To wonder why its become ok to be so overtly cruel and unprofessional to overweight patients, and why do we (overweight patients) tolerate it?

[PasstheBucket89]

Its something ive experienced first hand, i know others have experienced over and over again, i used to work in a community role dealing often with alchoholics and ex drug users and other forms of 'bodily abuse' and they didnt recieve the same level of contempt either. from us or higher up medical staff.

Im currently expecting, due to a raised BMI i took the glucose test, i don't mind i understand why (to test for GD) ive never ever had it in past pregnancies and dont have it this time. I don't mind taking growth scans as i do understand why, the baby is actually small, likely due to my hypermesis.

Well, ive had many microaggressions that i braved out but this was totally over the line. At the growth scan i was asked why my Glucose test wasn't on the system, i said id definitely been but not sure why, i wasn't angry just assumed a system error., but i was concerned that i could have a bad result and not know. She seemed annoyed (midwife A), Midwife B appeared who actually did my test and had written it down and seemed miffed. She said must have been a system error and she launched the notepad on the desk and said "i dont know how but its normal" gesturing at me and left. Im ashamed to say i said nothing, my face i think said it all, i quickly got up and left, i was also angry at midwife A for not saying anything, that could be U. Ive made a formal complaint, but truth is I imagine there will be little said and buisness as usual. when i go back im likely to see her again. , but i wonder why on earth its got this bad and what should i say if it arises again??.

Its a sad state of affairs how disrespectful its all become.

It isn't far shaming for a doctor to point out a patient needs to lose weight. What is wrong though are the following:

• When doctors use weight as an excuse to avoid running essential tests (this has happened to me and others I know of)

• When doctors see every symptom as being fat related, however improbable (e.g. Headaches, sore throat etc)

• doctors dismissing chronic invisible illnesses as always fat related (yes happened to me and I had ME/CFS and a movement disorder)

• Doctors getting upset if fat patient pushes for more tests and investigations and telling them they just need to lose weight (happened to me and others)

-NH S GPs pushing slimming world and weight watchers in spite of diagnosis by a private mental health psychiatrist through a n eating disorder charity of binge eating disorder, compulsive eating etc Just because original diagnosis won't be in NHS notes, just accept that if a patient tells you they have this diagnosis, they aren't lying....BED and other eating issues are highly stigmatized still, it is so hard for a patient to tell you they have this issue. (Happened to me)

-GPs when deciding whether to refer obese eating disorder sufferer to mental health team for assessment saying "patient isn't making herself sick after eating" but ignoring them when they mention laxative abuse after eating (happened to me)

• Doctors dismissing weight gain as side effect of medication

Each time I have had to have extra specialist appts with midwives and obstetricians just for being fat and each time I have got to the appt and they said why have you been sent to see me and I have said because I am fat and they were like "er, is that all, what a waste of my time and yours".

But they send you as it's procedure, if staff involved in seeing women as a result of that procedure aren't aware of what it is, then that seems like there's issues there within the wider hospital team. Do you really think midwives sit there rubbing their hands with glee and wondering what extra inconvenience they can thrust upon women due to their weight? If you do, you might want to consider why you feel that way.

-oh and the assumption that we are lazy and that mobility issues, depression etc are laziness because we fat

Sadly I’m not shocked at the stupid comment she made to you - looking back on my own experiences there has been an almost systemic change in the way I’m treated since putting on weight, and it’s as damaging to us as any other form of bigotry

The lazy one pisses me off. I walk on average 400km a month.

Oh, I see! Well then YANBU that is absolutely atrocious.

-oh and the assumption that we are lazy and that mobility issues, depression etc are laziness because we fat

I don’t agree with HCPs labelling anyone as lazy. Low motivation is a better term and is often a symptom of depression. But being overweight tends to decrease motivation for exercise so I can see why they make the connection and encourage slimming groups, seeing a dietician, exercise etc.

As for mobility and joint issues, excess weight usually makes them a LOT worse. A myriad of other conditions are also worsened (and in some cases caused) by obesity. So I think HCPs have a duty of care to tell patients when their weight is making their symptoms worse. Likewise they will inform underweight patients of the health risks and conditions associated with a low BMI.

Some psychiatric meds do cause weight gain, especially certain anti-psychotics. But many patients take these and manage their weight through diet and exercise, so obesity from meds is not inevitable.

Aw no, that’s not on at all! I would have been very upset.
I’m a large lady, but have always been deemed healthy ‘despite’ my weight.
I have however suffered a similar situation. I have PCOS and don’t have much in the way of a regular cycle and was told at 16, I would never have children.
Without giving too much away, I had visited the doctor, in a bit of a panic, as I had taken several pregnancy tests, with varying results. As I hadn’t had a period in 6 months, I was seriously in need of help. I was treated brashly at my appointment, was booked in for a blood test to confirm pregnancy and basically shrugged off. When I asked if she (the doc) could perform a physical exam (given the timescale I was looking at) to see if she could feel my uterus above my pelvic bone (I thought I could), she replied that she could try, but there wasn’t really any point since I was too overweight for that. I was completely shattered.
She did perform a very quick abdominal exam, but shrugged and said she couldn’t be sure.....I was 21 weeks at that point.

So sorry you went through this @PasstheBucket89. I think sadly it's one of the last acceptable forms of prejudice. I had a friend who met a midwife for the first visit and the first thing out of her mouth was "how did someone as big as you get pregnant?" followed by "it's obvious you needed IVF, the Dr who did it should be stuck off for allowing a morbidly obese woman to endanger the life of a baby by getting pregnant". She complained and was told the practice simply wants to raise awareness about the benefits of healthy eating. Ya right!

It does need to be stopped and leaves people afraid of accessing needed health care. Best practice now is to see it through the lens of a chronic health condition, with support, and that many people who are over weight actually are healthy. BMI is not a complete health indicator.