To think this mum should have been more concerned

[consideratealpaca]

Dd9 has an account on a popular online gaming platform. During lockdown she spent a reasonable amount of time playing this game with her class friends from school. One particular girl and DD have butted heads a few times and fell out, which to me seemed like normal kid like behaviour and I wasn't concerned.
Despite me trying to persuade DD not to, she opted to spend some of her birthday money on 'diamonds' to enhance her game experience. I think she spent roughly £100 in dribs and drabs, which I wasn't impressed about, but it is her money when all is said and done.
Last week she came to me and said her account had been 'hacked' and all her diamonds, special objects etc had been stolen. She was then shut out of her own account. It finally transpired that she'd given the girl in her class who she frequently argues with her log in details.
Ordinarily I wouldn't particularly care but this child has stolen the things she bought with her birthday money as well as all the credits she had accrued in game play.
The girls had a brief exchange on WhatsApp and the class friend admitted she had taken my daughters diamonds etc and then changed her password.
I'm pretty sure I can take back control of the account for her, but everything is now lost. Her friend meanwhile, has all of my daughters diamonds and credits.

I messaged the mother of the child in question and whilst the message was read, it was ignored. So I approached her in a polite and friendly way in the playground this afternoon. I was hoping that she'd be shocked at her daughter's behaviour and perhaps we'd get an apology at least. I do not want to be reimbursed for the lost money, and stated that from the start.
The mother's reaction was just to shrug and waffle about not getting involved. Am I right to be mildly pissed off, or ridiculous for making an issue of it to begin with?

Apparently I'm a 'stupid fucking tramp' and I need to stay away from her at school.

She sounds classy. Think you've done yourself and your daughter a huge favour. When she starts to shit stir don't forget to tell people her daughter was sending yours porn and stealing from her.

I know I’m late to the party here but I’d be distraught if my child stole something from another child - whether or not I thought the other child should in fact have the thing in question. Because my views on that are irrelevant.

Glad Roblox reinstated the credits.

Screenshot her message and email it to head teacher at the school and also maybe report to police for threats

DS played PC games too, just not the kind you throw small amounts of money at for months and months.

One big expenditure v lots of little ones. Same difference.

I'm shocked that you allow your daughter to spend so much money on "nothing", she's doing it to beat her friends at whatever trash game she's playing. It's not to enhance her experience. She's always going to win, If she pays for it. What an awful lesson to teach a child, the children whose parents are responsible won't stand a chance.

Load of nonsense. You can’t “win” at Roblox.

My daughter, 7, and her cousins, 6, and 11, love that game too. It's not age inappropriate. Lots of escapist fun. She just needs to learn not to reveal her profile details.
The mum sounds like she is in denial. Sure, don't get involved in petty squabbles when its not clear who's to blame, but stealing..?
That kind of attitude is going to bite that mum on the bum when her daughter is older.
Good luck. Hope your daughter gets over the betrayal.

I've blocked her now because we're just going round in circles. I seem to have really got her back up by pointing out that her parenting might be lacking somewhat, what with the porn and the theft.
I'm not sure what will happen next. She's one of those people who thrives on drama.

Load of nonsense. You can’t “win” at Roblox.*

So why pay £100 for "virtual diamonds"?

If she tries to talk to you at school, just say 'I've nothing more to say, your dd stole from my ds, it's now rectified, let's move on & keep our distance.

Good luck. I'd be shitting myself!

So why pay £100 for "virtual diamonds"?

Why buy new Lego to build? Why buy new trainsets to put on your tracks? Why buy new Playmobil figures?

If my son has a friend round to play and he has more Lego than his friend is he cheating at playing with Lego?

@Corono It's a game where you built a virtual world. You can't 'win', you purchase items for your virtual world if you want to, much like you would in the real world. Once you have those items they're yours forever, although you can trade them with others. I can't understand the outrage. It's not gambling, it's a great game for using your imagination and creativity. We actively support our children to play it.

