To cancel christmas

[amms36]

This year has been absolutely awful. I am not convinced that it is going to improve over the next few months either.

I have tentatively told family members that I am cancelling Christmas this year. By this I mean I won't be putting up a tree, I won't be doing any 'festive' shopping, and I won't be doing anything special for Christmas Day.

Likewise, I don't expect any gifts, or anything related to Christmas.

DH thinks this is extreme and I am being unreasonable. My point is that I have never particularly loved Christmas, and feel this year especially it feels like more trouble than it will be worth. Who knows what restrictions will even be in place come December?

You are being The Grinch .. what did you expect us all to say ??? Boo Hoo .. your choice ... lock yourself away with a pot noodle and let everyone else have fun.

I love Christmas but the thought of Christmas this year fills me with dread. Our wonderful DiL died last month leaving three under 10’s. The lockdown made her last months awful, all her pain and despair was witnessed by the children. I know we'll have to make an effort for their sake. I can hardly bear the thought of her not being with us. I just want this year over.

Why not adapt rather than cancel?

I agree especially if you don’t have kids

I’ve been trying to persuade my DS 8 yo that Santa is in lockdown but no success so far

if your your not looking forward to it change it.Christmas is meant to be a celebration with family.lol the corner cutting i do to make christmas dinner i cook meat in the slow cooker,veg in the steamer,use ready made yorkshires and so forth.

Just get one of those mini pre decorated fake trees for the table or sideboard .If its just your other half and you say i want to compromise and take it down a notch.One big gift each rather than lots of them,order online and make a nice meal or better yet something that can be shoved in the oven.Christmas does not need to be fancy just a cosy night with the ones you love and care about

It sounds more a case that Christmas isn't what you normally want it to be and you've found an excuse to just wash your hand if it. Why not have a more honest Christmas? A nice meal. Minimal presents. Hibernating. A lot of people just do that?

why are you having no trees, decorations etc, ? what on earth difference does it make if the virus is still around or not, we need something to cheer us up for goodness sake

...Fa la la la la....even if non religious,and skint yabu. In time of uncertainty???????like the end of the world is nigh???cos,even THAT would make a one carp day annual event...markBle.even if "the last one".I'm not oblivious to the misery pandemics thrown at us.agree NO need for elaborate decos,or extravagant gifts or lushbanquet.travel\peopiling may or may not be possible. Gifts Are non essential...can you and mr75%less $ not download TomTom\put your fAce in a music video app n multi send reli.s gift =one reason to smile.even a lounge picnic blanket tea of cheese n pickle sandwiches 19p fizzy lemonade in paper cup wi cocktail umbrella n maraschino cherry for effect...is did all "effort"..no stress required,don't celebrate,cancel all merriment...have no christmas.EVERY day can be remarkable if u choose.bah humbug

It seems to me that you don’t like Christmas and this is a good excuse to opt out completely . If your income has fallen then it’s perfectly reasonable to tell the people you normally buy for that you won’t be doing so this year or will be doing token gifts but it’s just being a misery to not do decorations etc .

It's up to you and your dh. Maybe if he wants a full Christmas dinner he could cook it?
Personally if it was just me and my dh I would suggest we buy each other a token gift, have a special meal at home together and put up a few basic decorations. Eat loads of chocolate and binge watch crap Christmas TV. (I'm actually envious of this idea) I'm not visiting family this year either. Its rubbish but I don't feel things will be better by then.

If you want to cancel Christmas and it doesn't affect anyone else I don't see a problem with it. All the things that make the build up to Christmas enjoyable seem to be being cancelled this year, and it is only the build up that I enjoy, I can't stand the actual day. However, if it is going to spoil things for your DH then that is a different matter.

Christmas is the celebration of the birth of Christ. If that isn't something to celebrate and I don't know what is.
You don't need a lot of money to celebrate, perhaps just tone it down.

We don’t celebrate Christmas but do spend the day with family as it’s usually the day of the year when everyone is off work.
X
Do it the way you want; it shouldn’t be this big pressure to spend more than you can afford / celebration of consumerism / whatever you’re seeing it as that is putting you off it xx

I HATE Xmas. Know why. Because Jesus is not included anymore in most celebrations. It is a stuff your face, spend all your spare cash, pigfest.

