AIBU to give my child an Irish name in the UK?

[FolkSongSweet]

Posting here for traffic. I’ve seen a few heated debates on this on baby name threads recently. I’m considering giving my child an Irish name where the pronunciation isn’t obvious from the spelling. We live in London. Will this be a huge burden to the child when they grow up/a mild annoyance, or not an issue?

(NB this issue could obviously theoretically apply to lots of names, not just Irish ones, but Irish ones are what I’m considering)

YABU - don’t give your child a tricky name
YANBU - it’s not a big deal, people will learn

Fiadh (Fia) is probably my favourite girls name besides my daughters name which I'm not saying on here

YANBU

I am also Irish and my OH is English. We live in the Midlands. For me it was really important that our children would have Irish names when they would take an English surname, and be raised in England. I didn't want my heritage lost.
I dug a name out of the history books for our DD, even in Ireland people have never heard it.

One thing I would say is that if you give your DC an Irish name in England be very prepared for it to rarely be pronounced correctly. It p*sees me off to no end because I believe it's laziness and ignorance. people, including my DDs paternal grandparents simply can't be bothered to learn to pronounce her name properly.
But don't let that deter you! Give your beautiful baby whatever name you want. And congratulations for your pending arrival.

I vote go for it. I have an Irish name, my dad was Irish and my mum is English. In the 80’s people went on about my name a lot but it’s virtually mainstream now. Apparently when my parents announced my name they got a world of stupid questions

@diplodocusinermine exactly!

You’re not naive to think your child won’t care what anybody outside family and friends think. I don’t know any people that claim to hate their name so much that they’ve legally changed it so it’s not a common problem! My first name was popular in the 80s and my maiden name is foreign- it’s a running joke that nobody can get it right but that’s what makes it kinda special. There’ll always be one or two that will claim not to know how to say/spell it every time it’s mentioned but that’s their problem not yours. It’s your baby, your choice. The world would be very boring if we all had the same name.

@FolkSongSweet

Ok so I suppose I have to take a gamble as to whether my daughter will feel the same as *@heartsonacake* or not. 🤔

Well exactly, you don’t know 🤷‍♀️ And that uncertainty along with knowing exactly what a pain in the arse it is is exactly why I would never give my children difficult to spell and/or pronounce names.

@heartsonacake a lot of people would like having a more unique name, there are enough John and Sarah's in the world.

[quote AryaStarkWolf]@heartsonacake a lot of people would like having a more unique name, there are enough John and Sarah's in the world.[/quote]
There’s a difference between unique and pain in the arse. You can give your child a unique or less traditional name that isn’t difficult to spell and/or pronounce.

There’s a middle ground.

@FolkSongSweet to give my perspective - it’s occasionally a mild annoyance to have to spell my name. It’s nothing more than that. I don’t think it will make your DC’s life less ‘easy’ in any meaningful way. They’ll have to spell it and say it when they start school but then others will learn. Likewise when they start a new job or meet new people. But it’s an occasional thing.

I find it’s often a conversation starter with mine - people will ask where it’s from and when I say it’s Irish will ask about my connection to Ireland and so on and I like that!

I also just thought. My DH has an easy to spell and pronounce English name. He still often has to respell it/repeat it when we are - for example - booking a table at a restaurant. Because often the person we are speaking to doesn’t speak English as a first language and isn’t as familiar with English names. My DH works for a company with lots of Europeans and often has to clarify his name for the same reason.

In a multicultural and diverse city like London, having an English name doesn’t mean everyone will find it easy to say or spell. I know it’s not quite the same - but honestly I wouldn’t worry about it, especially somewhere like London - I’m sure you’ll find a whole range of names in DCs school!

The other thing is I know people who hate having popular names - and I have had people tell me they wish they had a more unusual or interesting name! My friend gave her son what she thought was an unusual name, it is now one of the most popular names so you just don’t know. Any name you choose - even a more well known or ‘English’ one- is a big decision but you can’t ever be sure that your child will love the name and never have any issues with it!

My children have Irish names and my youngest is very unusual. We live in north west England. It is a conversation starter, we always get told how lovely it is. He isn't bothered in the slightest and we quite enjoy waiting for appointments to see how people will have a guess and pronounce it. He loves it (I have asked him lots of times) and I really like not having met anyone else with his name.
Currently trying to come up with another boys name we like!

Obviously up to you op but based on this thread, more people seem to have positive rather than negative experiences of an Irish or a name that is difficult to pronounce/spell.

I'd still love to know the name you're thinking of

Call your child what you want. It doesn't matter what name you give your child.
It is extremely goady and wrong to start a thread "AIBU to give my child an Irish name in the UK".
You are aware that there is a lot of anti-Irish sentiment on Mumsnet and in the UK aren't you?
You're aware that there is a lot of pro-British sentiment on Mumsnet and in the UK, aren't you?

