AIBU people flashing for you to pull out in front of them

[Georgeoftheinternet]

I’ve only been driving in the U.K. for a few years and when I lived overseas everyone followed the strict rules.

The U.K. is different and one thing that annoys me is when you are pulling out of a side road and people flash you to pull out in front of them.

Firstly, if I miss read the flashing of lights/hand gesture and crash into them, it’s my fault.

Secondly, the car behind them can’t see what they are doing and could hit them. There is the chance my car could get his by this impact. I could also be the driver behind and no pay attention for a split second and crash into them.

Thirdly, it’s often pointless and not doing a good turn. For example today I wanted to turn right and a car was driving from my left. He flashed me to come out and there was an empty road (just one car behind them). How is it beneficial to me to save a few second but also maybe cause a crash.

The only thing I hate is when people let you out but DON'T flash or it's a sun y day and they do some pithy little hand signal. I can't see you do that mate, will you please flash otherwise I'm gonna think you're taking your time!

I hate this. Especially when I'm a pedestrian and the road is clear apart from them. If they weren't pissing around flashing and waving I'd have been able to cross just as quickly once they'd passed. If Im driving I often ignore them/pretend not to have seen them if they're being idiotic.

The only exception, as others have said, is in a long queue of slow moving traffic where drivers are letting cars filter in one at a time.

Is is some sort of 'hero' thing?

grassgreenthisside. I absolutely agree. It’s a kind gesture, I used to live in a place where you could turn right on red. Different countries different customs ...see how that works op.

If your so under confident driving in road with traffic that someone letting you go is seen as a negative then get off the road

This, 100%. ExMIL used to panic when she saw cones as it meant having to maybe do something different, like come to temporary traffic lights. I always thought she shouldn't be driving if she's so easily spooked.

Honestly wonder why women drivers get stick, absolutely pathetic Honestly misogynists, absolutely pathetic.

@flaviaritt

Sometimes they’re just making a judgement - they might think you look like pulling out anyway and are indicating they aren’t going to continue. And the car behind them should be far enough behind them to stop.

Ah right I never thought about it like that.

It annoys me too.

I'm looking way behind the car that's suddenly stopped for the gap in the traffic that will allow me to pull out safely. Their stopping often just delays me as I then have to refocus in front of me and decide whether or not it's safe to proceed. Had they just carried on I'd probably be able to quickly slot in behind them.

@Newmumatlast

if you're so concerned, you do realise you don't have to pull out because someone is flashing you.. right?

I don’t, you know that right.

I think letting people out in heavy traffic is fine. If you're being let out obviously STILL CHECK. I was behind a car who waited for a lorry to pull out as they couldn't have got round them otherwise. They didn't flash, just waited. The lorry went without checking the other side and almost crashed. Pretty much all driving is common sense. Never trust another driver.

It mostly happens when they're in slow moving or heavy traffic and your chance of getting out is slim, they're turning and it's easier for them for you to be out of the way or if you're pulled out too far and obstructing the road by being over the line. It's an important thing though because sometimes your only chance of getting out with half an hour is if someone let's you out.

You should be paying attention to the car in front of you when you're driving.

@Alexandernevermind

It keeps the traffic moving, especially in the morning and spreads goodwill - If someone lets you out you are more likely to let someone else out. Cars should not be driving so close that they could crash into the one in front if they slightly slow down, and please do make sure you pay full attention when you are driving, so that you don't hit anyone!

As described in the original post the road was clear. Of course no one plans on hitting anyone but it happens. Drive normally

@WitchQueenofDarkness

It annoys me too.

I'm looking way behind the car that's suddenly stopped for the gap in the traffic that will allow me to pull out safely. Their stopping often just delays me as I then have to refocus in front of me and decide whether or not it's safe to proceed. Had they just carried on I'd probably be able to quickly slot in behind them.

Exactly.

I hate drivers slowing down at islands or non pelican/zebra crossing points to let me and my children cross. I'm trying to teach my autistic 9yr old and the younger one road safety and to judge traffic. This does not help at all. They won't know which car will slow and let them past and which won't if it's not at a crossing. Just let me reach them the rules of the road/role of pedestrians

@GlummyMcGlummerson

You're really overthinking this.

Letting people out is a nice courtesy, I don't think it should be stopped in the U.K. just because it doesn't happen abroad.

Also I'm confused re your point about the car behind them - if the car in front of you stops, you don't keep going and say "oh well you see officer it's because I couldn't see the front of the car, so despite him stopping I decided to carry on going".

