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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell all the black mumsnetters we now have our own forum

999 replies

Marg33t · 16/09/2020 13:40

Thanks to the fab PatricksRum for fighting against racism we've got our own board here

Look for black mumsnetters 👍🏿

OP posts:
SionnachRua · 16/09/2020 17:53

@OnceUponAThimble

I suppose the difference for Craicnet or Scotsnet is the difference in law/politics/schooling etc. within Ireland and the UK. I think I noticed an Aussie chat thread recently for our Aussie friends. It wasn't a sub-forum, just a chat thread. NI doesn't have a subforum. Discussing the school holidays on MN when you're Scottish would be pointless as they're totally different. I don't mind differentiating based on jurisdiction, but colour is a step too far for me. It's likely a new black poster may think that he/she can only post on the black forum.
If that black person was only interested in black issues then you might have a point. However black people are actually people with thoughts, dislikes and feelings too.

No doubt many black people out there would get value out of Yoga, The Tack Room, Gardening, Baby Names, Chat, Creative Writing...to name but a few. We don't need to infantilise black people by assuming they won't venture out of their bubble. After all, the Irish wander out of Craicnet just fine.

If NI (or Wales? Do they have a sub forum?) want a sub forum then more power to them. All it takes is people to agitate for it and a willingness to listen from MN.

GoGadgetGo · 16/09/2020 17:54

So there should be one for asian mumsnetters now, surely?

I don't understand why there is a separate forum for black mumsnetters. Are their needs any different to lthe others'

I can understand things around 'black peoples hair' etc. This though seems wrong to me. Going back in time. It's separation. Amd nothing like the mojos which I get.
This seems like one person wanted and ppl jumped on it to be PC. This site is called mumsnet surely for all mums (ands dads if they like) to share experiences. Why the need for the colour divide?

The world's gone nuts!

Quaagars · 16/09/2020 17:54

After all, the Irish wander out of Craicnet just fine

Shock

Who let the Irish out?! Don't they know they're only supposed to post on Craicnet?! Grin

cologne4711 · 16/09/2020 17:54

My pointless opinions wouldn’t be welcome, why would they be

Well yours might be, and I am white so I wouldn't involve myself either, but I was surprised to read on the first page of this thread that you should be excluded as a white parent of a black child. Presumably you still have to have The Talk and all of that so you have many of the same concerns.

However, I took a peek and saw that someone who was mixed race had posted about her own mixed race child and received a kind reply, so mixed race women are not excluded.

SionnachRua · 16/09/2020 17:56

@Quaagars

After all, the Irish wander out of Craicnet just fine Shock

Who let the Irish out?! Don't they know they're only supposed to post on Craicnet?! Grin

Yes ma'am, sorry ma'am. Just give me my daily potato ration and I'll be back to Craicnet for more dancing at the crossroads and praying the rosary Grin
Quaagars · 16/09/2020 17:56

So there should be one for asian mumsnetters now, surely?
So campaign for one then?

I don't understand why there is a separate forum for black mumsnetters
Because @patricksrum campaigned for one , there was interest in one from quite a few posters, and managed to be successful (well done) - if you ask, you might get a board too?

Sanitisethat · 16/09/2020 17:57

excuse me but it's clear white people aren't welcome there.

But why do you expect to be? What are you planning to contribute to threads where black people discuss their experiences of being black?

If you had conceived five children in the first month of trying every time, do you think your opinions would be welcomed on a thread about infertility? If you’re a beef farmer do you think your opinions would be welcome on a thread about becoming vegan? If you’re English do you think Scotsnet would welcome your opinions on a thread about Scottish schools?

Obviously you can still post on these threads if you want to. If it’s so important to you, go for it. But why would you expect to be welcomed when you don’t have any relevant experience and can’t relate to the subject?

And actually, you might find you are welcome if you’re being genuine and decent. I doubt you would face any opposition for starting a thread saying something like ‘can anyone recommend a good hairdresser for black hair in south Glasgow because my black friend has just moved here and is looking for a salon’. But if the thread is a discussion on how to style black hair and you leap in to say you don’t like afros, or think that braiding looks unprofessional, or that you prefer natural hair to chemically straightened hair, you can presumably see why nobody would want to hear your views...?

StormzyInaDCup · 16/09/2020 17:57

Well said @BadBanana 👍

SionnachRua · 16/09/2020 17:58

@GoGadgetGo

So there should be one for asian mumsnetters now, surely?

I don't understand why there is a separate forum for black mumsnetters. Are their needs any different to lthe others'

I can understand things around 'black peoples hair' etc. This though seems wrong to me. Going back in time. It's separation. Amd nothing like the mojos which I get.
This seems like one person wanted and ppl jumped on it to be PC. This site is called mumsnet surely for all mums (ands dads if they like) to share experiences. Why the need for the colour divide?

The world's gone nuts!

