AIBU to think teachers should not be teaching sex games to children?

[2fallsagain]

Article In today's Times about teaching resources for RSE from the proud trust.

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/government-gives-pupils-sex-advice-on-the-roll-of-a-dice-80hmsplws

In summary "The government has funded a tool kit written by the Proud Trust, an LGBT charity, which includes dice featuring words such as “anus”, “vulva”, “penis” and “hands and fingers”. Children are encouraged to throw the dice twice and talk about the sexual acts that can happen using the two body parts".

AIBU to think this is deeply inappropriate and any school using Proud Trust resources needs investigating? WTF is the government doing funding pornographic material for children?

Anyone concerned about the normalisation of anal sex for young girls is being reasonable. Anyone calling those concerned homophobic is being sexist and either ignorant or naive. A girl of 16 has a colostomy bag after her porn addicted boyfriend got a group of friends and had rough anal, ‘consensual’ sex with her.

I don’t care what names I’m called by stupid people with no idea of what is going on out there. The anus is not self lubricating. Girls, teenagers, are coming in with injuries after anal sex they haven’t enjoyed. I’m sick of being told we can’t discuss it. If this ‘games’ is not covering the dangers, the fact this is primarily of enjoyment for males not females, and the common injuries from anal, then that is wrong.

@TheHappyHerbivore nothing I said was homophobic. Vulgar, maybe. I'll admit to that. You didn't address my other point. But you seem to think that this male-centric 'sex dice game' and the accompanying document are positive, so it's unlikely we will agree on anything here.

Nothing in the OP or subsequent posts by @2fallsagain implies that she only wants heteronormative sex taught about.

Pure deflection on the part of certain posters.

Don’t you think it would be better not to talk about sex as something degrading and objectifying?

This material does most of that. Disembodied parts inserted into other parts - no human attached. Certainly no reference to emotion. Or the fact that the human owner of the anus might want to say no.

Maybe, alongsde all of this 'understanding' some people need to remember that boundaries need to be taught rather than normalisation of ALL sexual acts.

Yes, this

There's a lot of 'not in good faith' stuff going on out there regarding the sexualisation of children's lives, and this ideology's proponents will pop up anonymously and without fail, all wide-eyed and faux innocent, on threads like this to try to make real concerned parents and teachers look and feel bad.

Where's the harm in discussing school teaching materials and teaching methods? Why is that so rage-provoking for some?

Don’t you think it would be better not to talk about sex as something degrading and objectifying?

That’s the reason people object to this game. Stop calling people homophobic for being concerned about the way girls are taught about and expected to engage in anal at a young age, when it’s something that is not usually that pleasurable for females.

Agree thousands

Many women do not even orgasm from penetrative sex.

I mean is there even anything in there about hygiene. Or can penisies and objects be inserted in every orifice without even cleaning in between or changing the condom.

How many kids are going to take any of it seriously presented as a game ffs

Sex is serious. It has consequences and most of all it should be consensual and pleasurable and legal and safe.

This absolutely will jusy encourage kids to do things that exceed their boundries because if you can talk about it in class together as a game and brainstorm about what can fit where with enough lube then of course kids who don't what to do it will feel like they are boring.

Half of it won't even feel good for any of them. All basically porn fantasies . Thats not what sex is about.

And let me speak up for all the shy girls (and boys). I would have been completely silenced and mortified by being required to play this “game” at any age in secondary school.

And I can bet that it would have been the basis for teasing and bullying from the moment we left the classroom.

I’m of the generation that got the first Rubella shots at school. The general cat-calling from the boys about why girls had to have these vaccinations was Neanderthal.

YANBU, OP.

Teach kids about sex, absolutely. Keep it respectful, factual and informative.

The counter argument seems to rely a lot on using 'prude' as an insult. We're talking about sex education for children; prudishness means extreme caution - a sensible position, I would say. Sex Ed isn't done to be cool or down with the kids. We're doing it for their benefit, their health and well being.

@Roswellconspiracy

Hygiene?! They are saying that rubbing anuses and vulvas together can be fun

I don’t get why boys are calling girls who don’t want anal sex ‘homophobic’? It’s bullying by mantra. And those poor girls with internal injuries after anal sex - and teen mags merrily promoting it without any warnings.

Well some people on this thread love anal and therefore it’s fantastic for young girls to have it served up to them as just one more risk-free pain-free bit of fun. Makes you v popular with boys too so 🤷🏼‍♀️

nothing I said was homophobic. Vulgar, maybe. I'll admit to that.

Yes, it was. I’ve explained quite clearly why - and you obviously understood me, because you subsequently changed your language.

