AIBU to think teachers should not be teaching sex games to children?

[2fallsagain]

Article In today's Times about teaching resources for RSE from the proud trust.

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/government-gives-pupils-sex-advice-on-the-roll-of-a-dice-80hmsplws

In summary "The government has funded a tool kit written by the Proud Trust, an LGBT charity, which includes dice featuring words such as “anus”, “vulva”, “penis” and “hands and fingers”. Children are encouraged to throw the dice twice and talk about the sexual acts that can happen using the two body parts".

AIBU to think this is deeply inappropriate and any school using Proud Trust resources needs investigating? WTF is the government doing funding pornographic material for children?

onebigfoot great post.
Uses money earned from taxing women's bodily functions to fund something not actually aimed at girls but seemingly aimed at removing their boundaries. How much better would it have been if money from women was used to teach girls that porn isn't normal. The commodification of women"s bodies isn't ok. That staying safe and having strong boundaries is actually what young girls need in an increasingly pornified society. That saying no to teenage boys and older men on the internet when requests for nudes and anal are made is fine and what is in their best interests.

This is exactly what I think too.

There are some tenuous links between the Proud Trust and Peter Tatchell - who has tried to get the age of consent lowered to age 9. See his writing on adults raping children ('consensual sex' with children is rape)

Isn't he involved with educate and celebrate? Another organisation used by schools for diversity stuff?

If I'm.wrong I'm happy to be corrected

There are some tenuous links between the Proud Trust and Peter Tatchell - who has tried to get the age of consent lowered to age 9.

I was going to ask about his involvement. I’ve seen a recorded video from not that long ago where he talks about this, someone could find it... he says that he had friends who engage in sexual ‘relationships’ with adults at 9 and feel as adults that it was fine etc so who are we to question? WTF. That’s a big red flag. Yet he goes into schools to teach children and discuss sex education with them? So wrong.

@MillyMollyFarmer

Thanks for saying what my sleep-deprived brain was trying to say but not managing it. My gay friends say that there's a lot of pressure/expectation on them to do anal just because it's assumed that's what gay men do. I don't know any young girls but I can only imagine what the pressure on them is like due to porn, etc. This whole thing is so damaging.

my goodness as LGBT charity! OP sounds as if she wants to bring back section 28.

Oh stop it. The objection is that a tampon tax meant to be for helping women and girls, was given to a LGBT charity... who then used it for sex Ed that most find inappropriate, focused on male pleasure and not covering consent adequately.

Do you see any women’s charities getting into sex Ed and receiving £100,000 for it? Genuine question. Please show me a women’s charity that does this because I bet it covers consent and safety better than this does.

@ArabellaScott

Consent first and last; what grooming /sexual bullying looks like (it looks like people who say “Don’t Be Such A Prude”)

This. I hope kids are also taught about how words like 'prude' are used to push/erode and dismiss boundaries and undermine informed consent.

Exactly.

From the way a lot of men behave towards women, we have a real unmet need for teaching boys, and thuse who identify as boys, to form and maintain respectful relationships with partners. And also how to deal with break ups and mental health problems that might result from that.

Do we really need to coach children in sexual techniques? Surely that's taking away part of the fun in learning as a couple. No one needs to have part of their innocent inexperience removed by the state as a precursor to having sexual relationships.

My gay friends say that there's a lot of pressure/expectation on them to do anal just because it's assumed that's what gay men do

^ this, absolutely. I think people here are ignorant of this and it’s concerning those who say they do sex ed seem to be unaware. There are a significant number of young gay boys who do not want to do this but feel it’s the only option or an expected one, they can’t see a fulfilling relationship without doing something they don’t like or find painful. I don’t know why it’s homophobic to have an honest conversation about anal and the safety issues involved, and the pressures on young people of both sexes and different sexualities, because of porn.

Allison Bailey sums this up perfectly in her tweets this morning: twitter.com/bluskyeallison/status/1300360503362019328?s=21

Thanks for saying what my sleep-deprived brain was trying to say but not managing it. My gay friends say that there's a lot of pressure/expectation on them to do anal just because it's assumed that's what gay men do. I don't know any young girls but I can only imagine what the pressure on them is like due to porn, etc

So its yet again something pushed by porn addled straight men?

So gay men don't benefit from this.
Lesbians sure don't
Girls - well not course not. No surprise.

Remind me again who benefits?

And its all.ok cos its an lgbt charity who can hide it all behind bigotry accusations

Allison Bailey sums it up well:

What the Proud Trust, a so called LGBT charity has produced for RSE is a pornified, sex game for children that will be a delight to child sex offenders. It will encourage children to view sexual intimacy as just a series of acts, devoid of consent or intimacy.

