Bus weirdo! Should I have moved?

[Baternburg]

Was on the bus home from town with my DS, almost 1 year. We’d gone in to buy supplies for his birthday cake. On the bus there is a space for wheelchairs/buggies so I put the buggy there as usual and sat down on the little fold down seat next to it, and started to give baby a bottle as he was getting hungry.
I get a tap on the shoulder and turn round to see a man, no mask on, smelling of booze, telling me I can’t sit there as I’m sitting too close to him. Now, there were perhaps 6 other people on the bus and it was a double decker, so plenty of space where he could have moved. I said to him ‘no, I’m feeding my baby’ and turned around back to face pram. Get another tap and turned round, said ‘can you stop touching me’ and turned back around. Man then says again I need to move, 2 metres distance etc. Again without a mask on. I say ‘I’m not moving at the moment as I’m feeding my baby’. He then attempts to fold up my chair WHILE I’m sitting on it. I said again ‘don’t touch me’ and turned away again because I could see him getting agitated and I didn’t want a scene or want things to escalate, even though I wanted to call him a miserable bastard. He then says he’s going to tell the driver, and gets up and over to the driver. Old lady across from us has a go at him as well. The driver tells me there is another seat on the other side of the buggy so I can turn the buggy around. I didn’t realise this seat was there as it’s also a fold up one and it’s kind of folded into a wheelchair pad thing so looks like it’s just part of that. So I do go and sit there l, again I’m not wanting to make a scene or stoop to the weirdo’s level. As I’m leaving the bus the bus driver thanks me for moving and apologises, says if someone spoke to his wife like that he’d give them a swift punch.

So my question is should I have moved in this situation and was I being unreasonable for sitting closer to the man in order that I could sit next to the buggy to give baby a bottle?

Yes, you were very unreasonable. He was already on the bus bus and you decided to sit too closely to him and just expect him to move. The need to give your baby a bottle is a complete red herring. You can do that anywhere on the bus.

Yes of course you were being unreasonable to sit to close to him.

If you needed to feed your baby, you should've taken them out of the buggy and sat somewhere further away from passengers.

Bus drivers have this headache all the time with passengers refusing to socially distance themselves.

He was there first.

Yes, you got into his space.

If he was on the bus first and you sat too near him, then YWBU. You could have sat somewhere further away and given the baby his bottle on your lap.

In my area that seat isn't allowed to be used unless it's a carer for someone in a wheelchair.

The person who you are calling a wierdo might be vulnerable. Vulnerable people sit at the front and you should be mindful of that.

But you now know that the other seat is there.

I wouldn’t have argued with a drunk man in front of my baby, I would’ve moved in order to keep us both safe

Yes he was there first but he could have easily moved to another seat and let me sit next to baby in buggy, rather than take baby out and carry him and bags to another seat where I potentially could have fallen over. It seems the same as someone giving their seat up to someone less able to stand than them in my view, common courtesy?

@Baternburg

Yes he was there first but he could have easily moved to another seat and let me sit next to baby in buggy, rather than take baby out and carry him and bags to another seat where I potentially could have fallen over. It seems the same as someone giving their seat up to someone less able to stand than them in my view, common courtesy?

YWBU. You shouldn’t have sat close to him for ANY reason. Having a baby with you doesn’t make you exempt, won’t make you unable to spread the virus nor would it prevent you from catching it from someone else.

@Temp123999 I definitely didn’t argue, I just told him no then turned away. Like I said I didn’t want to cause a scene

It's not common courtesy to expect another person to move to accommodate you, it's entitlement.

@Baternburg

Yes he was there first but he could have easily moved to another seat and let me sit next to baby in buggy, rather than take baby out and carry him and bags to another seat where I potentially could have fallen over. It seems the same as someone giving their seat up to someone less able to stand than them in my view, common courtesy?

You only had to ask the driver to hang on a minute until you were seated.

Or could could have politely asked him if he wouldn't mind moving.

It's not the as someone giving their seat up to someone less able to stand than them.

It's more equal to someone demanding a seat from someone else just because they prefer it.

Yes YABU if he was there first. I dont agree with you calling him a weirdo for pointing out your lack of social distancing either.
But it's good that you moved, you should have.

But his need for that seat may have been as big as yours. You don't know him, you don't know what's going with him or if he has physical/mental/developmental difficulties. He was their first and you entered his space and made him feel uncomfortable. He doesn't have to move, nor should he have to justify a disability to you.

Yes YABU, he was there first and he shouldn't have to move for you especially as you didn't ask him politely too

Gosh you're rude, OP. It is nothing like offering a seat to someone who isn't able to stand. Having a one year old doesn't suddenly make you disabled. It appears to have made you a rude, entitled, nasty person though.

Wow

YABU

HTH

He was right.
He could have had a hidden disability (maybe making him exempt from wearing a mask) or mobility problems you didn't see as he was already there

He may also have been a drunken "weirdo" but that's not your call to make.

Yeah you’re the one Who is unreasonable in the situation

You were being unreasonable and very entitled. By saying no you you caused a conflict, you could have apologised and moved or explained and asked the passenger if he was able to sit elsewhere. I cant thinking any reason to argue with a person you suspect is drunk whilst you have your child with you. The fact you were buying birthday cake supplies is totally irrelevant to the post, not sure why we needed to know that.

I can’t believe these answers.

OP had baby and a buggy. It does rather limit your seat choice on a bus. On a near empty bus, which right-minded unencumbered person wouldn’t just move to another seat if they wanted more space?
First come first served isn’t always right.

He was there first. You plonked yourself in his space. YABU.

@ElfAndSafetyBored

I can’t believe these answers.

OP had baby and a buggy. It does rather limit your seat choice on a bus. On a near empty bus, which right-minded unencumbered person wouldn’t just move to another seat if they wanted more space?
First come first served isn’t always right.

Should he have had to prove he was more entitled than her to the space? That's a dodgy road to take especially with the current disability discrimination over masks ongoing.

Unless he had a hidden disability, which he may have done, I don't think it would be U of you to ask if you could sit there. But I personally think you should have asked. I imagine he wouldn't have been half as grumpy if you had.