To let 3 year old play downstairs for an hour or so at the weekend?

[GoldBar]

Would you let your three year old play downstairs for an hour or so at the weekend while you read upstairs in bed? With the video monitor on to keep an eye and some cereal and milk?

Not intending to drip-feed, but we don't really do toys in the bedroom here. Not because we're against it, but DC has a tiny box-room which only really fits the bed and not much else. So we've sort of evolved that downstairs is for playing, upstairs for sleeping. We have books upstairs and some jigsaws and puzzles in a box in our bedroom, but all the good stuff (from DC's perspective) is downstairs.

ntil the day they decide to get dressed, open the front door (which you didnt know they could do) and take themselves to preschool (not one of mine but happened to a neighbour).

I very strongly recommend a lock at the very top of the door to avoid exactly that! I have heard of various similar versions happening to people I knew.
A friend of mine had the opposite: found a complete stranger who was shown around the house by her child who had somehow managed to open the door and let them in!

I wouldn't. They could get into all sorts of mischief. They aren't 3 forever, just get up and chill on the sofa.

No , I wouldn't. My nearly three year old is quite sensible but I still wouldn't take a risk. Toddlers are capable of anything at anytime. Can't trust them lot.

@SantaClaritaDiet yes, the only thing my child is capable of thinking of is tv poor neglected soul that he is 😂

I love how everyone is implying that is is lazy parenting to leave the child. Let's say OP is doing something else in another room - the risk doesn't change. Would people still see a problem?

Nooo. We live in a flat so only one storey.

DD (almost 4) sometimes gets up before us, and we hear her padding around, playing in her room (we hear her on the monitor) drawing in the living room, but it's for 20mins max. I wouldn't want her to be up and around without us for an hour, in case it's the hour she decides to scale a bookshelf or turn on the hob.

reckons that kids choke on grapes, book cases fall over crushing dc to death, and they go and turn the hob on and die of burns

Grapes: www.google.com/amp/s/www.huffingtonpost.ca/amp/2018/09/07/grapes-choking-hazard_a_23520108/

Falling furniture: www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/amp/world-us-canada-51017438

Burns and also tipping furniture, stairs and a couple of others:
www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/apr/24/children-accidental-injuries-coronavirus-lockdown

Scweltish
In a world of parents smug about putting tv in children's bedroom from their 1st birthday, I don't think neglected is the right word.
Still sad.

• I never quite understand the children who from a very young age will just play alone with zero adult interaction for 30/40 mins plus.

It always sort of makes me feel they have just been ignored a lot or not often played with actively*

Personally I never understand the children who from a very young age need constant interaction and direction from parents in order to play.

It always sort of makes me feel they have just been stifled or are lacking in imagination.

@SantaClaritaDiet

Scweltish In a world of parents smug about putting tv in children's bedroom from their 1st birthday, I don't think neglected is the right word. Still sad.

Oh stop being dramatic 😂😂 ‘My 3 year old gets up, gets himself a drink and breakfast and put a bit of bing on the telly’. OMG ITS SO SAD THAT ALL YOUR 3 YEAR OLD CAN THINK ABOUT IN THE MORNING IS TV 😂😂

@SchadenfreudePersonified

No. You would be amazed how quickly (and how seriously) a small child can manage to get themselves hurt in an apparently safe environment.

Like in their bedrooms? You have to sleep at some point.

@boomboomg

I love how everyone is implying that is is lazy parenting to leave the child. Let's say OP is doing something else in another room - the risk doesn't change. Would people still see a problem?

Not the same at all.

No.

No I have a 3 year old boy and I wouldn’t let him. I didn’t with my daughter and only now I’m more comfortable and she is 7 and I know she wouldn’t touch anything and only play

In the place we were living in when ds was 3 yes we may have done.

Not on MN but I did joke we let our toddler do the peddles on our car so we could get home from the pub, I was believed, i wonder if i should have mentioned 'our 3 year old cooks us breakfast in bed then recites Betjeman while spinning plates and similatenously writes our selection criteria for our job applications' or too much?

My 3yo is playing happily upstairs somewhere while I’m downstairs drinking a coffee THE POOR NEGLECTED CHILD

I wouldn’t be happy if she was downstairs alone while I was asleep but surely no one supervises their 3yo constantly

No, it's too young.

No way.op what are you thinking?😁

@Oblomov20

"carry on neglecting them I guess."

FFS

Neglect?

BadBanana reckons that kids choke on grapes, book cases fall over crushing dc to death, and they go and turn the hob on and die of burns.

Strangely enough none of those things have ever happened to anyone I know.

Are you genuinely that hard of thinking?

You reckon this is a very rare occurrence do you? Children choking? Children burning themselves? Furniture crushing children?

Do yourself a favour and use google if you have the stomach for it.

Idiot.

Re: mental health, some of the most messed up teenagers I know come from council estates (same as the one I grew up in) with the sort of parents that kicked them out in the morning and told them to fuck off until bedtime.

They had plenty of ‘independence’, funnily enough its didn’t seem to do them much good.

Wow. My 3 year old and 8 year old could easily play by themselves for an hour. But not the 3 year old downstairs. But in his room (which is v safe), yes. And during the pandemic with both DH and I working with shelter in place policies, he’s had to play in his room for a bit.
A 20 month old, no matter how safe should not be climbing stairs on their own.
They do not have the impulse control to be left on their own.
And they are not verbal enough to explain what might have gone wrong.
Even by my lax standards that is a bit much

Your op and subsequent posts give two different messages,the initial one implies you are going back to sleep,the others imply you are wide awake,drinking coffee and never taking your eyes off the monitor.which is the real truth here ?

Wow! I’m a bit surprised at the comments here. I have left my three year old playing alone in the living room while attending to the baby. There’s a stairgate across the doorway so he can’t get out, but can obviously call to us and the room is well childproofed with nothing around that could
be a danger. Now I feel like maybe I shouldn’t be doing this?

@KarmaStar

Your op and subsequent posts give two different messages,the initial one implies you are going back to sleep,the others imply you are wide awake,drinking coffee and never taking your eyes off the monitor.which is the real truth here ?

Given the amount of YABUs before the story changed I think we know.

@KarmaStar. I thought all my posts made it clear that I would be awake, reading in bed. I just like to drink my coffee and read in peace for a bit before getting up at the weekend and playing dollies.