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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu? Are you really following lockdown rules?

490 replies

CoronaOneSoz · 08/11/2020 13:36

I work and kids are at school but I've been following the lockdown rules. Not met anyone. I know I could bubble up as I'm a single parent. Anyway i spoke to my sister and parents today and they have all met up together. Sister has 2 kids and a husband, the kids go to school and they both work. My parents are still relatively young and work, no health issues. They also still have my other sister at home who also works. I was abit shocked but they just laughed and said they don't care they will still meet up. I'm not pissed off I'm more disappointed with them. Aibu for feeling like that? Just been told I need to lighten up as i told them they are breaking the rules.

OP posts:
AlphaJura · 08/11/2020 14:58

Something I do though, and I did it all throughout the first lockdown is go to the shop every day. I know some people try to limit the amount of shops they go to, but with a family of five, even if I buy a couple of week's food for the freezer and cupboards, I still end up having to go out for 'top up' stuff like milk, fresh stuff and snacks daily. There's nothing to say you can't go to a shop every day if you need to. I wear a mask, hand sanitize and SD and try and be as quick as possible.

Oblomov20 · 08/11/2020 14:58

We are. But I don't really believe in the rules anymore.

No cases in our area. Do I think that ds2 going to football training, or me meeting with my 2 closest friends in one of their gardens, would make any difference. No. I don't. I'm not sure I can support this anymore. I will do it, but I don't agree with it, ifswim.

Saladfingersscaresme · 08/11/2020 14:58

Yes but if I didn’t have a vulnerable DC I would be slightly more lax. I’m lonely and bored and fed up and there’s months more boredom and loneliness to come.

sqirrelfriends · 08/11/2020 14:58

I follow the rules, I would be devastated if I caught COVID and passed it on needlessly because I'd seen people I shouldn't have.

Generally I try not to judge but I do find myself getting annoyed with a certain family on my street who have all their kids and grandkids over every day (not just childcare) and even had a fireworks party. I naively thought I might have a break from their grandkids kicking balls at the front of my house and parking over my drive.

NOTANUM · 08/11/2020 14:59

Following the rules here.
We weren't as good before lockdown 2 happened - the kids might have a friend pop in to collect homework or whatever - but it's now very clear what to do.

Saladfingersscaresme · 08/11/2020 15:00

Also cases have jumped up in my area over the last couple of weeks, the virus missed us the first time round, few people were in hospital and a handful of deaths, only one care home affected, it looks like it’s going to be different this time round.

Mummyoflittledragon · 08/11/2020 15:00

We were in tier 1. Dh and I are. We aren’t going anywhere outside dh going to work, not even supermarkets. Dd is seeing a child a few doors down in their garden - side gate access. I am struggling to see the difference between that and the park. She can come home for the loo.

Redcrayons · 08/11/2020 15:00

Yes I am.
I work from home, only shopping once a week anyway and everything is shut so there’s nowhere to go.

I did stop to chat to two friends at the same time yesterday. I didn’t arrange to meet them though so not sure that’s a rule break.

Fcuk38 · 08/11/2020 15:02

What a load of tosh like he’s going to get stopped by the police and asked where he’s going. Completly in the rules anyway if he lives on his own he can have a support bubble so you can mix with him.

Nailgirl · 08/11/2020 15:02

Yes I am.
Others are not.

It concerns me as I feel I'm protecting others whilst they do little to protect me.

Cookerhood · 08/11/2020 15:02

Yep, following the rules here & I don't know anyone who isn't. Presumably no-one is in Oldham or Blackburn etc which is why the rates are still so high there in spite of months of local restrictions.

WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants · 08/11/2020 15:03

@FiorDiPanna

I don’t even know if I’m breaking them or not.

I met my mum for a walk yesterday with one of my children in tow. Is that allowed? To be honest we were in a large London park, it was packed and clearly there were large groups of friends, more than one family together etc, and nobody was making an effort to social distance. So...I felt pretty obedient in comparison.

Next weekend I’m having my friend’s child to stay for the weekend, as my friend’s mum is gravely ill and she needs some child-free time to make some arrangements for her . Is that informal childcare? Or against the rules?

I’ll admit I am just using my own judgement most of the time.

As you're asking....