Try again OP.

My DH and I have difficult Irish names. It’s a PITA. We live in London. Constantly explaining it, the spelling does make a difference for emails etc. Spend days getting called things that aren’t our names. When we chose a name for DS we went for an Irish BAME that was spelled exactly as it was pronounced but people still Get it wrong but at least he wasn’t spelling it constantly when he started school.

There’s a difference between unique and pain in the arse. You can give your child a unique or less traditional name that isn’t difficult to spell and/or pronounce.

There’s a middle ground.

It's acknowledging her heritage, I lived in London with a "pain in the arse name" and it never bothered me. I enjoyed explaining about it actually

No different than a hard to pronounce English name (like mine). It's a bit annoying keep having to explain how to pronounce / spell it. But it doesn't bother me much!

Both of mine have Irish names; one is traditionally Gaelic (Niamh) and the other is Gaelic but not unusual in the UK (Cara).
They go to a Catholic school where there are lots of kids of Irish heritage and their names aren't at all problematic.
We did want to call our youngest Aoibheann but decided it was just too Gaelic and that she would forever spend her life spelling it and correcting people.

@bellinisurge

Speaking as someone with an Irish Mum and an English name: do what you feel comfy with but ...

Brilliant! I always thought a good rule is don’t call your child a name that they will have to spell every time they say it. My husband has one of these names so he calls himself John at the local takeaway and in coffee shops where they take your name. I love the Irish girls names. They’re very pretty.

My name is welsh, which is a completely phonetic language and people still mispronounce it constantly- adding extra letters that aren’t there or in a couple of cases calling me a different name entirely (e.g Janice instead of Joni) Ignore them!
Call your baby what you like and they will love their unusual name!

There are so many beautiful Irish names. I think the first time she meets people they’ll struggle, then she’ll tell them and it will be fine. I wouldn’t let it put you off a name you love.

@LoveaGaelicName

Both of mine have Irish names; one is traditionally Gaelic (Niamh) and the other is Gaelic but not unusual in the UK (Cara). They go to a Catholic school where there are lots of kids of Irish heritage and their names aren't at all problematic. We did want to call our youngest Aoibheann but decided it was just too Gaelic and that she would forever spend her life spelling it and correcting people.

Yes, ours also goes to Catholic school. You hear Irish names and accents a lot in our playground. Also Italian, Spanish, Polish, Nigerian, Indian, Scottish. I don't think a little Fiadh would be out of place beside little Lorenzo and Olu. I would say at least a third of kids in DC's class at school have names which are not traditionally English. I can think of several with Irish names off the top of my head, so 🤷‍♀️.

@LookItsMeAgain

Call your child what you want. It doesn't matter what name you give your child. It is extremely goady and wrong to start a thread "AIBU to give my child an Irish name in the UK". You are aware that there is a lot of anti-Irish sentiment on Mumsnet and in the UK aren't you? You're aware that there is a lot of pro-British sentiment on Mumsnet and in the UK, aren't you?

Try again OP.

But the OP (herself Irish, so probably quite aware of the existence of anti Irish sentiment) is in the UK and wondering whether she should give her child an Irish name. What did you want her to ask instead?

Not Irish, but I have a "foreign" name that people consistently get wrong and it is really, really annoying. It's why I haven't given my own DC foreign names.

My uncle diarmuid works in a customer/client facing job seeing multiple people every day and has spent his entire professional life (in London) being known as Dermot. Even his own wife calls him Dermot, despite the fact that it's not actually his name. People are so bloody ignorant! It doesn't bother him but would drive me crackers

It's acknowledging her heritage, I lived in London with a "pain in the arse name" and it never bothered me. I enjoyed explaining about it actually

AryaStarkWolf Good for you. I was giving OP another perspective because it’s not guaranteed her daughter won’t mind.

My child once received a party invite from a child in his class who was known everyday with the English equivalent of his name. The Irish name on the invite was totally unprounceable to the extent that no-one knew who the invite was from. Many of the parents replied not even knowing the gender of the child or who the parent was even though it was a small school.
It was a lovely name but she only used it for formal occasions apparently.

@snappycamper

My uncle diarmuid works in a customer/client facing job seeing multiple people every day and has spent his entire professional life (in London) being known as Dermot. Even his own wife calls him Dermot, despite the fact that it's not actually his name. People are so bloody ignorant! It doesn't bother him but would drive me crackers

Wtf? His wife calls him Dermot ? Did he introduce himself to her like that?

Not the same, but my cousin changed her name completely when she went off to university. So we all call her, for example, Sarah, and her husband (who she met at university) and all their couple friends call her, for example, Scarlett. It was quite weird to begin with, when people were talking about Scarlett and I was like "who"? More used to it now though and she hasn't asked us to call her Scarlett, so her siblings and parents still call her Sarah. We do too.