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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to give my child an Irish name in the UK?

362 replies

FolkSongSweet · 09/09/2020 10:20

Posting here for traffic. I’ve seen a few heated debates on this on baby name threads recently. I’m considering giving my child an Irish name where the pronunciation isn’t obvious from the spelling. We live in London. Will this be a huge burden to the child when they grow up/a mild annoyance, or not an issue?

(NB this issue could obviously theoretically apply to lots of names, not just Irish ones, but Irish ones are what I’m considering)

YABU - don’t give your child a tricky name
YANBU - it’s not a big deal, people will learn

OP posts:
WhateverHappenedToMe · 09/09/2020 10:46

Once told, people should not have an issue with the pronunciation - but your child will have to spell it again and again.

As for names in London, let's just say that when running activities with children I've found myself saying "Elizabeth? That's an unusual name!"

Original poster
FolkSongSweet · 09/09/2020 10:49

@bellinisurge

Speaking as someone with an Irish Mum and an English name: do what you feel comfy with but ...

Love this @bellinisurge 🤣
OP posts:
HarryElephante · 09/09/2020 10:49

Name your kid what you like. Surely.

sleepyhead · 09/09/2020 10:50

I have personal experience of this.

If someone sees my name written down they will mispronounce it 95% of the time.
If someone hears my name they will misspell it 100% of the time.

Did it bother me growing up? Not that much - I just got used to saying to people "let me spell it for you" or correcting people when the mispronounced it.

Mostly people will remember the pronunciation, but people struggle more with remembering spelling ime.

RB68 · 09/09/2020 10:51

I think its fine - a name is a name is a name, my daughters name is an anglicized Irish name (her Grandmother calls her the Irish version) - and all her cousins bar one is an Irish name - the other cousin - well you could argue his is scottish

Original poster
FolkSongSweet · 09/09/2020 10:52

I definitely want to give my child my favourite name, but as pps have pointed out, I’m not the one who will have to live with it/constantly correct people, so I’m wondering if I’m being a bit selfish.

DH loves the name and doesn’t see an issue, but there was a thread on Irish baby names recently where a couple of posters were saying it was cruel and would make the child cringe on a daily basis and/or have to change their name, which has given me pause for thought!

OP posts:
RedRumTheHorse · 09/09/2020 10:53

@WhateverHappenedToMe

Once told, people should not have an issue with the pronunciation - but your child will have to spell it again and again.

As for names in London, let's just say that when running activities with children I've found myself saying "Elizabeth? That's an unusual name!"

That's because they are called foreign variations of Elizabeth.
Cligger · 09/09/2020 10:54

Yanbu! I have the same set up I'm Irish partner is English and I am living here permanently I have a son Cillian and daughter Clodagh. Have had a few comments but I have quickly shut them down and people love their names and love to know the heritage of them.

Emmelina · 09/09/2020 10:55

We have an Eilidh (Scottish). In our experience, others in contact with your child will just learn it, though she doesn’t correct most of the mispronunciations as they’re not terrible! (Ellie, Liddy)

Davros · 09/09/2020 10:57

I've got a traditional Irish name and have lived in London for all of my 60 years. My name is known but nearly always mispronounced but I don't mind and I'm happy to correct it if I feel like it. I'm mostly known by a nickname derived from my name which is very much more unusual

Worried74 · 09/09/2020 10:59

My name is very hard to work out from the spelling, I have found it best to spell it the simple way for work etc. Very few people even know my correct name outside of family as it is just an annoyance to constantly have to explain where it comes from etc. I am the only person in the doctor's etc called by my title and surname.
I don't like my name, I never have. My husband of 18 years never uses it.
I grew up in London but having an Irish name at that time was not great.

12309845653ghydrvj · 09/09/2020 11:00

I’m Irish living in England too—I don’t have an Irish name but I know plenty of people who do, and it’s never done them any harm! A lot of them actually make more sense phonetically than English ones (I will never learn to pronounce English place names 😅).

I’d say go for it, I think there’s something really special about keeping culture through names and as others have said it’s a conversation starter! Also Irish names are pretty (i May be slightly biased...). Also Ireland is generally looked at so positively around the world, having an Irish name or accent is a great help if you’re travelling!