It's ok for you to meet your mum outside for a walk, but you should be 2m apart or wearing masks you can be a bit closer. It's not ok to take children 5+

Childcare bubbles are permitted, but it needs to be the same child & same childcare providers, & ideally not sleeping over. It wouldn't be ok for you to have different children for 'childcare' or for the child to be going to different households.

Try to keep rooms ventilated & if the child will settle, to sleep in separate rooms.

But I'm only saying because you asked. It's one thing to do what you're doing for a bloody good reason & quite another for people to be socialising because they dgaf.

I hope you friend's mum recovers.

@CoronaOneSoz. Yes, I am. Not because they're the 'rulz', but because it's a horrible virus & I think it's important for everyone to minimise any possible transmission that they can.

Madcats · 08/11/2020 15:04

Following the rules here. I've left the house/garden twice this week to lend something to a neighbour and walk round to the corner shop. We are fortunate to have enough space; one of the reasons we've been "staying home" is because there are loads of students in small rooms without outside space who need to wander outdoors more than we do.

If we weren't going out we'd be ferrying DC around to do sport most nights and weekends (so it is nice to eat proper meals and get a lie in).

Zenithbear · 08/11/2020 15:05

Yes we are until December then that's it. They can shove their fucked up nonsensical, illogical rules up their arses if they think we're going to play along with this farce after that.

ElsieMc · 08/11/2020 15:05

Yes and my dd had a baby 3 days ago. As I cannot see her at the house, we went a walk with the pram which allowed me to see her. Lots of people out walking in the park in very small groups. My gs took his exercise on his bike and went to a local wood but passed groups of 25-30 lads so god knows what they are telling their parents they are up to. Or perhaps they don't care.

I worry about going shopping but went out today and it was all quite relaxed other than an older guy in M and S who decided to "rest" on my trolley. But he said it was ok because he had sanitised so there you go.

VinylDetective · 08/11/2020 15:07

We live in the area with the lowest infection rate in the country. We’re social distancing, wearing masks in shops and that’s it.

CarryOnWalking · 08/11/2020 15:09

Yes, apart from occasionally chatting (briefly) in a group of more than 2 when dog walking.

Todaytomorrow09 · 08/11/2020 15:10

We following guidelines. Kids at school we both WFH.
But I don’t live near any family if I did I probably would pop over to see Dad etc I’m missing them a lot currently- I haven’t seen them since beginning of August (first time since last Christmas) & have no idea if I’ll see them again this year :(
It’s frustrating my Mum has had a serious operation couldn’t obviously see her before it and still can’t.

ginsparkles · 08/11/2020 15:10

Following the rules here. Have only been out to work, school run and to take the dog for a walk. I can understand your feelings but ultimately we can only worry about what we are doing and hope others are being sensible.

ivykaty44 · 08/11/2020 15:10

Im working and following the rules

have met up for walks with one other person on may own.

got takeaway coffee today

been shopping yesterday

had video chat with friend last night

its not difficult to follow the rules

Branleuse · 08/11/2020 15:10

Mostly following the rules tbh. The only ones I have broken is when I let my son meet up with someone from his class outside of school and I let a friend of mine who is currently homeless in to use the loo and to change her clothes. We had a cup of coffee, but we socially distanced.
I was letting her stay here and there before lockdown but LD has meant I cant anymore and of course all the homeless facilities are closed since march, so its tricky.

unicornparty · 08/11/2020 15:11

I'm following the rules to the letter. I'm in an area with a very low number of cases and don't know anyone that's had it but I'm still sticking to the rules.
I'm a total rule follower and if this continues then I'm happy that in my mind I've done everything I could to get us out of this.

EstuaryBird · 08/11/2020 15:12

Lockdown One I followed them to the letter. Did not leave home from 15th March until mid July, all shopping delivered, didn’t see anyone except DH 😳.

This time I don’t feel the same. I won’t do anything majorly stupid but today I did meet 2 friends for our Sunday hike. We did travel in separate cars and we did take a harder, less popular trail, but it’s something that I really just don’t feel prepared to give up....it does all 3 of us a lot more good than it does harm.

PurpleDaisies · 08/11/2020 15:13

I was letting her stay here and there before lockdown but LD has meant I cant anymore and of course all the homeless facilities are closed since march, so its tricky.

I don’t think anyone would have a problem with a homeless friend staying. I’m sure there’s provision in the rules for emergency situations like that. Couldn’t she be in a bubble with you?

DevonBird9 · 08/11/2020 15:16

No, it's all getting ridiculous as PP has said.