List of rules making me feel on edge

[Ziggyzaggy]

My daughter has been home since march and will be going into year one next week. The school said that they will be in a class bubble before the summer holidays. They made it clear that the kids would just be mixing in that one class. I was fine with it and because she's in with her best friend I know she'll be happy. We've just had a long email from the headmaster with all the new rules and guidance and plans in place. Basically the kids will be going through the fire exits into the classroom. They won't be allowed to use the corridors. They have decided that despite the government saying they don't need to social distance in bubbles that they are going to make them social distance anyway. they've decided that children can't touch each other in the bubble and no-contact games will be allowed. They won't be allowed to sit on the carpet and the children will be at desks facing forward. They will only be allowed to the toilet in a bubble slot and they are banned from sharing food. They have to clean up their own cuts and scrapes but if they can't you will be called to collect your child and clean them up yourself at home. the school will report your child to the health authority if they shows signs of being unwell but will inform you of this. They are only allowed to walk home with the adult and not with their class friends. They want us there for 9 a.m. in the morning. they don't want us to be early and they don't want us to go near other parents as we queue down the street. they are encouraging kids to go through the gate by themselves and say goodbye to their parents at the gate. the teachers are allowed to help children with work but have to stay at least 1 metres away and can't help them for no more than 15 minutes. my daughter has not been at school for months and barely got into reception before lockdown. I'm well aware that the schools will be supporting the kids as well and trying to teach these new rules in a fun way but I feel like my daughter will mess up every day. She's used to holding hands with her friends and walking with her best friend to school. They all used to share snacks after school in the playground. they are used to sitting together and working together as a team. suddenly now they're not even going to be allowed to sit and do activities together. I know it might sound worse on paper but I just think for a 5-year old this experience of school is really negative. They won't be having assemblies or anything at the moment and they've said for the first two terms that theres no school meals. It just sounds really tough for a five-year-old. I hope the school make it fun and this doesn't put my daughter of going to school. It upsets me to think of her being told off for going near friends. they've also said that people can't pick your child up from a different bubble. that's going to make it hard for some parents as they used to share the school runs with friends last year. I'm presuming that my family can collect my child if there's ever a reason I can't go go but it just all seems very strict at the moment. I understand but it's confusing for them to suddenly not be allowed to do anything they used to. Not to mention having to walk in alone from the gates after a long break to a new class and teacher.

It looks like these plans are remaining until at least January. Kids will be full of anxiety being expected to be so mature so young.

As far as I am aware children have always been discouraged from sharing food at school due to potential allergies

I think so as well.

It’s a lot isn’t it? Hopefully if we all follow them things will get back to normal.

what do you want though

to them just not to bother-weve either got threads saying theyre throwing kids to the lions or ones that saying bubbles shouldnt be necessary

It sounds like your DD's school are taking the risks very seriously, which is a good thing. The whole thing of schools returning in a pandemic is enough to have us all on edge. I wish measures were as thorough in my son's school. I feel very anxious about him returning.

It is what it is. You aren't going to change things by worrying and fretting except from scaring your child. Don't talk about your fears anywhere near her, kids pick up everything. Instead be nonchalant about it all and she will be too.

I understand why you're concerned OP. I think KS1 Children shouldn't be expected to distance or only sit facing forward at desks etc - ESPECIALLY after six months off school. And they should have extra time outside / exercising.

I'm really concerned that at most schools they'll be playing in a tiny bit of roped off playground, then spending the rest of their day in the classroom having to sit still in their allocated space, no PE as they can't share the halls and no after school sports either. The more restless children will go nuts and become really disruptive as a result.

Y1 can also be a bit of shock after YR in normal times, so I would keep that in mind too.

Quite a few schools don't allow parents any further than the gate usually.

I know it sounds very different, but it probably looks much worse on paper than it will in the classroom. Your DD will get used to the new routine very quickly and will probably soon forget what some of the routines were when she was in YR. She will be learning new exciting things, she will still be able to interact with other children. They will come up with some new non-contact games that the children can play, so that will be exciting too. I am sure your DD will want to tell you how to play them.