@caughtalightsneeze so could your son not share the Lego to play together? Isn't this all about the DD having all the virtual diamonds, not sharing and not building something together to make a better Lego model?

@buckeejit

If she tries to talk to you at school, just say 'I've nothing more to say, your dd stole from my ds, it's now rectified, let's move on & keep our distance.

Good luck. I'd be shitting myself!

Thank you. She's enormous, but I suspect she's all mouth and no trousers. Plus, it's a playground...if there's any trouble on school property she'll be in massive shit.

@consideratealpaca

I'm glad your daughter got her diamonds returned to her.

My advice though is to let the school know about the blowjob photo. That's a very real worry and a safeguarding issue. I'd also be asking them to keep a close eye on the girl and DD's interactions in school, in case in turns nasty. I say this as someone who's been where you are (although different scenario) and my DD was then bullied by the other child.

@consideratealpaca so it's not a sharing game or sharing play, it's all about i have got a £100 extra, you can't come to my house and we will play a great game together (for example great lego set, which we can enjoy together building), it's all about me having more money than to you and it's all mine!!!

Crikey what happened to playing being about learning to share?

Also all your none sense about how grown up your DD is, how you keep an eye on what's she doing on line, it's clearly not working and if you think she's given her log in details but wouldn't be taken in by anyone else only her friend, you're massively naive, consider what else could happen.

[quote Corono]@caughtalightsneeze so could your son not share the Lego to play together? Isn't this all about the DD having all the virtual diamonds, not sharing and not building something together to make a better Lego model?
[/quote]
Er, no. If someone comes to play at my house I do not encourage my children to give away their toys to their friends. They play with them whilst they are there but they don't give them away. I don't believe for a second that if your child has a friend round to play you make them give away their toys so that everyone is equal.

Roblox is the same. You build a world or a game and your friends play in the game. They share with you. They don't get to take it for themselves.

Er, no. If someone comes to play at my house I do not encourage my children to give away their toys to their friends. They play with them whilst they are there but they don't give them away. I don't believe for a second that if your child has a friend round to play you make them give away their toys so that everyone is equal.

Er no I never said give away the Lego, I said build together that would include being on the same room? 🙄

Er no I never said give away the Lego, I said build together that would include being on the same room?

But the comparison you were drawing was the equivalent of giving the Lego away, not sharing it.

Of course kids share in Roblox. If you build something and your friends come and use it (in your imaginary world) then what is that but sharing?

@caughtalightsneeze er no, it wasn't! I clearly said share!

Er I have no idea why you think "share and building together" means giving away??

The point is playing in the same room together sharing a toy.

Not er giving it away!

Or er keeping it all to yourself and buying your way to being the best and not interacting and er sharing!

*Er I have no idea why you think "share and building together" means giving away??

Because in the same post you were referring to the OP s daughter keeping her £100 to herself and not sharing and in an earlier post you were talking about her using it to beat her friends.

@caughtalightsneeze Pointless arguing with her. She's clearly a much superior parent, and whatever anyone else does is wrong. There's been a lot of superiority seekers on this thread.

@caughtalightsneeze to be clear, the OPs daughter in my opinion is t sharing, she's buying her way to the top.

My point is that playing should be sharing and enjoying together? She still had £100 worth of these diamonds months after she "bought them in dribs and drabs", so why did she give her log in details away if she just could've enjoyed what she had with this friend? Why if it is for sharing and all the friends could join in, didn't she do just that?

Sounds er strange!

@consideratealpaca I agree with you!

Corono I don't think you understand what Roblox actually is. My daughter and her buddies were into it a couple of years back. They individually designed and built little houses and filled them with furniture etc. Some of this is free, some you have to pay for (my daughter only did the free stuff). Then when they would connect up to play together their little characters basically went around the little town to visit each others houses and admire the (virtual) lamps and quilt covers. It was amusingly sweet. It isn't about 'winning' or 'beating' each other. It isn't a competition.