Page 5 | AIBU to buy this romper for a baby girl?

Plmoknijb123 · 2020-10-13T13:04:00+00:00

As above...please help settle a lighthearted disagreement between me and my friend!

Conquered · 13/10/2020 16:05

If you want it, buy it

Lweji · 13/10/2020 16:05

Just out of curiosity, why are so many people against gendered clothing?

I think the important question is why are so many people still reinforcing gendered clothing? Particularly for children, whose bodies are virtually the same shape.

MaryShelley1818 · 13/10/2020 16:08

It's a traditional boys outfit so unless you know the friend is ok with that I would choose something else. It wouldn't bother me but we're all different and if there's nothing wrong with dressing your boy in pink sparkly outfits, there's nothing wrong with dressing your girl in them either.

SirVixofVixHall · 13/10/2020 16:10

Well I would not have put my baby daughters in that, as they didn’t suit blue, and I wouldn’t have wanted them with soldiers plastered across their fronts. Dd1 did have a very similar romper in green with little dogs on the smocking, and one in red with boats.
I would not buy that as a gift for a baby girl as there is too much risk that it wouldn’t be worn. Something more neutral on it, like an animal , would be better if you want something obviously unisex. I bought things from the boys’ and girls’ ranges for my dds, depending on what I liked and what colours they had, but it did annoy me that my MIl only bought them things from the boys’ ranges, I think she would have preferred a grandson.

MaryShelley1818 · 13/10/2020 16:11

@Lweji

Just out of curiosity, why are so many people against gendered clothing?

I think the important question is why are so many people still reinforcing gendered clothing? Particularly for children, whose bodies are virtually the same shape.

Because they like them? Individual choice and individual tastes. I'm due a DD in January and she'll be wearing a mix of mostly hand me downs from her big brother but I will no doubt buy a few pretty dresses at some point. I hate pink/frills/bows but lots of people like them. Why does it matter?

Sunshineandflipflops · 13/10/2020 16:12

@AwaAnBileYerHeid

It looks like it was meant for a boy but you could put it on either boy or girl I reckon.

Just out of curiosity, why are so many people against gendered clothing?

because you are forcing out dated and life limiting expectations on children by telling them they can't wear clothes that are a certain colour or style because of what is between their legs. It starts with clothes as a baby and goes on to toys/hobbies/jobs, which is why women generally earn a lot less than men, because the top earning and powerful jobs are not for women, they should be having a babies and cleaning the house while the men get on with that stuff, and why so many men suffer with mental health problems, because they are told they should 'man up' and not express emotions because that's for women.

It's not just about clothing it's about the gendering of everything and limiting people because of what is between their legs.

Brefugee · 13/10/2020 16:17

How is it for boys only. Get your friend to describe it.
And then ignore her.

CleverCatty · 13/10/2020 16:19

@mistermagpie

I think it's horrible but beyond that I agree with you.

I have two boys and a girl, they are all close in age and the girl is only a baby. Naturally (or maybe not naturally to everyone?) she wears a lot of hand me downs which are therefore literally 'boys' clothes. In reality this means is a LOT of navy or bright colours and pretty much no pink. She also has a footmuff on her pram which is both blue and covered in dinosaurs.

The sheer number of people who comment on this is ridiculous. She's a very bald baby too and I'm constantly told by family to 'put a bow on her or everyone with think she's a boy!'. Well so what if they do?! She doesn't care, she still has a vagina and people who know us know she's a girl anyway.

There is also a lot of unpleasant subtext in comments along the lines of now I've 'finally got my girl' I should be showing her off.

I really dont get it. I'm definitely a woman and I don't have to go round dressed in pink with bows on my head to prove it. Why do people treat babies like that? It really annoys me.

mistermagpie

showing my age here but in the early 1970s when I was born my DM wasn't pleased that there was only pink, blue, white, lemon or green (all pastels) in terms of baby grows and clothes for me.

So she dyed my baby grows which were white in orange, purple, red, etc - and knitted me the only thing she knitted baby wise which was an orange green and yellow striped romper suit! I did actually have some pale pink and white stuff too! Oh and some baby smocks which she made and also Victorian baby clothes.

luckily this was the 1970s - but things have moved on now and you can get what you like!

Sunshineandflipflops · 13/10/2020 16:20

I mean, I have a vagina and I wear a lot of blue but hardly any pink. Why is it ok for adults but not babies?!

keeprocking · 13/10/2020 16:22

@Ting20161987

Navy was and is the favorite colour to dress my little girl in since she was a baby. Its gorgeous .

My favourite too when my girls were small, the one colour they never wore was pink, all pink presents were stuffed into a drawer. Those saying it's 'old fashioned' it's a classic style, far preferable to the awful mini-me clothes.

HOkieCOkie · 13/10/2020 16:23

It’s lovely buy it.

BertieBotts · 13/10/2020 16:25

Just out of interest - the people saying its a horrible outfit, what sort of stuff do you dress your babies in? Just leggings / sweatshirts etc?

