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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that if you are high risk you should prob not be on the bus?

212 replies

malificent7 · 14/09/2020 07:13

Prepared to get lynched here but i get the bus to hospital placement every day. There is a young man on bus who normally wears a mask. Today he wasn't. He forgot.
A woman on the bus kicked off at him massively as she has cancer. Yes i do sympathise with her but if I had cancer I wouldnt be travelling by bus. Id go to chemo by taxi. The risk is just too great atm.
He should have worn a mask but she should be protecting herself. My mum died of cancer so I know how hard it us.

OP posts:
Plexie · 14/09/2020 07:28

Question for the OP, why didn't it occur to you that maybe the woman can't afford taxis?

ameliajoan · 14/09/2020 07:28

YABU. If that young man did not have a mask he should not have got on the bus; he should have gone and got one, not put everyone else at risk.

coffeeforone · 14/09/2020 07:29

I don't think it's unreasonable for either him to forget a mask (understandable), or for her to not be happy about that (again completely understandable), maybe she should have reminded him more politely though - which would probably be enough for him to not forget again. He could have been exempt for all she knew so I don't think it's a good idea to approach strangers in an aggressive manner.

RobinlovesCormoran · 14/09/2020 07:30

I work with people who are high-risk from various illnesses but are still working and using public transport in order to get to work. We are discouraged from using cars and taxis are too expensive, even Uber. I don't think masks make much difference but I wear one and out of respect of others who are frightened or anxious everyone else should wear one too.

coffeeforone · 14/09/2020 07:30

But of course YABU to think she shouldn't be on a bus.

Emeraldshamrock · 14/09/2020 07:32

Shameful OP. Are you a medical professional?

CountessFrog · 14/09/2020 07:34

My father in law had free taxis on the NHS when he was having chemo.

I suspect it was due to the centre being 30 miles away, but it’s worth mentioning in case anyone here doesn’t know that’s available.

Eng123 · 14/09/2020 07:34

Wow! Of course the woman is right. She is doing the best she can whilst battling cancer.
Two weeks ago I was going home from london on the train with my family (essential consular services). I and oh were wearing masks almost no one else in the carriage. One chap about half a carriage away not wearing a mask and talking loudly on a phone. Ok maybe he had his reasons - it still annoys me. But he then proceeded to sit himself behind my family- in an empty train! I gave him both barrels and he grudgingly moved a row back, and described me on the phone as "one of those". OP I spent all day yesterday driving my child to a test centre so yes the man was in the wrong, if you have forgotten your mask you don't get on the bus!

RoseAndRose · 14/09/2020 07:35

He could have been exempt for all she knew

He was on the bus often enough in a mask for that clearly not to apply.

If OP has seen him often enough to know that, so has everyone else.

People not in masks pose a risk, but that is entirely avoidable for the vast majority. Just 'forgot' really isn't adequate

Alexandernevermind · 14/09/2020 07:36

This post is a bit victim blaming.

ChesterDrawsDoesntExist · 14/09/2020 07:36

A taxi to my hospital from my house would be £60. It's been a while since I stepped foot on public transport but I assume they're still cheaper than taxis. A train then a bus cheaper still for me.
You don't know this woman's situation.

When my dad tried cancer treatment it was DAILY trips to the hospital, 5 days a week for weeks and weeks on end. In fact, what time he did have he wasted it in a car travelling to an from radiotherapy and chemo. I can't imagine if he'd needed to pay a taxi twice every day.

Eng123 · 14/09/2020 07:36

You forget your mask and it's the cancer patient that has to get off the bus?

3billboardsoutsidebarnsley · 14/09/2020 07:41

I imagine the woman would rather not be on a bus right now but doesn’t have much choice. It’s not a big thing to ask that people wear a mask in confined spaces. Like pp‘s have said taxis are really expensive and she probably can’t run to paying the fare. We need to work together on this and look out for one another wherever we can. If that means wearing a mask then everyone who is able to wear one should wear one.

Original poster
malificent7 · 14/09/2020 07:44

I know the taxi is expensive..But for the sake of my health then I would pay. I know I sound like an arse here but she genuinely sounded terrified...I just couldn't do it to myself ...and I am a skint student.
Kids under 11 don't have to wear masks and there may be loads of them on the bus.

OP posts:
allfalldown47 · 14/09/2020 07:44

Do you have any empathy op?
Let's hope your never in that poor women's shoes, imagine having to travel by bus when you're feeling vulnerable and unwell?

AverageNSad · 14/09/2020 07:46

But what if she genuinely couldn't pay? What should she do then?

amusedtodeath1 · 14/09/2020 07:46

YABVU

Emeraldshamrock · 14/09/2020 07:47

But for the sake of my health then I would pay. I know I sound like an arse here but she genuinely sounded terrified Do you Not understand some people afford to pay for the sake of their health. Are you a medical professional? I'm embarrassed for you.
I always keep a spare disposable if someone forgets maybe you should too.

Racoonworld · 14/09/2020 07:47

@malificent7

I know the taxi is expensive..But for the sake of my health then I would pay. I know I sound like an arse here but she genuinely sounded terrified...I just couldn't do it to myself ...and I am a skint student. Kids under 11 don't have to wear masks and there may be loads of them on the bus.
If you don’t have the money then you can’t pay, even for the sake of your health. How can you not understand that? Where would the money be magicked up from?
Original poster
malificent7 · 14/09/2020 07:47

I just felt very uncomfortable with the whole situation and gave the man a mask...i will always carry a spare stash now just in case.
The nhs should be able to provide the transport. Mil just died of lung cancer and at the start of the pandemic she was getting transport courtesy of NHS hospital.

OP posts:
Yeahnahmum · 14/09/2020 07:47

I agree with you op. But maybe she simply doesnt have the moneyto afford a taxi/friends to bring her.

TheGreatWave · 14/09/2020 07:48

Trouble is too many people think a mask is a magic forcefield against infection. Had it been this time last year she would have been on a much more crowded bus with everyone coughing and sneezing everywhere.

He should have been in a mask but she can't put her faith purely down to mask wearing.

FourTeaFallOut · 14/09/2020 07:48

I know the taxi is expensive..But for the sake of my health then I would pay.

Do you not think, given her terrified reaction, that money might not be a minor factor when she got on that bus instead of phoning for a taxi?

Emeraldshamrock · 14/09/2020 07:49

*Can't afford

Porcupineinwaiting · 14/09/2020 07:49

But for the sake if my health I would pay

Even if it meant you couldn't pay the rent? Or put the heating on?

I mean, I'd pay too - because I'd be in the privileged position of being able to afford it. But that's what it is - privilege - which means it's not an option for everyone.

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