To think it's not up to children what a new baby is or isn't called?

[PiccoloPies]

If you were choosing the name of your baby and your existing children hated it, would you change it?

My husband's children don't like the name we've chosen and regularly tell us such and have complained that we should choose something else.

We aren't changing it but AIBU to think most people don't put it down to a family vote when deciding names?

[MJMG2015]

@ShellsAndSunrises

Did you post this a few weeks ago too? If not, there’s a very similar thread from around then which got hundreds of replies.

I wouldn’t let them name the new baby but I’d take their feelings into consideration if I told them the name ahead of time.

I wondered that too. But then figured there are probably lots of people who have SDC that don't like the baby's name

[LaMarschallin]

We didn't go with 1st DD's (18 months old at the time) suggestion for her younger sister:

"Call it 'Spot' ".

She also used to follow me around when I was transporting Spot, with her arms held out and saying encouragingly:
"Catch!"

Didn't take her up on that either

[Boringnamechanging]

Nope they get to name their children whatever they like and you promise to smile and say how nice even if you hate it!

The only people who get a say are the parents.

[Russiansilver]

I really disliked the name my parents were seriously thinking of giving to my brother. I remember begging them not to use it. They didn't and he thanks me to this day! I was 8.

[EssentialHummus]

DD, then 2.5, chose a name for DC2 and announced it to her grandparents without consulting us first. They hadn’t known I was pregnant. That was a brilliant afternoon.

[EssentialHummus]

But no, Yanbu. Though you can borrow DD if you like .

[Dixiechickonhols]

Depends on name. It’s is very similar to husbands children eg if they are John the second and Jane and you are choosing John the third. Or very different eg they are Olivia and James and you like Princess -Chardonnay it will be obvious not full siblings.

[lyralalala]

I think it depends why they hate the name.

DS1 hated one of the names in contention for DD4 because there was a horrible bully in his school (hadn’t bullied him so it wasn’t a connection we made) with the same name and he really, really hated it.

We also ruled out one for DS2 because it turned out it was the same name as DD1 & 2’s Auntie’s dog. They spent a lot of time with their paternal grandparents and Aunt so to them it was very much a dog’s name.

So if they have a reason to dislike it I would absolutely take it into consideration

[lowlandLucky]

No

[Teirsforfears]

What is the name?

[Isadora2007]

I’d at least discuss it. We did with our children who were 8 and 11 when we were having DC3. We all had four names we kind of all agreed on liking and got to rate them 1-4 then the highest one won. So most people’s first or second choice was the winner. No name that anyone hated was on the shortlist. It’s their sibling so they also need to live with the name.

[KenDodd]

I wouldn't let grandparents or other family have a say, the baby's siblings though... I'd let them veto a name they hated. It can be hard for siblings when I new baby comes along, I wouldn't want to add to it.

[FraughtwithGin]

I was 5 and a half when my youngest sibling was born. My mother actually asked me what the baby should be called (she already had 2 middle names) and I told her. So the sibling ended up with 3 names and everybody was happy - although I think my sibling would prefer a different name to the one I chose ;-)

[MootingMirror]

I think it depends. There's a big difference between letting them choose the name and considering their opinion on a name. This harks back to not telling anyone the name before the baby is born. Is there a reason they dislike the name?

[Shinyletsbebadguys]

No , I mean by all means ask suggestions but ve clear the choice ends with you . My dsis wanted to call me Daisy or Rose , both beautiful names but patently not right for me so thank goodness my dm didn't go with those. Frankly Lucifer may have been a better choice for me from her opinion now .

Ds1 suggested Bob the builder , raptorsaur and Bing (and I am definitely not a flop either ) when ds2 was on his way .

They need to understand you are not going to change it , it's nice to discuss but no I wouldn't change it either.

[UsernameSpoosername]

I was 14 when my sister was born, I put forward SO many names desperate for them to like one. They did not 😂 thank god... I was 14 & all the names would be awful now! YANBU!

[gretagreengrapes]

My mum considered a name I hate for my sister (I was 14) and didn't use it because of that reason. It wasn't her final name choice, she shared her shortlist of 3 or 4 with me.

[TwilightSkies]

My second oldest thought he had a say in what I named my youngest. He was an adult at the time. I told him that since he wasn't there at conception then it wasn't none of his damn business and to mind his own

Lovely.

[FreshHorizons]

I don’t know why people discuss it in advance. Far better to wait until the baby is born and simply announce it and then it is all too late.
I was 5 yrs when my brother was born - I didn’t like the name and I don’t now but so what?!

[Nymeriastark1]

No to a family vote. How old are they? 6 year old telling you they hate it fair enough, a 14 year old should know better not to be so rude. I wouldn't give it much thought. Our 3 year old DD doesn't like our names and wants to call her younger sister kristoff.

[SaltAndVinegarSandwiches]

Just like anything I wouldn't give them the final say but I'd probably listen to their point of view. Why do they hate it so much? If it's something children are going to find funny I'd be inclined to go for a different name.

[76ocean]

We were really stuck between two names so did discuss it with our older DC and did actually go with the name they loved. However if we were 100% sure on the name I wouldn't entertain changing it unless the sibling had very valid reasons beyond 'just because'.

[TidyDancer]

How old are they? I would consider their feelings on this I think. Is it a name that they dislike for a reason, or radically different from theirs? Could they choose the middle name(s)?

[IDontLikeZombies]

DC1's suggestion for DC2 was Jesus Tortoise.

[FippertyGibbett]

No, it’s no one’s business but you and dad.