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Original poster

Verbally attacked for not wearing a mask

977 replies

8catsaremycoven · 21/10/2020 20:24

Wow, had a great experience in Lidl today - I was verbally abused and intimidated by a bloke in his 40s for not wearing a mask.

I'm minding my own business, choosing some fruit for DHS when random angry bloke walks past and hisses "You should be wearing a mask ". He doesn't stop and ask me directly why I'm not wearing a mask, just walks past me and says it in an undertone.

I catch up with him because he's browsing and tell him I'm exempt because I'm asthmatic. Apparently anyone can claim to be exempt and it's my personal fault that people are dying?! I told him that I wished that I was able to wear a mask to protect myself if nothing else, he just carried on ranting at me. No security guards in the store, other shoppers just stood and watched. I ended up crying in frustration and walking away.

I can't wear a mask because of my asthma but I also suffer from PTSD because an XH put a pillow over my face and raped me.

Am I expected to explain everything to anyone?

YABU - get over everything, risk a major asthma attack and wear a mask

YANBU - asthma is enough to excuse me from wearing a mask let alone my other reasons, which I don't feel I should have to explain to anyone

Bring it on, I'm sure someone is going to roast me but I truly hope that you're going to be behind me.

I left the shop shaking and in tears

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Dangermouseis42now · 22/10/2020 12:45

@Marisishidinginmyattic

Switch to online shopping or click and collect.

This bugs me when people say this as if online shopping always goes perfectly, nothing arrives damaged or dated, and everything was in stock 😂

But if your asthma is so severe you "cannot breathe when wearing a paper mask or will have severe asthma attack by wearing one" (which we know is not as prevalent as people claim), it doesn't make sense to risk exposure going shopping in supermarkets. Aldi's is not known for having anywhere near spacious aisles and can be crowded . It's a strange choice to have made

Shielded group are still getting free online deliveries , many with no minimum spend, from many supermarkets until end of Oct / Nov.

Online shopping deliveries is not perfect but if it's on the shelf it'll be picked and delivered , the limited stock snd missing items - particularly at the start- was due to items not being available at the time. Yes some of replacements have been funny.

People can get refunds if short dates , wrong item, snd don't pay for what's missing, so can use that money to ask one of the many Covid volunteer groups that are set up in every area and still running - for free- to go pick up the items they have missing or went out of date too early, a bit later in the week for them.

Do some MNers on here not appreciate all the emergency planning and COVID support that is out there that your regional health services, local borough councils, local authorities and social care services set up in our emergency planning groups??

People who choose to go into crowded shops or indoor places during busy times without masks when they are vulnerable are making decisions at risk to themselves and others. ^^ There's a great deal of difference from taking someone out shopping who has LD or SEN for stimulation and impossible for them to understand wearing a mask, and those with capacity deciding whether they are exempt or not and to put themselves and others at risk.

U.K. guidelines were written too widely snd have been misused by a proportion of people. People are required to wear masks if they are able to, not if they just don't want to or find it uncomfortable initially. Few people in reality are medically or psychologically unable to wear the lightweight paper disposable masks. We should be seeing very few people without masks

WouldBeGood · 22/10/2020 12:47

I genuinely think it’s the people who are so terrified of a non mask wearer in a shop who should be shopping online.

OwlBeThere · 22/10/2020 12:47

if you read the OP, he merely told her she should be wearing a mask whilst walking past

Which the law is very clear about that you should not challenge people. However he did then shout at her when she told him she was exempt so...

So hardly harassment or verbal attack

It could be a verbal attack.

Let's not even comment on the OP not merely picking up fruits but choosing them - who doesn't like people lingering over fruits when they don't even bother with mask

But you did comment on it Hmm but she is allowed to pick fruits

Maybe the man shouldn't have said anything

He definitely shouldn’t have said anything.

He probably would be better off sneezing or unfortunately having a coughing fit near the OP, having to move his own mask whilst doing that.If the OP is feeling so safe mask-free, they won't be that bothered will they?

