Verbally attacked for not wearing a mask

[8catsaremycoven]

Wow, had a great experience in Lidl today - I was verbally abused and intimidated by a bloke in his 40s for not wearing a mask.

I'm minding my own business, choosing some fruit for DHS when random angry bloke walks past and hisses "You should be wearing a mask ". He doesn't stop and ask me directly why I'm not wearing a mask, just walks past me and says it in an undertone.

I catch up with him because he's browsing and tell him I'm exempt because I'm asthmatic. Apparently anyone can claim to be exempt and it's my personal fault that people are dying?! I told him that I wished that I was able to wear a mask to protect myself if nothing else, he just carried on ranting at me. No security guards in the store, other shoppers just stood and watched. I ended up crying in frustration and walking away.

I can't wear a mask because of my asthma but I also suffer from PTSD because an XH put a pillow over my face and raped me.

Am I expected to explain everything to anyone?

YABU - get over everything, risk a major asthma attack and wear a mask

YANBU - asthma is enough to excuse me from wearing a mask let alone my other reasons, which I don't feel I should have to explain to anyone

Bring it on, I'm sure someone is going to roast me but I truly hope that you're going to be behind me.

I left the shop shaking and in tears

It is still true that most disabled vulnerable to Covid are also mask exempt.

Do you have any studies which back this up?

@PurpleDaisies

Different clothes yes, but still clothes. For your comparison to work, we'd have to be ok with people wearing no clothes in certain situation.

They still aren't allowed to walk round naked, at least in public. So the requirement to be covered remains, but with modifications to make it as easy as possible.

In the same way, a person can try different masks to find one there most bearable, or a scarf, mask supports, or even a big bubble over their head (they exist now!). If visors worked, them too. But the requirement of covering your mouth and nose remains, just as the requirement to cover genitals does in clothing.

[quote Thespottytortoise]@PurpleDaisies

Different clothes yes, but still clothes. For your comparison to work, we'd have to be ok with people wearing no clothes in certain situation.

They still aren't allowed to walk round naked, at least in public. So the requirement to be covered remains, but with modifications to make it as easy as possible.

In the same way, a person can try different masks to find one there most bearable, or a scarf, mask supports, or even a big bubble over their head (they exist now!). If visors worked, them too. But the requirement of covering your mouth and nose remains, just as the requirement to cover genitals does in clothing.[/quote]
This analogy doesn’t work because there is no requirement for people to wear masks if exempt. None.

Except what people keep making up themselves.

And if we say that maskless people (without trying to minimise these numbers) can go into places freely, does that effectively force the shielded to stay away too?

It does force many shielded to stay away, and that's clearly the decision that whoever is making the legislation has come to make. It's being badly skewed by all the arseholes who don't have an exemption, but who aren't wearing masks anyway (or wearing them wrongly).

I think if only people who had exemptions were the ones going around maskless, then this really wouldn't be an issue, because the numbers wouldn't be that large. It's because so many people aren't bothering at all, and there's no comeback, that it is an issue.

(Though there were police at Kings Cross station checking people without masks the other day.)

My research shows that a lot of people on this thread are heartless, stupid, fake rule making fuckers.

The OP is exempt. That is the law. If you don’t like the the law then maybe you should be the ones to stay indoors.

@8catsaremycoven

I did not chase after him, I continued to do my shopping and as I passed him said (in a PA tone that matched his) I'm exempt. He then decided to raise his voice to me and started his rant. I was at least 3m further up the aisle when he started.

I fully appreciate that I could have ignored him, but he had no right to comment in the first place. Why is it ok for a complete stranger to comment? Approach me, in a SD way, and ask me if you're really that desperate to engage. Otherwise be grateful that you can wear a mask, stay away from me (as I am from you) and just do your shopping 👍🏼

Unless of course this week's "Middle of Lidl " special offers include "Vent your mask rage on a total stranger without knowing their history "👍🏼

He has no right to comment and it’s not okay for a complete stranger to make comments to you like that. He didn’t want to know that you were exempt or why you were exempt. He wanted to use you as an excuse to let out some of his rage about people not wearing masks as soon as he’d spotted you and it’s shit and unfair but as soon as you bit back, he saw his opening and went for it.

There are people like this everywhere and there were people like this pre COVID who wander around in life waiting for a chance or excuse to kick off. All you can do is ignore them and not engage. Yes, it’s shit and unfair and why should you etc. But you’d be in a lot better mood right now if you had ignored him.

I always think back to that video that came out earlier on in the year of the massive man raging and screaming at the girl in the subway/underground station because she didn’t have a mask. He didn’t ask her why or check she was exempt, he just full on rage screamed right in her face. He didn’t give a shit, he just wanted to let it all out on her. I treat every person who comments under their breath about masks like they have the potential to do that and ignore them. It’s the safest option.

Sometimes you have to choose safety over being right or having your say.

@WouldBeGood

My research shows that a lot of people on this thread are heartless, stupid, fake rule making fuckers.

The OP is exempt. That is the law. If you don’t like the the law then maybe you should be the ones to stay indoors.

The heartless thing goes both ways, though. Many people very reasonably have extreme trauma connected with covid. Many other people are callously flouting the rules. It's reasonable for people to have an exemption, and it's also reasonable for other people to ask, when in confined spaces such as shops, for people near them to put on a mask (and then accept it when they are told the other person has an exemption).

