Mum sending pictures of my DD

[Mommabear20]

AIBU to ask my mum to stop sending pictures of my DD to her friends?
DD is 18 weeks old, I had some errands to run today so asked her to come watch her while I popped out. She was thrilled to! When I came back she said she'd been good as gold and she'd got some videos and pictures of her laughing that she'd sent to her sister (don't mind this as she's family and I send her pictures myself) and a friend of hers from work that I've never met. Didn't think much of it initially as was busy putting shopping away while also dealing with my over excited dogs. But now I'm thinking about it, it bugs me that she'd do that. We haven't posted a single picture of our DD, including her scan pictures, on social media as we don't know who is seeing them, which she knows!

Am I being unreasonable or is she out of line?

I don't know why people mind about this. By the time you have your third, you'll be begging people to even acknowledge that you have had a baby

Judge not dye!! Wtf!

Massive case of pfb going on here - she's not plastering it all over fb or similar , I feel you are going to have a stressful few years if this is any indication this is how things are going to be. Good luck

@Tootletum 😊

It's a baby, they pretty much all look the same anyway. YABU and overly precious.

Ok probably SHRTFF.... in all honesty as PPs have said the friends your DM has sent your child's picture to will probably delete very quickly..... your child is 18 weeks old and will look very different in a few weeks / months time.
The difference between posting on SM to people you don't know and your DM sending privately to people you don't know is that 1. Those people are very very unlikely to do anything anything with your child's photo (other than delete). I don't think your mums friend will post anywhere on SM. And 2. Posting on SM it could be seen by friends of friends of friends and so on. It could be out there to a much larger audience and yes that's why I agree that SM I wouldn't be happy with but sending privately I would be ok with.

You're being a little precious. Yes safeguarding is important but she's just proud of her grandchild. I'd be more concerned if she was posting it on social media tbh.

This wouldn't bother me tbh. She's a happy and proud Granny...

What can anyone do with a picture of an 18 week old baby? What exactly are you afraid of?

My friend sent me pics of her new grandson.... what could I do with them.

Your mum is sending the pics to her friend...
not some crazy psycho....unless I'm missing something.

Do you think your mum's friend will send the pics on to anyone else? Who would be interested in your DD when they don't know you anyway?

Were you hoping to give the exclusive to OK magasine?

Really? More than a little precious. How could it possibly do any harm to anyone and anything except your relationship with your mother?
It’s a baby. Most people know what they look like.

@anothersleeplessone Er, yes I take my children out, and yes everyone has a phone these days but I'd probably notice a random person trying to take pics of my children.

Just because everyone has the ability to take pictures and share them doesn't make the process itself is ok.

The OP is totally right to question the fact that a picture of her child has been sent on to someone she doesn't know.

I don't get your point about family. My family were all fine with my request and understood where I was coming from, and I trust them.

Jeez. I’m sure no one is that bothered about saving a random photo of you baby. Don’t they all look like potatoes at that age anyway. Precious much.

@anothersleeplessone

I wouldn’t like it and you are NOT overreacting or being unreasonable. I’m private. I don’t share any images of myself on the internet. I’d be the same about my children. I’d hate the idea of strangers being sent images of my child (and maybe identifying parts of my home in the background). I can’t imagine doing this to another person either.

You are MASSIVELY overreacting, how would a stranger identify parts of your home? Assuming you don't reside at buck house or 10 Downing Street! 🙄

Address Plate by the front door (the sort that says 10 Plum Tree Lane and that many parents stupidly take pictures of their kids next to on the first day of school ) . Car Reg etc.

I had a friend send me a picture of her baby on the sofa next to a pile of mail that her address could very clearly be seen on. She’d posted it on FB for the world to see.

Totally fine OP.

Just make sure you never leave your house other wise some stranger might make eye contact with your child.

In fact, to be on the safe side, just wear Halloween masks all year round.

mine does this - shes just so proud and happy about her grandchildren - its fine by me!

if it was a post to social media, i would have a different attitude!

One day you will look back at this post and cringe

Your being way to over the top ! Don’t get the issue

What is your concern?

What can someone do with an address?
Everyone has one!!

Tbh as a matter of principle yanbu in that you are the parent and she should respect your wishes. I also wouldn't want randomers having pictures of my child but I expect as pps have said, the people receiving them won't care and it is different to social media

*@anothersleeplessone Er, yes I take my children out, and yes everyone has a phone these days but I'd probably notice a random person trying to take pics of my children.

Just because everyone has the ability to take pictures and share them doesn't make the process itself is ok.

The OP is totally right to question the fact that a picture of her child has been sent on to someone she doesn't know.

I don't get your point about family. My family were all fine with my request and understood where I was coming from, and I trust them.*

You would never know they were taking a photo, don't be ridiculous!

• Plate by the front door (the sort that says 10 Plum Tree Lane and that many parents stupidly take pictures of their kids next to on the first day of school ) . Car Reg etc.

I had a friend send me a picture of her baby on the sofa next to a pile of mail that her address could very clearly be seen on. She’d posted it on FB for the world to see.*

Happens all the time ...... not!

So they have your address and they know you have a baby, but like they see someone walk into a house with a baby. Or they see kids NHS paintings on the windows, or they see trikes and bikes in the garden, so they know they've got kids.

So what?

YABU also If you take your baby in public places or shops they'll most likely be on CCtv you might want to ask them to switch of the cctv as you don't know where the footage will end up.

@anothersleeplessone I would argue it's much less likely that a random person would be taking pics of my kids and me not knowing, than a picture being taken by a relative and passed on, which is what has ACTUALLY happened in the OPs case.

Also, calm the fuck down, why are you being so aggressive with your view?!

@Mommabear20

Okay, so most of you think I'm being precious, but, (&I say this seriously) can someone explain the difference you see in social media posts where you have no control over who sees, saves or shares it and it being sent to strangers (to me and DH) where there is no control over who sees, saves or shares it?

But what do you actually think is going to happen with the pictures? Can you give even one example of what you are so concerned about? As right now it's coming across as a bit hysterical.