The OP never said she’d felt safe, she probably doesn’t feel safe. My daughter who can’t wear a mask doesn’t feel safe because she has as a side effect of her PTSD trauma also developed OCD. but that still doesn’t mean she can tolerate the mask. If you could be privy uk the nights where she cries herself to sleep because she feels guilty for being unable to tolerate a mask BECAUSE A BOY ASSAULTED HER AT SCHOOL. And she feels that’s her fault, you might try and use your brain and understand that inability to wear a mask doesn’t mean not understand the risks and being just as scared as other people.

PumpkinetChocolat · 22/10/2020 12:48

But none of that matters, as like it or not there are legal exemptions.

more accurately, there is no legal requirement to wear a mask.

If there's no fine, and no requirement to prove you have a reason not to wear one funny that it basically means they are optional. Anyone can say they are exempt. This country is stupid!

Marisishidinginmyattic · 22/10/2020 12:48

Even if they gave everyone who is exempt for a valid serious super duper officially cannot wear a mask reason a piece of medically official paper and a government PIP/ESA style torture test with proof of doing so, it still would not be enough for the moaning bastards.

And why are people going on about hospitals and wearing masks? If you’re exempt elsewhere, you’re exempt there too 😂

PumpkinetChocolat · 22/10/2020 12:52

@WouldBeGood

I genuinely think it’s the people who are so terrified of a non mask wearer in a shop who should be shopping online.
I am not terrified. I am allowed to have an opinion and express just as anyone else. 🤷

I do stick to online shopping anyway, but that has nothing to do with the pandemic. Grin. I am just as much as risk taking the tube anyway.

I do find it very embarrassing that some people are so selfish they are making others life a misery, people who are at risk but have to get out sometimes - and really, why shouldn't they? Why should the selfish ones push others to be locked inside?

PumpkinetChocolat · 22/10/2020 12:53

And why are people going on about hospitals and wearing masks? If you’re exempt elsewhere, you’re exempt there too

because people who are so called "exempt" manage to wear a mask when they really have to... that's why.

Dangermouseis42now · 22/10/2020 12:53

[quote Dowser]@ArcheryAnnie
And I’ll ask the same of you.

Nobody has the LEGAL right to challenge any non snotty rag wearer
Because if you do your ate breaking the law

Law trumps your ‘perceived‘ right Every day.

Look it up.

Honestly some people are as thick as mince[/quote]
🙄🙄

Read the OP, he did not challenge her nor demand her medical details, she approached him later . You're adding in details that didn't happen.

And you misunderstand the legislation and guidance.
People who have that knowledge have patiently explained earlier, so maybe read back the thread a bit.

BamboozledandBefuddled · 22/10/2020 12:53

And why are people going on about hospitals and wearing masks? If you’re exempt elsewhere, you’re exempt there too 😂

The comments about hospitals are really showing people"s ignorance.

Marisishidinginmyattic · 22/10/2020 12:53

People can get refunds if short dates , wrong item, snd don't pay for what's missing, so can use that money to ask one of the many Covid volunteer groups that are set up in every area and still running - for free- to go pick up the items they have missing or went out of date too early, a bit later in the week for them.

Refunds don’t feed hungry people. Not everyone can access COVID volunteer groups. There’s nothing like that round here now lockdown has ended. Lots of people are isolated with no family, friends, or neighbours to trust to help them. Some people’s medical conditions may affect their ability to even have a stranger bring them something. It’s one thing having a staff member come to your door at a guaranteed time with food that has been kept cold etc. It’s another to have a random person bring you it. I’d choose going to the shop quick over that every single time.

People really lack in imagination when it comes to disability.

Marisishidinginmyattic · 22/10/2020 12:55

@PumpkinetChocolat

And why are people going on about hospitals and wearing masks? If you’re exempt elsewhere, you’re exempt there too

because people who are so called "exempt" manage to wear a mask when they really have to... that's why.

They don’t have to wear them in hospitals. Exempt people don’t “manage to wear a mask when they have to” at hospital because... drum roll... THEY DONT HAVE TO.
Sockwomble · 22/10/2020 12:55

because people who are so called "exempt" manage to wear a mask when they really have to... that's why."

Except they don't. Maybe you should go and live in one of those countries where disability doesn't exist because I think you would feel more at home there.

saymynames · 22/10/2020 12:58

If masks were protecting the wearer people would magically tolerate them and no longer be "exempt"

This

Goosefoot · 22/10/2020 12:59

I really wonder, when we come out of all of this, if people's perception of the dangers of illness and the "right" not to be exposed will be changed to the point that we will see social disapproval and restrictions for other potentially communicable conditions that up until now we've simply accepted as part of life.