I wouldn't want to 'play that game now' with anyone I'm not in a sexual relationship with and I'm definitely no prude!

That is NOT suitable for young teens to be playing at all, but especially not forced in a group environment.

WTAF?

We can blame open for a lot of issues (far too much 'expected' as the norm these days) but supposedly responsible adults, not in the poem industry, are responsible for this being in schools.

WTAF are they thinking???

Is this actually being used in schools? Are there any parents of teenagers, or secondary school teachers, who are on this forum and have experience of it? Or is it just that it exists somewhere and being hyped up by the media? I can't help being reminded of the media hysteria in the 80s over teachers supposedly forcing 'Jenny Lives with Eric and Martin' onto young children, whereas in fact it was in a couple of London libraries but not taught in schools at all.

If it is indeed being used in schools, I'd be a bit worried: not because I think it would be teaching young people much that they don't know already, but because it would be hell to maintain any sort of classroom discipline while playing such a game, and could result in young people teasing or in the worst case sexually harrassing each other or even the teacher.

But most kids HAVE heard of non-'standard' sexual practices. I was a rather naive and sheltered teenager in the 70s, and I certainly knew in theory about oral and anal sex. Oh, and even then, in those ancient times: we did actually know that people could be transgender: Jan Morris' 'Conundrum' had recently been published, with loads of publicity.

Maybe this particular game is misguided, if well intentioned but I've read a great deal that says girls, in particular, are amazed to discover that sex is supposed to be enjoyable. I think the more education kids receive the better. There is so much fear and taboo which causes huge amounts of vulnerability and unhappiness in the future. Talking about things and giving body parts and sex acts their proper names is not encouraging things to happen (which they will be anyway), it's ensuring kids are informed so they can make proper decisions and become empowered in their own sexual health, agency and wellbeing.

@nolongersurprised

The argument that “they will learn it about porn in the playground so let’s teach it in schools” is a terrible one.

Because of porn girls and boys need to learn about boundaries and consent and emotions. Not - let’s get creative and rub our anuses together.

Agree that it’s been created by men, for men.

This. SRE in schools should be the antidote to what is on the internet not encouraging and feeding it.

Maybe this particular game is misguided, if well intentioned but I've read a great deal that says girls, in particular, are amazed to discover that sex is supposed to be enjoyable.

Well, this will make it even worse. A number of teenage boys struggle to find the clitoris - this omits it altogether.

Maybe this particular game is misguided, if well intentioned but I've read a great deal that says girls, in particular, are amazed to discover that sex is supposed to be enjoyable. I think the more education kids receive the better

No one is against sex education. This isn't educational though. Theres no mention of anything that might be pleasurable for girls.

And some of the combinations are weird ideas of what gay/lesbian couples get up to in the heads of straight men who watch too much porn.

@nostaples

Maybe this particular game is misguided, if well intentioned but I've read a great deal that says girls, in particular, are amazed to discover that sex is supposed to be enjoyable. I think the more education kids receive the better. There is so much fear and taboo which causes huge amounts of vulnerability and unhappiness in the future. Talking about things and giving body parts and sex acts their proper names is not encouraging things to happen (which they will be anyway), it's ensuring kids are informed so they can make proper decisions and become empowered in their own sexual health, agency and wellbeing.

What in this game teaches girls that sex is supposed to be enjoyable? As I am other posters have pointed out, it doesn't even mention the clitoris

It does once. Calls it the external clitoris.

Where the fuck is the internal clitoris ?

@littlbrowndog

It does once. Calls it the external clitoris.

Where the fuck is the internal clitoris ?

Apparently the prostate. Learn something new every day.

It doesn’t even mention breasts or nipples

@MillyMollyFarmer

Gay kids are entitled to learn about anal sex in the same way heterosexual kids are entitled to learn about PIV sex, without it being labelled a kink

Would you stop trying to paint this as homophobic. Anal isn’t something all gay men do, no lesbians do it and most women don’t- plenty do it under pressure because it’s normalised despite not being enjoyable for most of us. I’ve discussed this with my male gay friends plenty of times and I’ve heard horrific stories of even minor injuries or problems caused because of engaging in it- like regular leakage. Is that being taught? Sorry but I don’t support sacred castes or not talking about things because gay people engage in it therefore it’s untouchable. That’s dumb and an insult to gay people.

School is meant to teach the basics in sex Ed.

All of this!

Much better to keep young adults in total ignorance so that they don't question sexual abuse or inappropriate behaviour

No one is disagreeing with sex ed in schools, just that they don't agree this is a positive or appropriate way to go about it. Is that allowed?

Talking about sex acts is important for teaching. Would you prefer we just told them sex is dirty and they should never do it?!