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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed at people shopping in families/couples?

875 replies

Nicknamegoeshere · 08/11/2020 16:37

So I went to the supermarket to do my weekly shop today. Left the baby and my OH at home as I understand the current rules re Covid to be shop alone where possible.

Now I totally respect that in certain circumstances there has to be exceptions to this rule e.g. for lone parents, shopping with a vulnerable person etc.

However, there were a huge number of large families (with both parents) shopping today, lots and lots of couples (young/middle-aged) etc.

Why are so many people blatantly ignoring the guidance?

OP posts:
Livelovebehappy · 09/11/2020 20:27

TBH, are there many people actually following the rules? Lots with no masks, lots in big groups shopping, when guidance says otherwise. People cling to that word ‘guidance’ when excusing anything, but that’s precisely why people shouldn’t be given guidance, we should have enforced rules in place. Guidance means the action is recommended to help stop the spread of infections, so why do people ignore it?

pollypot123 · 09/11/2020 20:33

100% agree. This drives me mad, especially in small farm shops near us where the capacity is so small anyway and it takes 5 minutes to whizz round!

Rosebel · 09/11/2020 20:33

I care because I work in a supermarket home shopping. Trying to doge endless families and get round them to pick the shopping is a nightmare. Listening to endless tantrums isn't my idea of fun either.

grifffendor · 09/11/2020 20:35

if its not about someone sun bathing in park or seeing kids playing in a sand pit or shoping as family that someone feel the needs to moan about it , instead of judging them why do you ask OP. I am sure there is perfectly logical reason to be doing it .

I don't care what others do , I click and collect or online shop saves the hassle draging kids around the supermarket full stop , convenient and quick never mind lock down or covid .
Don't know about anyone else on here but I am certainly looking forward to a time in future when people who stop getting on their high horse and penalising the ordinary folk for doing such mundane and boring things that normally nobody gives a flying monkeys about before this pandemic .
honestly its like some have taken up a new hobby in lockdowns , lets go down to the supermarket\ park/ beach \ town and spot how many breaking the law or guidelines then moan about it and blame it on the increase of cases . YABU.

NeedWineNow · 09/11/2020 20:42

@Rhine

Why does a couple need to go shopping together? It’s clingy, controlling and weird, Don’t get me started on whole families who do it. Just why?
Clingy, controlling and weird?!

Just when you think MN couldn't get any worse someone will pop up to prove you wrong.

THEDEACON · 09/11/2020 20:56

YANBU Totally agree with you OP

Bellfit · 09/11/2020 20:58

Have you let your DH do the food shopping?

amispeakingenglish · 09/11/2020 21:46

Totally agree with OP

amispeakingenglish · 09/11/2020 21:48

Rhine

Why does a couple need to go shopping together? It’s clingy, controlling and weird, Don’t get me started on whole families who do it. Just why?

Yes unless you are on the way somewhere, why? It only takes one to shop.

NeedWineNow You are the worse one here, judging etc etc. Just cos someone has a different view to you doesn't mean you have to be so rude and superiour sounding.

DarkMintChocolate · 09/11/2020 21:50

I have a 12 week old ebf and a 19 month old and so if DH wants to eat in the week he needs to come with me to the supervisor

???! DS and DDIL have a toddler and ebf baby. DS goes once a week to do the shopping on his own - has done since the first lockdown in March, when DDIL was pregnant?

@Bookworming

There are queues outside the supermarket in town here, even on a weekday.

Perhaps all those families who like to go shopping as a trip out, should consider if the R rate doesn’t come down enough, the next step might be to close schools. If they can’t use their common sense now, they might have their children at home all the time!

2020iscancelled · 09/11/2020 21:50

I’ll tell you why I did it yesterday - because we couldn’t get a click and collect or delivery slot.
My partner works long hours and I am at home with two young kids all day every day.
One of us usually goes and does the shopping alone, the other is with kids at home.
But yday I was having a very bad mental health day and have been having them for a while, I didn’t want to stay home with kids on my own for another few hours whilst OH went to do our big shop but I couldn’t deal with the prospect of doing it all myself on my own as usual.
I just couldn’t deal with it.
If you know that feeling then you know.