Why not have a forum for Asian MNers then, if people want it? If enough people want it I don't see why not. However afaik no one has been looking for that. Off you go and start the campaign if you feel very strongly about it.
Esspee · 16/09/2020 17:58

This is just so wrong.
Do the reverse. Would it be OK to set up a White Mumsnet group?
Hell no!
There is one race - the human race, anything else is regression.

BadBanana · 16/09/2020 17:58

I can understand things around 'black peoples hair' etc. This though seems wrong to me.

No idea, I’ve posted about my hair in the past in style and beauty and it was met with informative responses.

I didn’t bother asking the posters that answered what colour their skin was Confused

The important thing was that they clearly had experience of my hair type, either through being black, having black children or being a hairdresser.

But it seems op has won this weird new regressive section of the forum battle. With mainly support from white people judging by the responses.

Odd.

Quaagars · 16/09/2020 17:58

@SionnachRua

Grin
OnceUponAThimble · 16/09/2020 17:58

Well, believe it or not, my dc are mixed race and my DH is black (I am white) and it is because of that, that I object to this disintegration. I would not like my dc to go onto a forum to find that there's a little 'black corner' for them to post in. And I hope to fuck that they never have the misfortune of finding such a place either.

Quaagars · 16/09/2020 18:00

I don't understand why there is a separate forum for black mumsnetters. Are their needs any different to lthe others'

Maybe try reading the previous threads (and this one)?
It shows EXACTLY why sometimes you want a space to talk with others with shared experiences

Clymene · 16/09/2020 18:01

I have to say that I really didn't realise quite how deeply racist MN was until patricksrum started her campaign. It has really shocked me.

WhoAmIWhoAreYou · 16/09/2020 18:01

[quote BIWI]@WhoAmIWhoAreYou

How would a black person feel if white people had their own part of the forum?

I think you'll find that most of MN is made of white posters, therefore this already exists.

I think there is clearly a divide going on here and I don't understand why MN has allowed this to happen

Then you must be very hard of thinking.

Or racist.

Or both ... Hmm[/quote]
How is my fault the majority of MN is white.. how am I even supposed to know that? There is no indication of that is there.. not like, "Hey, I'm white" etc ...

I am not a racist thanks but I'm guesing black people can't be racists can they. Hmm

StormzyInaDCup · 16/09/2020 18:01

@Quaagars no! I use the main mn quite well. I don't see the need to divide off to be perfectly honest.

A BAME group is inclusive at least. Not a group where white parents of black children won't be welcome. Never mind other races. What a joke.

Unescorted · 16/09/2020 18:01

Awesome work @PatricksRum. I hope the racist trolls stay on the main boards and give you a quiet place to be.

I am baffled by the opposition. You aren't banned - just respectfully asked not to assume when you are reading the threads that the poster is not white and that your experience may not be valid to the situation that is being discussed.

I don't get why people feel so threatened by it that they have to be nasty. Grow up, collect an empathy card and stop being so self absorbed.

SionnachRua · 16/09/2020 18:02

Also I think something that is being ignored here is that no one HAS to post in the black mumsnetter section if they don't want to. There are plenty of topics in Chat and AIBU that could be posted in specific subforums, I have never seen them moved unless OP asks for it. This is another option - if you don't want to use it, no one is forcing you to.

Havaiana · 16/09/2020 18:03

@OnceUponAThimble

Well, believe it or not, my dc are mixed race and my DH is black (I am white) and it is because of that, that I object to this disintegration. I would not like my dc to go onto a forum to find that there's a little 'black corner' for them to post in. And I hope to fuck that they never have the misfortune of finding such a place either.
A case in point that marrying a black person doesn't automatically bestow on you understanding of black issues.

I'm BAME, there will be times when I will need a safe place to post and I'm happy BMN exists.

OnceUponAThimble · 16/09/2020 18:03

just respectfully asked not to assume when you are reading the threads that the poster is not white and that your experience may not be valid to the situation that is being discussed.

I couldn't care less what colour you are.

GoGadgetGo · 16/09/2020 18:03

@Quaagars
So there should be one for asian mumsnetters now, surely?
So campaign for one then?

No, because I'm not Asian and even if I was, I wouldn't want one.

I don't understand why there is a separate forum for black mumsnetters
Because @patricksrum campaigned for one , there was interest in one from quite a few posters, and managed to be successful (well done) - if you ask, you might get a board too?

Yes maybe I will ask for a board for 'People with common sense board' This is daft and wrong. Someone asks and get. People should say no and explain why it is not required. PC madness.

Havaiana · 16/09/2020 18:04

You aren't banned - just respectfully asked not to assume when you are reading the threads that the poster is not white and that your experience may not be valid to the situation that is being discussed.

Well said!

OnceUponAThimble · 16/09/2020 18:05

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

southeastdweller · 16/09/2020 18:05

So is this thread only for black MNers? CBA to read the whole thread but I see that the OP has barely commented on a 7 page thread.