Saltandstars · 22/10/2020 13:00

Name change check

OwlBeThere · 22/10/2020 13:04

@Dangermouseis42now there is nothing locally in place for shielding people where I live anymore. It’s almost impossible to get a delivery slot for the few supermarkets that do deliver to us. Luckily I am able to shop for my daughter or I genuinely think she might starve. It’s not as easy as ‘just stay home’ for a lot of people.

ArcheryAnnie · 22/10/2020 13:05

[quote Dowser]@ArcheryAnnie
And I’ll ask the same of you.

Nobody has the LEGAL right to challenge any non snotty rag wearer
Because if you do your ate breaking the law

Law trumps your ‘perceived‘ right Every day.

Look it up.

Honestly some people are as thick as mince[/quote]
And yet you can't bring any actual evidence that this is breaking the law. Loudly stating something is so, does not make it so.

I will continue to ask people who are near me to put their masks on properly. I have been - and will continue to be - polite, but I will carry on doing so, because it's my health and my life at risk from those who don't follow the rules.

PumpkinetChocolat · 22/10/2020 13:05

It reminds me of kids going to great length to cheat at school. It would take a lot less effort to learn the lesson and be done with it.

It would take you a lot less effort to wear a mask than trying to justify your choice of not wearing one.

People who are REALLY unable to have oxygen, to have dental treatments etc.. do exist, but they are much rarer than the masks refusers pretend they are. You know that.

OwlBeThere · 22/10/2020 13:06

@PumpkinetChocolat
because people who are so called "exempt" manage to wear a mask when they really have to... that's why

No, they don’t.

Dangermouseis42now · 22/10/2020 13:06

@Sockwomble

"Anyone can wear a mask 😂 that's the point. Some just chose not to.

Exemptions seem to miraculously disappear in hospital of all places!"

Ds is exempt from wearing a mask at all medical appointments. Your lack of education and life experience is showing there.

That's a bit of a jump! and rather ignorant comment to a PP

Just because your son is genuinely exempt for hospital and elsewhere.

If you RTFT you will see medical professionals saying exactly what that poster said!

A disproportionate number of people are claiming exemption to mask wearing and they do indeed manage to wear them in hospital fir clinic appointments and tests.

Spikeyball · 22/10/2020 13:08

Are some people so unbelievably stupid that they think absolutely everyone can wear a mask because it seems there are a few of those on here.

ArcheryAnnie · 22/10/2020 13:09

The few who have come in not wearing masks have largely been the ones who don't lean over the counter and will sanitise their hands.

This has not been my experience, Stefoscope.

Dangermouseis42now · 22/10/2020 13:12

[quote OwlBeThere]@Dangermouseis42now there is nothing locally in place for shielding people where I live anymore. It’s almost impossible to get a delivery slot for the few supermarkets that do deliver to us. Luckily I am able to shop for my daughter or I genuinely think she might starve. It’s not as easy as ‘just stay home’ for a lot of people.[/quote]
You need to go on your borough council or adult health care department websites for Covid community support or look on

nhsvolunteerresponders.org.uk/

as they are still there and running, it's scaled down since shielding paused but still National and still available.

Sockwomble · 22/10/2020 13:14

"That's a bit of a jump! and rather ignorant comment to a PP"

That poster has already said in a previous post that everyone can wear a mask. There lies the ignorance.

turnitonagain · 22/10/2020 13:15

But if your asthma is so severe you "cannot breathe when wearing a paper mask or will have severe asthma attack by wearing one" (which we know is not as prevalent as people claim), it doesn't make sense to risk exposure going shopping in supermarkets.

Exactly. OP is at high risk of additional complications if she catches the virus. Not sure how this becomes an issue of my rights. If I had severe asthma and PTSD associated with being held down in a bed, I would be doing anything possible to avoid an illness that could lead to a hospital stay. Click and collect seems a minor inconvenience in comparison.

Especially as the chance of randoms making rude comments is high for the foreseeable future and that’s quite triggering to OP.

Avoidance certainly is the least resistance option here.