To find my mother's obsession with being "posh" really bloody annoying

[EmilyRH]

My mother seems to have an obsession with everyone thinking she is "posh" and I'm starting to find it really bloody annoying. This morning she asked to take my son to McDonald's next week (his naughty favourite!) and I made a joke asking if she was getting me McDonald's too her response, "You can eat in the rough McDonald's where you live, I will take DS to the posh McDonald's around my area." There is a posh McDonald's? 😂 She is constantly telling everyone how nice the area she lives in is (and how not nice mine is!), how the people are "just different" where she lives, how they dress better, etc. I've noticed when we go out, she will be very polite to staff if we are eating in a fancy restaurant, but rude and ignorant to staff in a fast food place, for example. This really bothers me. I've tried to ignore it over the years but she seems to be getting worse. Why is she so fixated on people thinking she is some kind of upper class?! The irony is, she was on benefits my whole childhood!

Also, get your son to start calling her Granny/Grandma/Nanna Hyacinth.

God love her, with her hierarchy of McDonalds... 🤦‍♀️
What's with McDonalds being your child's naughty favourite, though? What's that nonsense about?

Terry and June are alive and well. Tell her to move to Weybridge or Carshalton Beeches.

Mind you, someone told me they lived in the "posh end" of Fife recently.... I spat my tea out, then realised she was serious. Posh end of Fife???

Personally as someone possibly of your mums generation,i wouldnt take any grandkids of mine to any Mcdonalds.There is no such thing as a posh Mcdonalds and they all serve rubbish fast food.Surely noone really "posh" wouldnt go anywhere near Mcdonalds.Im not posh and i wouldntlol

@twoshedsjackson it would have been lost on her. Because she never viewed herself as trying to be a (perceived) better class than she was. Inside she was still a working class city girl I guess.

Buy her a step ladder for Christmas and tell her she can take it with her to Macdonald's so she can look down on people more easily.

The McDonald’s in Oxford on the headington roundabout is a posh one in an old pub building

Just remembered I was in McDonald’s in Times Square and I overheard a customer asking for ‘silverware’
Now that is POSH

She is probably ashamed of her past being poor.

I remember popping into a 'Posh' McDonald's in NYC back in the mid 1990's possibly Wall Street or 5th Avenue (too long ago to remember exactly where) which had a pianist dressed in black tie playing a baby grand piano, I think there was a liveried doorman too.
The menu was still the same as any other McDonald's.

Wait...You guys don’t have McCafes in the UK?
That’s what DH calls posh Maccas.

As it it has couch seating, proper cafe coffee served in mugs if sitting in, cakes and pastries as well as usual food and they bring your food to the table, less Ronald McDonald decoration and designed to be more upmarket etc

It’s nicer than normal.

I am longing to know whether she is more polite to the staff in the posh McDonald's compared to the rough one

It’s hard to ignore comments like that. For example my ex MIL said as my neighbours were moving in, that cars a bit nice for round here (was a Merc) and sounded shocked that I was renting private and not a council house. Riled me but she’s making up for her son being a loser who has done nothing for his daughter.

The McDonalds near us (not in UK) has a "vip" area that is roped off from the hoi polloi.

It has red velvet banquettes and is proper table service with waiters and cutlery! I strongly suspect that you can get wine there too!

My late Mum had "Hyacinth like" tendencies.

However I am having a real giggle as doing the family tree as I am finding she is descended from factory workers, coal miners and labourers. They lived many to a house in slum areas and some of her Mums family were bkrn in the workhouse!!

I find it hilarious - like why???
You grew up with them so know the 'reality' as such....how do they look us in the eye and act like that?

we grew up northern, working class, large family etc....elder sibling married a 'middle class' guy from 'down south'......suddenly she started pronouncing bath as "barth" and the separate toilet was the "qazi"

she lives in an ok area, i wouldn't call it middle class either.
it does have a pavement with "trees on it" on it though so this makes it so much 'better' than the house a girl was just moving into.

i lived in a council flat with peeling walls and damp - surrounded by an enclosed communal wraparound garden, on a small 'council estate'......she was furious when she saw it....i saw her face darken, eyes kinda bulge and the mouth harden - then she sat like a moody cow on my couch slagging off my home...

I've noticed when we go out, she will be very polite to staff if we are eating in a fancy restaurant, but rude and ignorant to staff in a fast food place, for example.

Baws. I was warming to her up to this point.

Inverted snobbery at it's finest.🤣
Personally I'd find this really amusing, but I can understand it's difficult to live with.
In fact, Bouquet comes to mind, or Bucket if you prefer.
I would just ignore it if I was you, I wouldn't make someone else's problem mine.

@Anyonebut

Was it this Mc Donalds?

Where is that?!?🤣

My mother was a huge snob, you can't go out looking like that, what will the neighbours think, used to rock up at school looking like princess Margaret, with hat and long gloves. She's knocking 90 now with Alzheimer's and can't remember the people she wanted to impress.

She somehow managed to bring up four kids who don't give a flying fuck what anyone thinks.

@monkeymonkey2010 I am laughing at your mother thinking that 'khazi' was a posh word for toilet!

@Alwaysinpain, yes! At Piazza di Spagna in Rome. I was there over 20 years ago, couldn't believe it!

@Tomasinabombadil

I remember popping into a 'Posh' McDonald's in NYC back in the mid 1990's possibly Wall Street or 5th Avenue (too long ago to remember exactly where) which had a pianist dressed in black tie playing a baby grand piano, I think there was a liveried doorman too. The menu was still the same as any other McDonald's.

Like putting lipstick on a pig 😂

@josbd yes! The north east is posh. St Andrews, Newport on Tay, Guardbridge, Crail etc

[quote Zaphodsotherhead]@monkeymonkey2010 I am laughing at your mother thinking that 'khazi' was a posh word for toilet![/quote]
Exactly! Khazi is pretty rough Cockney slang, isn’t it?

Though actually it’s funnier when raging snobs get things wrong, like the poster up the thread whose social-climber mother kept insisting her toddler say ‘Pardon’.