I didn’t say the resource was positive - I said I would need to actually see it to decide that. The fact that it doesn’t seem to include clitoris and nipples is problematic, so I’m reserving judgment.

What I do think is that comprehensive sex education which recognises all forms of sex, and not just vaginal penetration, is incredibly important, and that the parents saying children are too young or should explore these issues for themselves with their partners or are being groomed by their education are completely failing to realise that they’re absolutely leaving their kids to the wolves on this; if children don’t learn in the safety of a classroom with a trained educator, they learn from the internet, their friends and the people pressuring them for sex. If you trust those ‘resources’ more than you trust sex ed, or if you simply want to bury your head in the sand and pretend that if it’s never mentioned your kids will never know about anal sex, you’re setting your children up for difficulties.

YANBU. I think it normalises anal sex which is not something many women want to do.

@Mollscroll

Well some people on this thread love anal and therefore it’s fantastic for young girls to have it served up to them as just one more risk-free pain-free bit of fun. Makes you v popular with boys too so 🤷🏼‍♀️

It's not painless. Can you imagine a young boy with no skills trying this on a young woman? Not a good idea.

As PPs have said - this is more damaging shit for young girls. Girls need to be taught that many adult women (with great sex lives) don't do a lot of these things. You don't have to put objects inside you or let someone touch your anus. You don't even have to put your mouth on someone's penis.

They should be taught to prioritise what feels nice (and safe) for them and that may be a simple as someone stroking the inner thigh or nipples or touching their clitoris.

The teenage years are a really important time for girls to figure out what makes them tick. And that is best done with either a very caring boyfriend/girlfriend or alone. Learning about sex through this dice is a sure fire route to faking orgasms for the rest of your life.

Hygiene?! They are saying that rubbing anuses and vulvas together can be fun

The uti after wont be

Most of us have been watching these things unfold fir years. Called all sorts of names and accused if all sorts.

This thread shows that its all done its job. Precisely what we tried to warn everyone about. None of us are against good sex education. Children need it to be safe and learn boundaries and empower them to say no. We want them to learn that its ok to be gay or lesbian or too believe it or not. This is nothing to do wirh sexuality. This will harm boys and girls whatever their sexual orientation. I fear for the painful non pleasurable sexual encounters they will be coerced into by people who have put any form of safety or pleasure at the bottom of the pile

@TheHappyHerbivore

No, you've told me why YOU think what I said was homophobic. I completely disagree. In fact what I was actually saying is that we should stop assuming all gay men indulge in anal, as that's not the case, and could actually be a harmful stereotype. If you want to take issue with my language, fine,but you're really reaching if you think anything I've said is 'phobic'. So I used some vulgar language, big deal.

I know someone who, for nearly 20 years has been employed to go into schools, and teach (mostly girls) that it is OK to say no, and that anal sex is not an appropriate way to be popular while avoiding pregnancy.

She teaches respect for self, and others.

It's a major health concern in her locality.

As for this new "game"... I am just glad my children are older. The whole thing just sounds horrific.

I think you might need to look at the whole resource. A sothers have said it does normalise anal sex, has a focus on male expression and seems to miss out most of the female erogenous zones

^This

I've also seen the whole pack and it screams "by men for men". If you use the pack in a class it biases the discussion to male bodies, male pleasure.

It "normalises" anal in the sense of making it harder for girls and boys to set boundaries rather than giving them the tools and insights and understanding to both understand this is a part of life for some but its also entirely ok to say "no".

Unsurprising that this male body biased game is funded from a tax supposed to support women and girls. Lets not forget Osborne cheerfully handed over large chunks of the budget to lobby groups opposing basic women's reproductive rights.

@Roswellconspiracy totally agree. There is definitely an agenda here and it has zero to do with sexuality. But 'LGBT rights' has long since become about men's rights to be honest, and not in any way protecting the rights of gay, lesbian and bi people, so why am I not surprised. Be inclusive OR ELSE. and if you call out any safeguarding issues you are labelled as being a 'phobe' of some variation.

@CaffeineInfusion yes I also know someone whose job it is to teach sex ed at schools and she says many, many girls are engaging in anal sex because of pressure from their boyfriends and a fear of getting pregnant (because their boyfriend won't use a condom).

The problem is porn. Porn reduces human sex down to it's soulless (often pleasure-less) component parts (penis in vagina, penis in anus, penis in mouth) exactly as this dice does. Girls have almost no understanding of what pleasurable sex looks like for women.

Well the proper lesbians have penises now so the female pleasure zones are obsolete