Ive not read your whole thread but to reflect on last year for my family it couldn't have been any worse. I lost my mum on 21st December after a horrible illness. It truely devastated the whole family. It would have been so easy to cancel the whole thing but we came together as a family and spent the whole day together (as we would have done if she had been with us). It would have been what she had wanted and we all had children to consider too. Obviously it was difficult and nowhere near the same and lots of gin was drunk but I'm so glad we carried on. This year we've decided to do the same (with much less gin!) and make sure that we make it extra special especially as we've not been able to see each other as much with covid about. Keep an open mind OP.

It is entirely your choice op.
What I would say is, it has been an awful year foe everyone. However, it could be worse! Celebrate what is good. I was diagnosed with cancer just before lockdown and have had to go through chemo, radiotherapy therapy and surgery alone...looking forward to making homemade gifts with my kiddos and making special memories is what is lifting my spirits. It's all a case of how you look at things. Not half full or half empty but lucky you have a glass in the first place. Be happy whatever you do x

I agree with you in many ways. The whole palaver of buying and wrapping loads of presents, cooking huge quantities of rich food and drinking too much is not really enjoyable for those of us who do the work, let alone a reasonable thing to do if you're having a hard time financially.
I'm hoping that we can keep things simpler this year. However I would always get presents for my children and grandchildren. Typically I get my children something useful that they need but probably wouldn't buy for themselves - something for the kitchen, bathroom or garden perhaps?
I had flu at Christmas a couple of years ago whilst my husband went to stay with family. I had a lovely time eating food I liked and watching TV I chose.

I see your point and think everyone should only what they are comfortable doing, not 'forced' or 'guilt tripped' into doing what other people think. Christmas is a stressful time regardless and Covid-19 won't make it any easier.
Unless you plan to eat out as a family on the day
everything else demands wearing a mask, shopping, visiting etc. The joy goes out of any activity when wearing a mask...IMO.
None of my children live nearer than a 3 hour drive away, some a lot further.
I have not seen any of them since last November due to my having Coronavirus from Dec to end of Feb and too exhausted to drive any long distance for some weeks after the cough ceased.
As they live so far away they have formed bubbles in their own areas and I would have to stay in a hotel which I would not want to do.
I'd rather stay home and just treat myself and send each family a box of gifts and a hamper.
Next year might be better...hopefully. 🤞🙂

*only do.

If its a joint decision between you and your husband fair enough but what are you going to do for the younger members of the family ( the ones you said you normally visit) ? Actually i dont want to know the answer because my sister did the same thing to my children it was awful having to explain why aunt has turned into aunt Grinch especially when they had spent half the year saving up to buy her something nice

Attention seeking really suits you. @amms36

Why not just keep it modest? I mean you can send e-cards and tell everyone it’s going to be small gifts this year or a Secret Santa. You really don’t have to go overboard but can still make it a bit of an occasion. A bottle of wine doesn’t cost much and you could do a simple meal and then go walking or something. It sounds like you have low mood and I really do understand that. Perhaps try to see you GP? We don’t do big Christmases because we don’t really like it that much. One year we went on a 5 mile walk, dropped into a pub on the way back and then had a nut roast at 4.00. We watched a film and went to bed but it was a really nice day.

In our family it will be different but doesn’t have to be awful. We’re going to use the opportunity to get back to basics with secret Santa, handmade gifts etc being with family how ever we can come December. Pick the things about Christmas that make you happy and loose the rest.

It's going to just be me and my kids for Christmas because I don't like going to others on the day and my immediate family live abroad. But even if it was just me I'd still do a tree and have a special meal. It's a beautiful day, even if you don't believe in the religious aspect it's a time to look back and look ahead and if you have your health and a home you are better off than many!
And don't assume things will get worse, they might get better!

Well it is your choice. I understand your reasons for not holding it. If you had children then it is different. It has been a crap year but people need something to look forward to in life.