To let 3 year old play downstairs for an hour or so at the weekend?

[GoldBar]

Would you let your three year old play downstairs for an hour or so at the weekend while you read upstairs in bed? With the video monitor on to keep an eye and some cereal and milk?

I didn't do this with my older. Probably started this year when older was 7 and younger 4, so they go down and watch tele while we stay in bed. Doors open, so they call if they need to (multiple times!!)
My eldest when 3 year old would never have gone on her own even if I felt it was ok lol. She was a cling

Leaving a baby alone because you can't be arsed to get out of bed sounds awfully selfish and doesn't give a nice message.

Only if you choose to frame it that way.

No, it’s lazy parenting. I’d get my arse up.

No.
My DS would of destroyed the living room at 3.
There is not a chance in hell my DD would of let me at 3.
I'm before my DS & DD now and love having a coffee in peace.

@SantaClaritaDiet sorry you are right, I worded that badly. I meant that there are things that a 6 year old should be able to already do independently, not that I expect 6 year olds to be completely independent. It’s a bit late to be starting the process of teaching them to start doing things independently.

Yes! My 3 year old regularly takes herself off and gets absorbed into whatever game she plays, I trust her. I think it comes down to knowing your child and nobody knows your child better than you!

Noidontwatchloveisland
I would have thought the same had I not had a child like that. She was my PFB and I enjoyed playing with her. However, she loved plenty of solitary play. She was an extremely relaxed toddler, who only had two tantrums ever, which lasted minutes.

My son has only recently started enjoying by playing alone sometimes, at age 3.

Exactly....getting up early is part and parcel of having children, just get up.

I do. Mine's three. She's allowed downstairs or upstairs on her own. We don't put the monitor on (we don't have one any more; she's three?), but I'd go up if I were worried.

A three year old really isn't a baby, and it's good for them to be allowed some independence.

I should add that if I left my daughter eating something it would one of those Ella's Kitchen fruit pouches, not proper food! And we were in a flat, so she was in the next room. A house I would feel weird about, as I wouldn't have been able to hear them.

I’m somewhere in the middle. I wouldn’t leave by 18m old for an hour while upstairs but my eldest was wanting to be independent from being tiny. She is 4 and likes making her own breakfast etc. I’m quite shocked at the amount of people saying they wouldn’t leave their 4/5 year olds unsupervised. I think that is as extreme as the 18m old example the other way.

I can’t believe all these people saying no? Mine gets up, helps himself to a glass of milk from the fridge, helps himself to fruit and cereal bars and puts bing on the telly 😳

Lol I love this, I wouldn't worry. Chances are you'll have a well rounded, capable, independent kid by the sound of it!

Not at 3 no.

DD regularly plays downstairs on her own when I have a shower, getting ready in the morning etc but she's 4 1/2

I'd set him up to play in his room instead

I have a 3 yo and he wouldn't let me. Nor would I want to

I think at 3yrs it’s hugely dependent on the child and the layout/child proofing of the house. Some of the comments are way OTT though- do people seriously keep their child by themselves at all times?? Mine is very independent and will come and get a snack whilst I’m cooking, pop to the loo, change the channel on the (child locked) TV, do some colouring. I’m not controlling their every move. There is a happy balance to be had.

@Scweltish

I can’t believe all these people saying no? Mine gets up, helps himself to a glass of milk from the fridge, helps himself to fruit and cereal bars and puts bing on the telly 😳

so the only thing your child can think about first thing in the morning is watching tv? I find it a bit sad frankly.

The whole debate is nonsense when you go into details frankly. Someone else will tell you that the milk is delivered at 5am and they are not comfortable with a 3 year old unlocking the front door to grab the milk... whilst others have the dogs in the kitchen and so one and so forth.

I personally struggle with the idea of staying in bed whilst pre-school children are told to get on with it and not disturb you. It's a bit extreme and really doesn't give a nice message. I really don't think it's the same to leave them be and have a shower, and do your own things.

I know some people who leave a child that age to walk the dog or go for a jog. I wouldn't be comfortable with it either - but I never thought twice about going at the bottom of the garden with laundry whilst they were inside.

Isn't this wierd. All posters saying no.

I distinctly remember both ds's playing happily on their own at that age. They'd be downstairs in the lounge, playing with fireman Sam, or watching tv. I'd be in the kitchen cooking spaghetti and meatballs, I'd walk into the lounge pick up some ironing and go and put in away upstairs in the bedrooms. They wouldn't take a blind bit of notice of me.

But all posters saying, no I never left my dc unattended till aged 5? Clearly a different world I parented in!

@Ratatcat

I’m somewhere in the middle. I wouldn’t leave by 18m old for an hour while upstairs but my eldest was wanting to be independent from being tiny. She is 4 and likes making her own breakfast etc. I’m quite shocked at the amount of people saying they wouldn’t leave their 4/5 year olds unsupervised. I think that is as extreme as the 18m old example the other way.

Totally agree.

...yes? I've done it with all of mine. If they woke up early they might play in their room or go downstairs and play on their own. 3 of mine are summer born- at 3 they wouldn't have been far off going to school.

Yes I would /did - they're still alive.

You can hear them, have a video monitor and live in a small house. I don't see the problem.
Mumsnet seems to attract many parents who think only their way is correct and if you let your child take any risks you're neglectful, it's nonsense. You know your own child and their abilities and if they are happy.
At 3 mine would all have the ability to go down and get a cereal bar and a drink and entertain themselves for a while.

3? Absolutely not! I'm surprised someone would even ask this to be honest.

Well we always encouraged ours to watch tv first thing as it gave one of us an hour to come round on the sofa and drink coffee before starting the day. There is nothing much I ever wanted to be doing at 6am, let alone wholesome activities with children.

That said, I wouldnt leave them alone downstairs at that age. It works really well until the day they decide to get dressed, open the front door (which you didnt know they could do) and take themselves to preschool (not one of mine but happened to a neighbour).

Oblomov20
I genuinely think it's the mindset behind. It really is not the same to leave your children play independently somewhere in the house and staying in bed until you feel like getting up. One sounds like a normal household, the other somewhere where children are an inconvenience.

No. You would be amazed how quickly (and how seriously) a small child can manage to get themselves hurt in an apparently safe environment.

"carry on neglecting them I guess."

FFS

Neglect?

BadBanana reckons that kids choke on grapes, book cases fall over crushing dc to death, and they go and turn the hob on and die of burns.

Strangely enough none of those things have ever happened to anyone I know.