@ArcheryAnnie how many times?

The op is not flouting the rules.

It is not acceptable to question someone. If you don’t like the law of the land then don’t go out to places where people are peacefully obeying it.

there is no requirement for people to wear masks if exempt.

hopefully that will change.

The country financially cannot bear other lockdowns, at some point we need alternative solutions. HEAVY fines for all rule breakers, masks refusers would be a million time more efficient and cost effective.

There's no way in hell the UK is the only country with a population physically unable to wear a mask, it's ridiculous. Read forums from abroad, there's no such drama and nonsense. People don't like masks and might be very unhappy about wearing one, fine, but no one needs to make up vapours and sensitivity.

Every time I read a thread like this, and see how utterly heartless and hateful people are, it makes me give less of a toss about following any rules to protect society. Society is full of cunts apparently.

@PurpleDaisies

It's the law indeed, that makes exemptions, but law and morality don't always align do they?

If the law suddenly required everyone to wear a mask without exception, then do you truly think everyone who is saying now 'its the law, tough' would be also saying that to those people who might end up stuck at home. No, some people would say it's unfair, want the law changing etc.

I will follow the law. I will not criticise a person for not wearing a mask, as they are exempt by the law. It doesn't mean I feel the law has got it right.im entitled to that view.

@WouldBeGood

My research shows that a lot of people on this thread are heartless, stupid, fake rule making fuckers.

The OP is exempt. That is the law. If you don’t like the the law then maybe you should be the ones to stay indoors.

.....would that be the mask/face wearing 'heartless, stupid, fake rule making fuckers'???

@MaxNormal

Every time I read a thread like this, and see how utterly heartless and hateful people are, it makes me give less of a toss about following any rules to protect society. Society is full of cunts apparently.

Wholeheartedly agree

@peachescariad yep, if they don’t like the law then stay home 🤷🏻‍♀️

makes me give less of a toss about following any rules to protect society

the definition of masks refusers then
🤷

They are hypocritical, protected because others have to wear masks, but refuse to do the same as it doesn't affect them. Or so they think.

I would be frankly ashamed, you just have to look at young children with masks, elderly people with glasses (masks and glasses are a pain in the ass frankly) who are at risk.
You have to be a special kind of individual to parade around without a mask because you think you are superior.

Do you know what my main bugbear anout masks is? People are seemingly fine piling into a busy supermarket, for example, because they're wearing masks despite the fact that, often, they're less than 1m apart. No one is questioning the efficacy of people wearing a mask in this situation but are jumping on someone without one who still may be taking all the other precautions, such as handwashing, personal space.

I actually think we were safer before when we didn't wear masks because we were more conscious of space rather than face and shops were compelled to limit numbers. The fact that all this has suddenly changed isn't being questioned , along with the big financial machines, but individuals are, is very telling

[quote WouldBeGood]@ArcheryAnnie how many times?

The op is not flouting the rules.

It is not acceptable to question someone. If you don’t like the law of the land then don’t go out to places where people are peacefully obeying it.[/quote]
The point is too many people are not peacefully obeying the law of the land, and putting others at risk.

Like I said, if everybody obeyed the current legislation, I don't think the people with exemptions would be a problem, but so many unexempt are not.

[quote WouldBeGood]@peachescariad yep, if they don’t like the law then stay home 🤷🏻‍♀️[/quote]
I'd love to see all medical personal, all frontline workers, teachers, shop workers, you make the list, all people you rely on every single day saying fuck it, I am staying home if others refuse to wear a mask.

@8catsaremycoven

That’s just appalling.
I haven’t rtft but these people who have taken it upon themselves to be the eyes of the government
They’re as bad as the snitches and certain twitchers.
Why anyone thinks a bit of snotty rag is going to do anything I really don’t know.

I wish they’d mind their own business.
Are their lives so impoverished they have to get their jollies by picking on someone vulnerable.

Don’t let such a sad sack get to you.
Masks should be optional.
I’m in Tenerife at the moment, yes people are wearing them, u Dee their chins, noses out, on their arms ..theres about 20 per cent wearing them properly.
That might be the 20 per cent that have a condition that means they feel safer wearing them.
Most people pull them Down to talk to you.
Everyone I’ve spoken to of all nationalities agree it’s a farce.

@WouldBeGood

Kids with chicken pox are not legally obliged to stay at home whilst infectious. But morally it's a bit crap if they wander round a supermarket, play in the park, go to soft play, see friends without telling them.

When you pose a risk to someone else, even if the law does require you to keep your distance, morality and politeness should. At least as far as is possible.

@PurpleDaisies

Some people may find it distressing to wear clothes, for example, but I've never seen someone walk round nude because of this.

Children with autism are allowed to wear different school uniform because of sensory issues. Society makes adaptations for those who cannot fit the general rules. You just haven’t noticed.

no, theyre really not unless they have proof that its impossible for them on a sensory level and its been heavily discussed with the SEN team and allowed by the head

@PumpkinetChocolat no, but they won’t as most people aren’t dickheads who make up their own rules to bully and torment others

And, yes, I wear a mask when I’m out before that starts

I think asking others to put on a mask is hardly "bullying" and "tormenting".

This isn't some random law. This is to stop us infecting each other with a serious and potentially fatal disease.

One more time, @ArcheryAnnie

Whatever your peculiar interpretation of this is, what you are saying is NOT the law.

Wear your mask and leave other people alone.