It’s more dangerous than courtesy. Courtesy is giving someone the space to go down a tight country road where only one car can pass. Making up road rules and going common sense thinking is just foolish.

Referring the car stopping behind the driver flashing - has two elements.
If the car flashing gets rear ended and I’ve pulled out in front the flashing car, I could get hit by the flashing car.
The road where this happens often to me is in a hill so cars can see far along the road. People do judge the road by what’s in front of the car in front, so a car might have a monetary loss of concentration on the road. Obviously shouldn’t be driving so close/without due car but it’s how brains work.

@frontlegsofacow

I hate drivers slowing down at islands or non pelican/zebra crossing points to let me and my children cross. I'm trying to teach my autistic 9yr old and the younger one road safety and to judge traffic. This does not help at all. They won't know which car will slow and let them past and which won't if it's not at a crossing. Just let me reach them the rules of the road/role of pedestrians

Yes what’s the rules regarding pedestrians? I wouldn’t give you space to cross the road (unless there was slow moving traffic). However what if I was about to turn into a side road, the pedestrians don’t get right of way?

Really what are the chances of a flashing car being rear ended?! I've never seen that happen - and it could happen at any point in the road.

I think a good reason for flashing is if you're going into a tight road and they're waiting to come out. Sometimes it's load easier for them to come out if you wanna go in IYSWIM

I got a comment after passing my driving test that I did well to resist the lure of another driver flashing me. I'd have failed if I'd taken the offer.

@grassgreenthisside

Threads like this worry me about people on the road

If your so under confident driving in road with traffic that someone letting you go is seen as a negative then get off the road

It's a judgment call on both sides. If the person flashing is letting you go it's out kindness 99% of the time.

If I'm sat behind someone who is ignoring the chance to be let through then I'd be beeping at them

Honestly wonder why women drivers get stick, absolutely pathetic

I’m confident driving on the road which is why I stick to the speed limits, follow what my driving instructor and common sense is telling me. No way am I going to drive where my car insurance is affected in a crash because another driver thinks they should dictate what I should and shouldn’t be doing to “save” three seconds.

If people want to be kind stick to acts that don’t involve me reading their mind and putting my car insurance/safety at risk. It’s also vulnerable for fraudulent insurance claims, especially if it’s a work van or posh car. There is nothing kind. It’s kind to let people pull out in slow moving traffic, of course I’m grateful for that, but empty roads no.

I live in South Central Scotland. My sister lives in London. On a recent trip up she was astounded how courteous other drivers were - letting how out at junctions etc. I think it's a location thing.

Generally I dont like it, unless its busy and youd have no chance of getting out otherwise.

I'm suspicious of people doing it since it was one of the "crash for cash" methods people use. Flash to let someone out, and then claim you pulled out in from of them...

You can fail your driving test if you pull out when a driver has flashed you on.

I had a car written off once because I pulled out when I’d been flashed - I don’t do it now unless the traffic is crawling and I can see the traffic behind the car that’s flashed me out.

It doesn’t make me a pathetic women driver just one who is aware that there’s at least as many idiots with driving licenses as there are idiots in the general population so why would I rely on their instructions to keep me safe whilst driving

@JamMakingWannaBe

I live in South Central Scotland. My sister lives in London. On a recent trip up she was astounded how courteous other drivers were - letting how out at junctions etc. I think it's a location thing.

Yes I’ve heard London drivers are bad. But if they don’t flash drivers in fast moving traffic it sounds great haha

What I really can’t stand is when I’m clearly turning right, and somebody flashes you on... disregarding the other lane of traffic that is STILL MOVING, AND NO, I DO NOT FANCY DEATH TODAY, THANKS.

Yes this is what I don’t like! You can’t make the decision for another lane of moving traffic.

@BanjoStarz

You can fail your driving test if you pull out when a driver has flashed you on.

I had a car written off once because I pulled out when I’d been flashed - I don’t do it now unless the traffic is crawling and I can see the traffic behind the car that’s flashed me out.

It doesn’t make me a pathetic women driver just one who is aware that there’s at least as many idiots with driving licenses as there are idiots in the general population so why would I rely on their instructions to keep me safe whilst driving

S.h.e.i.l.a.s w.h.e.e.l.s

I hate this too. I was in a car accident as a child where someone pulled out and hit us after being ‘flashed’ to pull out and cross into our lane. Whilst the flasher was ‘letting them go’, the road wasn’t clear and it gave them false confidence that they could just pull out. Straight into the side of our car

Insurance were very clear they had acted on an unauthorised signal. It’s not worth the risk or hassle.