new custard jug so damn that ideas out.

Plus I think he may think I had gone insane and Ewww who does that? I always thought it was more for a shock porn thing that actual real people doing it.

I had a nose on Reddit and wow some of the threads on there 🤮🤮🤮

www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/9zvjfx/wife_told_me_she_wanted_to_experiment_i_obliged/

@Snazzysausage

Shitting on a table must be a thing. The chap I worked for many years ago told us about a woman he used to work with doing exactly that. Apparently her husband used to lay underneath while she did the deed onto the table. They had been and purchased a rather expensive glass coffee table specifically to suit their needs! (Never heard of Pyrex used in that way but I suppose if your coffee table's oak or something then needs must!)

Wow how the hell do you get onto that topic of conversation at work 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Postman Splat
Postman Splat
Postman Splat and his great fat ass
Curling one out this morning...

His wife lying down there
Just yawning...

I’m at a loss to understand this, for whose ‘enjoyment’ is it? The person who views the act or the person who is evacuating themselves?

Honestly, I will never look at my Pyrex the same way. Gives a whole new level of meaning to the Sunday roast.

@wheresmymojo

Postman Splat Postman Splat Postman Splat and his great fat ass Curling one out this morning...

His wife lying down there
Just yawning...

This thread is hilarious!! I don’t normally click on the Facebook tat threads but something drew me to this one and I’m so glad it did!

I’m doing the crying Muttley laugh in bed.

I went on a tinder date with a bloke a couple of years ago and he told me he’d been due to meet a woman a month or so earlier but he’d dropped out as she’d casually mentioned that she was hoping he’d be willing to shit into a slow cooker in front of her. I hope that was a wind up. Those ceramic liners are a bugger to get clean.

@WillYouDoTheFandango you can get liners for your slow cooker now, not very environmentally friendly though.😮

I don’t have any weird fettishes involving this but if I was looking to get into poop play I would look at specialised online dating rather than asking random dates if they want to try it. I imagine the vast majority of people prefer crapping alone into a toilet.

Postman Shat?

@jambeforeclottedcream
The woman concerned had found out her husband was having an affair,she was upset at work and it all came out.
I worked in a little team of 4 with my boss and 2 others and over the 10 years or so we had some weird and wonderful conversations - that was just one of them!

@Snazzysausage

Shitting on a table must be a thing. The chap I worked for many years ago told us about a woman he used to work with doing exactly that. Apparently her husband used to lay underneath while she did the deed onto the table. They had been and purchased a rather expensive glass coffee table specifically to suit their needs! (Never heard of Pyrex used in that way but I suppose if your coffee table's oak or something then needs must!)

We don't own a coffee table (oak or glass) nor a pyrex dish.

No wonder my marriage has lost its sparkle