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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that if you are high risk you should prob not be on the bus?

212 replies

malificent7 · 14/09/2020 07:13

Prepared to get lynched here but i get the bus to hospital placement every day. There is a young man on bus who normally wears a mask. Today he wasn't. He forgot.
A woman on the bus kicked off at him massively as she has cancer. Yes i do sympathise with her but if I had cancer I wouldnt be travelling by bus. Id go to chemo by taxi. The risk is just too great atm.
He should have worn a mask but she should be protecting herself. My mum died of cancer so I know how hard it us.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 14/09/2020 07:50

@malificent7

I know the taxi is expensive..But for the sake of my health then I would pay. I know I sound like an arse here but she genuinely sounded terrified...I just couldn't do it to myself ...and I am a skint student. Kids under 11 don't have to wear masks and there may be loads of them on the bus.
Well your obviously not that skint if you can’t figure why for many that won’t be an option.

Even at a relatively short trip of £10 each way to the hospital that would still be £100 a week if on daily treatment like many have.

ameliajoan · 14/09/2020 07:50

The nhs should be able to provide the transport.

Should is not the same as able to.

SqidgeBum · 14/09/2020 07:50

@malificent7 it's not the NHS's responsibility to give her transport. It's the mans responsibility to not board the bus without a mask. He just didnt bother. I am not sure why it's the woman with cancer who is the one you think should change her actions here tbh.

pastandpresent · 14/09/2020 07:51

I can see both pov, but it's tricky one. Yes, the man just forgot the mask, but maybe he should have got off the bus, or didn't get on the bus in the first place, if the bus was on the hospital route. There must be many on the bus feeling even more vulnerable than others.
And if he forgot the mask, and didn't have the time to go home and get one, he could have done many things, like use something else as alternative.

Emeraldshamrock · 14/09/2020 07:51

Masks may not be magic though if I cough while out and about Asthmatic my mask catches it, if the passenger was infected his mask would catch his cough or stop the force.

PurpleDaisies · 14/09/2020 07:51

@TheGreatWave

Trouble is too many people think a mask is a magic forcefield against infection. Had it been this time last year she would have been on a much more crowded bus with everyone coughing and sneezing everywhere.

He should have been in a mask but she can't put her faith purely down to mask wearing.

I agree with this. He could have just sat as far from her as possible and opened the window.

The bus driver probably should have refused him access to the bus because he wasn’t exempt-he forgot his mask.

LadyCatStark · 14/09/2020 07:52

But forgetting your mask shouldn’t be an excuse for not wearing one. And I say this as someone who forgets my mask allllll the time!

Original poster
malificent7 · 14/09/2020 07:52

If the nhs are providing the service ( which they were for mil) I would urge the high risk to take it...especially for chemo as your immune system is fucked.

OP posts:
Starlingbird · 14/09/2020 07:53

The vulnerable are working and have to send their children to school even though they are at huge health risk. They are not being protected.

Taxi’s not necessarily safer and expensive.

Original poster
malificent7 · 14/09/2020 07:54

I agree that the man should have worn the mask but also she should be aware that with a weakened immune system the bus is not sae even with masks.

OP posts:
iVampire · 14/09/2020 07:54

People living with cancer do more than go to medical appointments - our reasons for being on the bus are just the same as everyone else’s - work, school run, shopping, appointments etc etc

Please don’t assume that we’re ‘other’

Original poster
malificent7 · 14/09/2020 07:54

Safe

OP posts:
icecreamconie · 14/09/2020 07:54

@malificent7

If the nhs are providing the service ( which they were for mil) I would urge the high risk to take it...especially for chemo as your immune system is fucked.

You do not have a clue. Not a single fucking clue. Stop judging people. How awful.

AdoptAdaptImprove · 14/09/2020 07:57

Two of the people I know who had chemotherapy for their cancers were working at the same time, just had time off for their appointments. Living with cancer means just that. Now that shielding has been paused, people in this woman’s position will be out and about like everyone else, outside of their appointments as well as going to hospital. She has every right to expect the tiny courtesy of people wearing face coverings on public transport to protect others.

I am constantly amazed at the degree of selfishness and lack of any sense of being part of a society which Covid has exposed.

FourTeaFallOut · 14/09/2020 07:57

If the nhs are providing the service ( which they were for mil) I would urge the high risk to take it...

If is the word you need to sit on for a while op and have a little think.

unimaginativeusernamehere · 14/09/2020 07:58

I know the taxi is expensive..But for the sake of my health then I would pay.

And if it was a choice between the taxi and keeping your power on or eating that week?

I'm assuming you're training to be a medical professional? You need to work on your empathy.

ShalomToYouJackie · 14/09/2020 07:58

She is probably fully aware that a bus full of people isn't safe for her. I can't believe how narrow minded you're being. You'd think somebody working in a hospital full of scared and poorly people would be a bit more understanding.

Has it occurred to you that it's very likely she can't afford to get a taxi to and from the hospital several days a week.

If you could afford to get a taxi every day 'for the sake of your health' then you're not that skint OP.

TheDuchessofMalfy · 14/09/2020 07:59

I don’t think people should be kicking off at each other. Obviously he wasn’t mask exempt as he wears it other days but others might be.

However she’s got every right to ride the bus, and I agree taxis are expensive. He shouldn’t really have got on the bus without the mask and ought to have walked or gone back for it / bought one on the way if available.

Starlingbird · 14/09/2020 07:59

I’m sure she is aware with a weakened immune system it’s not safe. Hence sounding terrified.

ineedaholidaynow · 14/09/2020 08:00

Can you imagine how teachers and pupils with cancer are currently feeling being made to go to schools with very little protection against COVID?

icecreamconie · 14/09/2020 08:01

@malificent7

I just felt very uncomfortable with the whole situation and gave the man a mask...i will always carry a spare stash now just in case. The nhs should be able to provide the transport. Mil just died of lung cancer and at the start of the pandemic she was getting transport courtesy of NHS hospital.

The NHS cannot provide transport for every single cancer patient. Catch a grip of yourself OP.

Soubriquet · 14/09/2020 08:02

But for the sake if my health I would pay

Ah I see. She should have gone to the magic money tree in the garden first so she could afford the taxi

Batshitbeautycosmeticsltd · 14/09/2020 08:03

@CountessFrog

My father in law had free taxis on the NHS when he was having chemo.

I suspect it was due to the centre being 30 miles away, but it’s worth mentioning in case anyone here doesn’t know that’s available.

Worth mentioning some trusts don't offer this.
WiseUpJanetWeiss · 14/09/2020 08:04

@malificent7

I know the taxi is expensive..But for the sake of my health then I would pay. I know I sound like an arse here but she genuinely sounded terrified...I just couldn't do it to myself ...and I am a skint student. Kids under 11 don't have to wear masks and there may be loads of them on the bus.
How would you pay if you don’t have any money?

I hope you learn some empathy before you qualify.

Carycy · 14/09/2020 08:04

If it was a choice between keeping her heating on and paying for a taxi I think she would be able to claim back her transport costs.

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