AfterSchoolWorry · 09/09/2020 11:01

@bellinisurge

Speaking as someone with an Irish Mum and an English name: do what you feel comfy with but ...

Brilliant!
nosswith · 09/09/2020 11:01

I think its OK.

What I don't like is people having a name but without the traditional spelling. For example, Hollie instead of Holly.

JustHereWithMyPopcorn · 09/09/2020 11:05

@bellinisurge

Speaking as someone with an Irish Mum and an English name: do what you feel comfy with but ...

'My name contains seven silent letters' Grin Grin
BobbinThreadbare123 · 09/09/2020 11:05

I think you'll be fine. You would definitely be fine where I grew up (Liverpool - most of us have Irish blood tbf) as it's very common to see Irish names. Ignore the people who say it's mean; they just can't be arsed to spell properly! I like Welsh names too, and don't have any problems saying or spelling them.

workhomesleeprepeat · 09/09/2020 11:06

Really depends tbh. Some non English names are phonetic which makes them a lot easier for people to say - I find this applies across a number of groups.

However Irish names you have to be careful. My cousin in London has named her daughter Orlaith and now spends her life explaining to various ppl that it’s pronounced Orla

Disfordarkchocolate · 09/09/2020 11:08

I have a name you will have seen written down a lot. I have had 2 very common surnames and one that is common in some areas. I have still spent my whole life spelling out my names. It doesn't bother me at all.

AryaStarkWolf · 09/09/2020 11:09

I have an Irish name and lived in London for a while when i was younger, I did spend a lot of time explaining why my name was spelled the way it was. It didn't bother me that much though

BadSeedsComeAndGo · 09/09/2020 11:09

I was born and raised here in England and I have an Irish name. I can assure you that it does not make me cringe in any way, I like it! It’s often easier for people to remember unusual names and it’s nice that people from Ireland will start conversations with me about my heritage. Entirely ridiculous for others to suggest that members of the diaspora lead such a miserable life as a result of their non-standard names that they will have no option but to change them by deed poll as an adult!

Fink · 09/09/2020 11:09

I'm half Irish and went to a Catholic school in London, as do dc. It's very common to see Irish names. Of the white kids in our school, well over 50% will have at least one Irish grandparent. So, basically, at school, if they go to a Catholic school, they won't have a problem.

Presumably by the time they leave school they'll be able to cope with it for themselves.

IntermittentParps · 09/09/2020 11:11

Someone was talking about BAME names (I know not the same), but they said that people manage to teach their children how to say Beethoven and Tchaikovsky and the surnames of foreign footballers, so it's just ignorance and laziness on the part of adults if they claim they're so confused about a non 'native British' name.

I read this too. I don't find it that convincing as an argument though; I suspect that at least some Russian- and German-speakers wince a bit at the way a lot of English-speakers say those names. I have certainly experienced Irish people giggling/cringing at my attempts to say Irish names.

Having said that, name your child whatever you like. IME everyone has to spell/explain their name sometimes, even people with more familiarly 'English' names.

AryaStarkWolf · 09/09/2020 11:11

@Cligger

Yanbu! I have the same set up I'm Irish partner is English and I am living here permanently I have a son Cillian and daughter Clodagh. Have had a few comments but I have quickly shut them down and people love their names and love to know the heritage of them.
Peaky Blinders will have helped with the Cillian pronunciation issue anyway (although that one is really only knowing it's a hard C rather than a soft one, I don't know why anyone ever had trouble with that)
lljkk · 09/09/2020 11:12

OP: Would you be offended if your DC changed the spelling when they grown up to be more anglicised? I would anglicise the spelling if too different from English.

and before people freak out that I said that, I HAVE done this for myself. My name wasn't Irish, but I have happily let people use different spellings, pronunciations, especially when in different cultures. The only time I correct spellings is on legal/work/professional documents. Could not care less otherwise if people vary my name spelling or play with the pronunciation. Am baffled by people who are precious about such things.

AgileLass · 09/09/2020 11:16

Am baffled by people who are precious about such things.

It’s because the history of Anglicisation (and decline of the Irish language) in Ireland is a controversial one.

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