how old were you when you had your children

[thedaywewillremeber]

I had ds1 at 21 ds2 24 ds3 at 28. Did you feel too old or too young? Or was the age just right for you. I feel that it would have been better for me if I had had my first at 28.

I had mine at 24 and 26 . I was ready for them then , I was all I'd ever wanted. Now they are in their 30's and I can enjoy them as adults as well and be young enough help with my 2 grandchildren

I was 27 and DH was 24. We were younger than our friends (they still haven't had children and we are now early 30s) so in that respect it has been a bit lonely. However I always wanted children in my twenties so I would be in my physical prime for the pregnancy and baby/toddler years. I also want to be a younger, active grandparent if at all possible.

24. I would not use the term regret but I do wonder what like had of been like if I had waited another 5 years. The plan was always to be a younger mum though.

DC1 - 19 (only just)
DC2 - 24

34 and 36, but with multiple miscarriages before each one. I don't think I would have been ready for the impact of children in my twenties, but I do wish I'd started trying a couple of years earlier after I got married.

I forgot to add, I do wish I was a few years older before I had DC1 but don't ever regret my choice. I always wanted a smaller age gap too but with only being 19 and it being unplanned, it wasn't going to happen.

26 & 28. So glad I had them close together, and before I was 30. I'm looking forward to having adult children in my 50's and being able to enjoy life a little - maybe even becoming a relatively young grandmother if they decide to have children in their 20's too.

18 and just lost another at 39

27. Seemed very young to me. She's 23 now.

@Port1aCastis

18 and just lost another at 39

I'm so sorry

I was 19 with my first and 26 with my fourth/last.

I know more about them now than then, but I knew I was taking some medical and other risks having mine young, and I've had some physical repercussions from that (and spending a decade pregnant and/or breastfeeding).

There are times I've debated whether it would have been better to follow the research and waited for the 'golden zone' (time with the least risks and things are most likely to go well for mother and baby in the short- and long-term) of 24-34 as if I could change anything. Now, I'm content with our choices. Yes it was risky and some of those risks have bitten me in the ass, but the benefits (kids knowing many of their relatives that have since died, being out of the toddler phase before I was 30, not fearing the tales of early menopause in the family would make choices for me) have been more than enough and I feel I'm very lucky to have met someone so family-focused, compatible with me, and caring young enough to do all this and that it's gone so well.

I try to impress on my kids that my and their father's choices were risky, but thankfully have had far more benefits & not everyone who tries the same ends up so well and that many aren't in that position or would even think those benefits are worthwhile and that's fine too. It's all about balancing risks, responsibilities, and benefits for ourselves.

35 & 37

I sometimes wish for them I’d had them in my 20s when I was young and fun, but then I was also skint and having a great time travelling, building my career and learning how to be in good relationships. I didn’t meet DH til I was 33 and it was worth the wait.

20 and 22.
Like previous posters, wouldn't change them for the world but I do wish I had been older, for their benefit more than anything. I'm much more patient and set up now.

30 and 34. Ideally I think I would have preferred to have had them a year or so younger, and maybe with a slightly smaller gap. But overall it's worked for us. And in my area I'm actually pretty young to be a mum!

19
21
25
28

I’m currently pregnant at 32, will be 33 when I give birth. I’m in my perfect situation in terms of relationship, job and house but wish I’d been there at 29. I’d like a second child but don’t really want to be over 35! Doesn’t leave me long!

35. First time I was pregnant I was 29. I had 2 more losses and a failed fertility treatment in between before my second successful ivf. So ideally a few years younger but it was fine. Fertility issues not age related

I was the first of my friends and the second in my family to breed and in fact dhs side mostly had their kids 3-5 years later so I felt positively spritely!

Just the one so far and I was 24 (now 28)
I felt slightly young and I wanted to enjoy my sons baby/toddler years without feeling like I was rushing it to have another child.
I want to wait until I’m at least 29/30 to try for my next child as I only want two in total.

@TwizzledTurkey

That was my thinking- if you start a bit earlier you can space them out and enjoy their baby years more, rather than having to cram them all in a few years later down the line.

My first and last (naturally) at 42 ❤️

Dd1 at 23 and DDs 2 and 3 ( twins ) at 42. 23 was not too young in that I had tonnes of energy and sailed through the sleepless nights but my relationship was not the right one and we weren't financially secure. At 42 I was physically drained and exhausted but my relationship ( not same father as Dc1) is strong and stable and we are financially more secure. In summary, neither were entirely wrong or right!

19

And just turned 21 with second

1 dc, had him at 40y

No regrets about leaving it later. We're financially good, I don't have to work, and I had a ball in my 20s and 30s.

20 - DD1
25 - DS1
29 - DD2
Wish they where closer together but I lost 4 in between so wasn't meant to be. DD2 starts school next week it will be so strange not having any at home in the day. I have no plans for any more.