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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be angry my husband booked my flu shot?

399 replies

Bankingswitch · 30/09/2020 17:01

Been at my desk since 7am. I go to the toilet for 10 minutes this afternoon to find Dh has booked my flu shot for a time I didn't want 

Phone rang, he picked up and it was surgery on behalf of NHS to book this year's flu shot for me.

He had the choice of 2 appointments 9am and 10.30am. He picked the second one. I always make medical appointments for first thing if I have a choice - he knows this!

If there was no choice in appointment I could accept that but there was!

Also annoyed because I am a high-risk patient (hence the flu shot) and now another 20 people will have been through the room I have to use before I even get there!!

He says it will be fine. He's so laidback all the time. He thought we could go for a walk afterwards if we went later... I am more interested in not catching COVID right now.

I am happy to hide out from COVID and flu but don't like having to go into situations like this.

Am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Italiangreyhound · 30/09/2020 20:21

It seems loads of people did not read your opening post where you DH answered your call on your behalf!

I'm glad you are feeling reassured.

Hopefully all will be well. Thanks

DianaT1969 · 30/09/2020 20:23

In the great scheme of things...
You'll be wearing a mask. Everyone before you will have been wearing a mask. Nobody stays in there for long. Everyone before you will be high risk and likely to have been shielding/keeping their bubble small and following the rules.
I do hope you have apologised to your husband. The world is crazy enough without a man being berated for accepting an appointment on your behalf.

Original poster
Bankingswitch · 30/09/2020 20:24

@Italiangreyhound

It seems loads of people did not read your opening post where you DH answered your call on your behalf!

I'm glad you are feeling reassured.

Hopefully all will be well. Thanks

Thank you - Feeling much better Smile
OP posts:
Original poster
Bankingswitch · 30/09/2020 20:26

@DianaT1969

In the great scheme of things... You'll be wearing a mask. Everyone before you will have been wearing a mask. Nobody stays in there for long. Everyone before you will be high risk and likely to have been shielding/keeping their bubble small and following the rules. I do hope you have apologised to your husband. The world is crazy enough without a man being berated for accepting an appointment on your behalf.
Thank you for your common sense reply - I know you're right and I have apologised now Smile
OP posts:
Original poster
Bankingswitch · 30/09/2020 20:27

@diddl

I can't help thinking that this comes under the "aw bless a man did something" category.

I'd expect my husband to get off his arse & ask me if I was literally in the next room.

That's the effort/consideration I would afford him & I expect the same back.

If that makes me high maintenance/demanding then so be it!

He spends half his life in the loo - I go in for 5 mins and this happens Grin
OP posts:
Melroses · 30/09/2020 20:39

What's wrong with him - can't he talk to you if you are in the loo?

Original poster
Bankingswitch · 30/09/2020 20:41

@Melroses

What's wrong with him - can't he talk to you if you are in the loo?
I think he thought he was being polite not to interrupt me.
OP posts:
nocoolnamesleft · 30/09/2020 20:41

You've managed to get a slot for a flu jab! Fantastic!

Original poster
Bankingswitch · 30/09/2020 20:45

@nocoolnamesleft

You've managed to get a slot for a flu jab! Fantastic!
I know! I didn't realise how difficult it is for others. I do feel rotten now. Genuinely had no idea! I thought everyone who needed one would get it.
OP posts:
tulippa · 30/09/2020 20:46

You need a flu jab. You are getting one. The end. Confused

Original poster
Bankingswitch · 30/09/2020 20:47

@tulippa

You need a flu jab. You are getting one. The end. Confused
This is how I want my mind to be instead of the pinball machine I have in my head.

I am hoping to achieve this with CBT over the internet.

OP posts:
Therarestone · 30/09/2020 21:25

Drama

Original poster
Bankingswitch · 30/09/2020 21:33

@Therarestone

Drama
I suppose it is dramatic but then that's healthy anxiety for you (or rather for me!)
OP posts:
Original poster
Bankingswitch · 30/09/2020 21:35

HEALTH anxiety not healthy FFS - if I were healthy none of this would have happened Grin

OP posts:
Italiangreyhound · 30/09/2020 21:37

Bankingswitch it's OK to have health anxiety, you don't owe anyone an apology for it.

Thanks

I had anxiety and had CBT for it, it really helped. You really don't owe anyone an apology for your fears and concerns but I am glad some people's thoughtful posts are putting your mind at rest.

2Zebras · 30/09/2020 21:46

At my surgery the vulnerable patients are being told to stay in their car; the nurse comes to them. They should do this for any vulnerable patients and those who don't have a car are being seen at home by the nurse.

Original poster
Bankingswitch · 30/09/2020 21:48

@Italiangreyhound

Bankingswitch it's OK to have health anxiety, you don't owe anyone an apology for it. Thanks

I had anxiety and had CBT for it, it really helped. You really don't owe anyone an apology for your fears and concerns but I am glad some people's thoughtful posts are putting your mind at rest.

Thank you that was a very kind post!

yes it isn't nice to have health anxiety I used to be so carefree I hardly recognise myself these days!

CBT definitely sounds the way to go and I'm glad you have had success with it.

OP posts:
hesaidshesaidwhat · 30/09/2020 21:51

I really don't understand the answers on this thread. I thought that surgeries were not allowed to speak to anyone other than the patient. A couple of years ago my DH tried to make an appointment for a vaccination for our DD, they wouldn't let him unless she had given her consent. I guess OP that you have given your GP surgery your consent for your DH to be a contact otherwise, sorry, but what he and they did is wrong!

mrsbyers · 30/09/2020 21:59

I had mine on Monday , waited in a gazebo outside and the jab was administered in the entrance lobby of docs surgery - sanitised twice and over in seconds , no huge risk at all as I didn’t touch any surfaces and wore mask

mxjones · 01/10/2020 01:40

My dc had theirs the other day, anti bac and temp in gazebo outside, then in foyer and anti bac again, into waiting room and had to stand on a spot with no others in the room, then into room and stood on a spot, vaccine given and out the back door without having seen any other patients or touching any part of the building. Very slick and efficient,

cbt944 · 01/10/2020 02:14

I think anyone the least bit predisposed to anxiety is going to have it ramped up in this difficult time. I thought I was going to leave my body, sitting outside in my car, prior to my flu shot. Went in when summoned, masked up, and full of trepidation - they were so nice and friendly and well-organised, and ran the thing like a military operation. It was so reassuring, and it felt wonderful once it was done.

WhatDoIDooDIoDtahW · 01/10/2020 02:20

Maybe you should leave him.

Leave him to find a woman who will appreciate that he at least tried to do something for you Blush

But no on a serious note, ring to re-arrange. I wouldn’t be annoyed he’s not a mind-reader and as much as you say “he knows I like early appointments” 10:30 is still early he probably considered the fact you might want to wake up, have breakfast (important for sugar levels before a vaccine if you’re a nervous person) and travel time to the surgery.

SD1978 · 01/10/2020 02:32

He probably reckoned you could have a bit of a sleep in, then head down, get the immunisation, and a spot of brunch afterwards. I probably would have booked the later appointment time too for that reason.

Angelina82 · 01/10/2020 03:01

LTB.

OneKeyAtATime · 01/10/2020 03:09

Did you actually post about this?!