I do like rompers actually, but I don't really like the one in the OP - I don't like fussy collars like that and I'm not keen on the navy gingham. I also don't really have an interest in soldiers as a theme for clothing - it's not something that looks nice, like flowers/fish, it's not something children are interested in like animals/cars, it's not something I personally am interested in (I would buy Harry Potter baby clothes, DH would buy superhero baby clothes). There is nothing wrong with it, but it's not to my taste.

But generally yes my babies/toddlers are dressed in long sleeved t-shirts with a picture on, with brightly coloured and/or patterned soft jogging bottoms, with a sweatshirt or hoodie if it's colder. What's not to like? They are comfy, easy to get on, allow for movement and tend to be easy to wash. You can also find them in loads of cute designs.

Or a sleepsuit if under 3ish months or it's night time. Rompers or t-shirt/shorts in the summer but I tend to go for stuff with cleaner edges/more modern design.

I've not had a girl so I'm not sure how dresses would fit into this but would probably have some dresses in there somewhere.

Just out of curiosity, why are so many people against gendered clothing?

Because it's boring - you end up with overwhelming amounts of blue and grey for boys, and pink for girls. I like variety in colour, that makes me happy.

And, because some of us believe that the idea of things being "for girls" and "for boys" is the thin, harmless seeming end of a wedge which ends in seriously harmful gender stereotypes such as "Boys don't cry" and "Girls are no good at maths". Why support the idea that girls and boys are so different that they need totally different clothes?

midnightstar66 · 13/10/2020 16:26

*It's a traditional boy romper.

I'd buy it for my own daughter, but not for someone else.

It's chilly here today though & that's made me feel colder!!* 🤣

All of this (apart from the bit about buying it for my daughter as I don't like it at all, but she's had plenty bits from the boys section of shops)

LG101 · 13/10/2020 16:27

I think it’s for girls, it has a frilly collar so wouldn’t put a boy in it

speakout · 13/10/2020 16:27

Looks fine- not to my taste though- I wouldn't dress a boy or a girl in that outfit.

AldiAisleofCrap · 13/10/2020 16:29

It would be sold in the boy’s clothes section, I would put it on a girl if it was a gift but it wouldn’t be my first choice.

WhereYouLeftIt · 13/10/2020 16:35

@Plmoknijb123

Ahhh, I’m sending it as a gift to a warm country so was just looking for something ‘Londonish’ and fun. But friend though it was for a boy only so now I’m second guessing myself!!

I would dress a girl in it happily, and I get why you see it as 'Londonish'. I think it's cute.

It really pisses me off that so much gender baggage is attached to children's clothes nowadays. When DS was little, almost everything 'for boys' was navy or khaki, skulls, pirates, dinosaurs and football; whilst girls were pushed into pink and purple, butterfiles, rainbows, unicorns and fairies.

If anything, it seems even more rigidly stereotyped now.

There's a lot to be said for Victorians dressing all small children in dresses and long hair, regardless of sex. Or even the 1960s, where every colour seemed used for every child.

DespairingHomeowner · 13/10/2020 16:36

@Plmoknijb123

Just to clarify...my friend thinks it’s too boyish, but I think it’s unisex.

Is this friend the baby’s mum? In which case you should respect her wishes

I don’t think it’s unisex, and buying boys clothes for a little girl (vs girl or unisex) isn’t really nice to your friend

isadorapolly · 13/10/2020 16:37

It’s made for a boy but there’s nothing stopping you putting a girl in it.

FizzyGreenWater · 13/10/2020 16:43

It's basically 'Royal Family' baby boy wear.

So - twee, fussy and silly (bows and collars and ruffly) - which to us maps as 'girl' but here IT HAS SOLDIERS ON IT - therefore map as 'boy'.

Utterly silly.

You could buy it for a boy or a girl and they would look equally silly? I suppose that makes it unisex-?

LavaCake · 13/10/2020 16:55

Just out of curiosity, why are so many people against gendered clothing?

Because I think it’s weird to colour code your infants so people know what genitalia they have.

earthyfire · 13/10/2020 17:05

I like it but I probably wouldn't buy it and I wouldn't give it as a gift because I think it is one of those things you will either love or hate. I think vouchers are always a safe bet. 😂

IamEarthymama · 13/10/2020 17:09

My son was dressed in rompers like these in 1980. My friends mother had been buyer for the baby department in a Liverpool store for many years.

I had all her baby clothes and then passed them back.
They were not fashionable but I absolutely loved them with the hand knitted cardigans my mother sent to us.
He was like a baby in an Ahlberg book and I adored it!

AIBU to buy this romper for a baby girl?

stayathomer · 13/10/2020 17:11

It's gorgeous for either a boy or girl (only issue I can see would be the weather to wear it in!!)

Angelina82 · 13/10/2020 17:11

If you like ugly clothes buy it. 🤷🏻‍♀️