So we all went, kids enjoyed being in the trolley and it was so much easier and quicker for
Me and OH to tag team grabbing the shopping and one pushing the trolley, packing and sorting car was also a lot easier than it usually is for me.

Is this a valid reason enough for you? That for one time out of 7 months we just decided for our own sanity to tackle it together. Probably not valid enough for the self appointed Covid police.

You don’t know peoples reasons for deciding to balance their own risk against the guidance given and this applies to all the social scenarios.

SaltedCaramelIcedLatte · 09/11/2020 21:57

I agree OP, it is so bloody annoying! There was a family of 5 shopping 2day, mum, dad and 3 teenage kids just casually chatting away as they shopped for goodies...absolute joke! Not one essential item in the basket!!

Bookworming · 09/11/2020 22:06

I agree OP, it is so bloody annoying! There was a family of 5 shopping 2day, mum, dad and 3 teenage kids just casually chatting away as they shopped for goodies...absolute joke! Not one essential item in the basket!!

Jesus are people now assessing and judging others shopping, no essential items. Did they buy stuff other that bread and milk. How fucking dare they!

oknowimscared · 09/11/2020 22:07

You are definitely NBU. I am so sick of people thinking they’re somehow special and the rules don’t apply to them 😡

Timekeepspassing · 09/11/2020 22:08

There are some genuine reasons why some people can’t shop alone but in the main most people can but are choosing not to. I have to take my 13 month old son with me this week as his father is on call so he can’t watch him while I shop. It would be easier for us to all go together (as we did pre covid) but won’t as it isn’t about what is easy right now.

Bookworming · 09/11/2020 22:08

@DarkMintChocolate as I've already stated we have no queues outside out supermarkets 🙅‍♀️

Meadowland · 09/11/2020 22:33

YANBU. It's because of selfish people who "want a day out at the shops together" that this lockdown will probably have to be extended.

Purplelion · 09/11/2020 22:33

Do people not understand that by shopping in groups (When there isn’t a genuine reason) is just selfish? As a supermarket worker we are turning people away now who come as a couple/family unless they have a genuine reason. The capacity is less than half of what it normally is and people shouldn’t have to queue because some people can’t possibly shop alone

Localocal · 09/11/2020 22:39

I go with my husband sometimes. We split the list and are in and out in half the time.

Joodleoodle · 09/11/2020 22:41

I go with my adult son so he can push the trolley (I have mobility issues) but it means I have to take my youngest son with us.

starlight13 · 09/11/2020 22:41

Couldn't agree more OP. It seems totally obvious not to schlepp a whole group around a shop at the moment, but then don't get me started on the whole family shopping together issue - it is weird to want to all go shopping en masse week in, week out. Why haven't these people got other things to get on with than to both do the same chores together? Why would you have the hassle of dragging the children around the shops when they could be at home with the other partner or out playing etc?
The whole thing is clingy, controlling and it's almost as if this is the highlight of their weekend.

RufustheSniggeringReindeer · 09/11/2020 22:42

@Bookworming

I agree OP, it is so bloody annoying! There was a family of 5 shopping 2day, mum, dad and 3 teenage kids just casually chatting away as they shopped for goodies...absolute joke! Not one essential item in the basket!!

Jesus are people now assessing and judging others shopping, no essential items. Did they buy stuff other that bread and milk. How fucking dare they!

Theyve been doing it since lockdown

Everybody’s idea of essential differs anyway, plus how nosy do you have to be to check other peoples baskets and trollies

BluebellsGreenbells · 09/11/2020 22:42

You don’t know peoples reasons for deciding to balance their own risk against the guidance given and this applies to all the social scenario

Your own risk. What about the risk to others?

And yes I’ve been there, and when that happens I go to a local shop for a few days supply.

Orkneys · 09/11/2020 22:42

[quote Nicknamegoeshere]@HotChoc10 The majority of these couples were with trollies so I assume transport isn't an issue.[/quote]
I shop with a trolley and walk home!! I shop with my autistic daughter if that's OK with you??!!!!

middleager · 09/11/2020 22:45

Can't think of anything less appealing than DH and our 2 kids joining me in the supermarket.

YANBU.

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