Newborn mask wearing

[firstpregnancy1]

I'm currently pregnant and due next week with my first baby!

I have quite a big family who live in various places in the Uk, mostly the south, none in the stricter lockdown areas.

I've been umming and ahhing for a long while about how it's going to look after baby is born and how /when/logistics of family visiting and I've very much been 'let's wait and see'. But that time is ever approaching!

My query isn't whether or not to let family meet the newborn, but rather should I request people wear masks when they're holding him/close by? All of my family and friends who visit are mask wearers in shops etc so no one with any medical exemptions or any other exemptions and I'm sure all would oblige. (Some may oblige whilst I raising their eyebrows or jokily call me precious but would oblige nonetheless as they would respect our choices).

In terms of risk, my partner works in central London and will only be having 2 weeks off work paternity leave before going back to the daily grind of commuting on the train and the tube and then working in a role which is mostly office based but regularly coming into close contact with members of the public in situations which don't allow for social distancing/mask wearing, depending on the circumstances.

So the liklihood is that he will be coming and going from work, in central London, and he won't be wearing a mask around the baby so does that make us a bit hypocritical to then ask others to, as chances are he will be back at work before a lot of our family will have had chance to visit.

For clarity, we wouldn't be breaking the rule of 6, people would be visiting either on their own or with their partner, and nor would it be different visitors every day of the week, were probably talking both sets of grandparents and both sides sibling within the first few weeks and then wider family in dribs and drabs in the following few weeks.

If you're personally choosing not to have visitors for your newborns at all, that's your choice but please dont hound me for our decisions to allow visitors, the query here is about asking relatives to wear masks or not.

Thanks

Anyone who had to deal with a newborn or near newborn with a simple cold, especially your first baby, will know how hard it is.

It's bonkers to break current social distancing rules, but at the very least visitors shouldn't even need to be asked to wear masks.

That ridiculous MN need and right to have a "cuddle" with a newborn that is not yours is so entitled and embarrassing. Babies need their parents, they don't need to be treated like a soft toy and go from arm to arm with extended family. It seems especially bad from MIL for some reasons, but no one in their right mind will even blink about wearing a mask!

Strict hand washing , wear a mask and no kissing the baby. I would personally keep everyone away for a few weeks anyway.

Their babies need to be held and cuddled by the other people who love them. They need to feel them and smell them. The mothers need to know, viscerally, that they are part of something bigger than their own four walls. Anything else is completely shit.

WTF. In the middle of a pandemic?

No, it's not at all unreasonable. No mask - no visit to see your baby.

Their babies need to be held and cuddled by the other people who love them. They need to feel them and smell them. The mothers need to know, viscerally, that they are part of something bigger than their own four walls.

you must have a pretty shit family if you don't feel part of it without them squeezing and smelling the baby.

'it would be a shame to spoil it for your baby and not let him see all the smiling faces that are holding him. Seeing faces is important for babies, and I think if mine were still tiny I’d prefer them to have that normality.'

Like the baby's going to know or care! Or do you think it will hold it against you in years to come?

@3WildOnes

Under 5s are twice as likely to die from Flu than Covid, so I would think you were very precious and a bit bonkers privately. I would wear a mask though.

Now, as it's proving very difficult for people under 65 to actually get a flu vaccination at present (Boots have run out, for example, the supply is being restricted to pharmacies until 'mid October' and unless somebody is in a particularly vulnerable group, the age 50-65s that are supposed to be vaccinated this year aren't able to access it until the vulnerable groups have had theirs), I'd actually say that it would be wise to wear a mask just because of the risk of influenza and other seasonal viruses (vomiting, sore throat/tonsillitis, colds) right now and never mind Covid

I've got a 6 month old and make all visitors wear a mask. I don't think it's hypocritical as you can't expect your partner to wear one 24/7 and less exposure the baby has the better so just because your partner isn't wearing one doesn't mean no one should, do what's best for you and your baby, they should understand

I wouldn’t let them visit.

They’ve got to be 2 metres away anyway? Or a metre with a mask. You’re not allowed to touch. If you want them to wear masks as well fair enough

I'd wear a mask if asked. My baby is older and haven't asked grandparents or aunts/uncles to wear a mask. Our area has had 2 Covid deaths since March so I guess that helped form our decision. Obviously wouldn't let anyone with symptoms of any illness near a newborn.

I’d not be letting anyone with 2m of a newborn. SD is there for a reason.

I had my baby in June OP but didn't ask anyone to wear a face mask but I wouldn't care if someone else asked me to wear one for their baby so it's completely your choice.
He's my third baby and although careful, lots of hand washing, hand gels, no touching or kissing baby's face (which is my norm anyway with a newborn) I do weigh it up with the importance of babies getting some exposure to other people and the germs they would normally pick up.
I did wait though until he was 4 weeks and slightly more robust before anyone met him in the flesh.

Thanks everybody but can we please try not to derail the thread. I did say that this was about requesting mask wearing rather than whether or not to allow visitors /anyone to hold baby at all.

If you have chosen not to allow any holding/visitors I totally respect that and it's entirely fair enough. Likewise if you are of the opinion that you wouldn't be allowing any visitors / holding / only outside through a window.

That isn't our decision and our decision is to allow some close family and friends to visit and hold the baby. (Also fully aware I could change my mind once baby has arrived but that's also fine)

But that's not what the aim of the thread discussion was - the thread topic is about requesting visitors to wear masks or not. If you would like to discuss whether or not to allow visits/cuddles then please kindly start another thread.

In non-lockdown areas of England the rule of six does not specify that those six people must be from no more than two household, they can be from multiple households. This applies both indoors and outdoors.

My great niece didnt let anyone hold her newborn when she was born in July and we supported her choice. I may of gone the same route in your or her position to be honest.

Sorry @Lockdownseperation I did realise you agreed! I was agreeing more! 😂

Totally your call, I don't believe babies are at risk, no myself so personally I wouldn't ask but of course better safe than sorry

@firstpregnancy1

I think people were pointing out social distancing / no one should be holding the baby because the mask point is rather irrelevant if you stay 2m away/ don’t hold the baby as people shouldn’t be. Of course it’s your choice, but it’s entirely clear why people have commented on it.

YANBU

Touching or holding the baby by visitors can’t happen, though. It’s not your choice to make. You have to socially distance. That’s why people are commenting.

I hate masks but would definitely wear one to meet a newborn.

@Lockdownseperation that is not quite correct. In England the 6 people rule applies to up to 6 households, not 2 (stupidly!)

I don't really see the point in wearing a mask if you're going to let them cuddle the baby anyway.

If someone is positive for vivid, the virus will be all over them, including the clothes they are wearing. So while a visitor can wear a mask and wash their hands, it wouldn't necessarily stop the virus transferring to your baby. So it would reduce the risk of course, but social distancing is to be maintained been with masks for a reason

For what it's worth, if I was meeting a newborn and I was asked to wear a mask, I would happily do so.

Pre Covid I could not abide why visitors to my new borns felt the need to get right up in their faces. We all need personal space and we would do this to older children so why defenceless ones with who cannot move away and with new immune systems.
I would consider it sensible and safe to expect all visitors to wear a mask and sanitise before seeing the newborn in the current climate.