Depending on the size of the classroom she will probably be sitting quite close to other children in her row. Very few schools have the space or the furniture to ensure children will be sitting 2m/1m apart.

It sounds very similar to the school I work in.
We had some year groups, including year 1, in for the last half term, operating under very restrictive circumstances, much as you describe.
I'm pleased to be able to tell you that the children we re all happy and got used to the new regime within the first few days. They found ways of inventing games so that They could play together without touching, and were fine eating their lunch in the classroom . Some of them missed playing with friends in other bubbles, but not to any great extent, they were just happy to have other children to play with. Every single one seemed cheerful and I was really impressed at how they took the new rules on board without any fuss.
So please don't worry. Schools are doing everything they can to make sure returning is a positive experience and that the children, especially the little ones, are happy and safe.

It's not going to retrain them in any negative way, unless an adult tells them it's negative.

Don't be that adult

This!

@Thripp

It's all bloody ridiculous.

I'm happy to be guided by the science which says SD for the indefinite future and more widespread mask wearing

Some people would stand on one leg for a month if the same bollocks science told them it would stop people from DYING. Where has critical thinking gone?

As if you know better than qualified scientists. Don't be so silly.

Some fool on the internet says the science is bollocks and we all go back to normal.

Right. Check your ego. It's got too big for its boots.

I don't want mask wearing in school. That will definitely be the point I remove her. I know you are not allowed to moan but they are sore, itchy, hot uncomfortable things for adults who wear them for hours. I know people disagree, but when little Jonny vomits into his mask that will be grim. Little kids unfortunately throw up with no warning. Plus they need to eat and drink and facial expressions are important!!! I can't think of anything worse than 5 year olds not seeing people's mouths all day.

I just think expecting 4-5 year olds to do the same as 11 year olds is a big ask. It will create mental health issues over the years in some kids. None of us have ever lived like our kids have. Some have not been anywhere since march. They are going to need alot of support to recover from things. Their brains are not used to the school day and being surrounded by people now. I'm sure they will make it fun for them but I just have my concerns. I'm not going to talk about it Infront of her. I was really positive about her going back because they were supposedly not doing SD within the class. I just hope this doesn't continue for another school year.

There will be no Nativity at Christmas. No harvest festival. No school trips or swimming. No meet and greet. I am sure I'm not allowed to comment on this either. But it's what school is about. On top of learning ofcourse.

I will never call this the new normal. It's temporary and it is not any sort of normal we want to get used to. It's restrictive and negative. It's caused huge job losses. People are struggling so badly at the moment. Suicide, depression and anxiety is really high now. There's people being left to get sick because hospital's won't see people. Gps won't see people. Education has been affected. We never want this to be a new normal! It will end and when it does I hope we can all be the people we were before.

Chucking up, doesn't happen that often in classrooms!

If there is any move to bring in masks for younger primary school age DC, then there will have had to have been weighty new evidence, because it's simply not on the cards at all.

I think you are beginning to fret about things that are in your imagination. Please do not let your anxiety transfer to your DC.

Until my child started in this situation I would think nothing, I would send my child to school then take it from there.

Sounds a bit too much for me personally but my child may be fine with it

I do wonder how much of children's anxiety is actually coming from the parents

I'm not at all. I've just got my eyes open! Which is important and I won't be called anxious for giving a hoot about my child going into an environment with quite strict new rules.

Nobody is allowed to be concerned on Mumsnet without the

"Go and see your GP"
"You will pass your anxiety onto your child"
"Get a grip"
" You are really overthinking this"
"You are way to invested in this"

Can it be possible for a parent to not be anxious wreck and just be looking at things from a other pov. I've got some concerns. You haven't. That's fine. I don't tell you that you seem detached to your child and like a bunch of sheep. So therefore respect my concerns without patronising me!

@seayork2020

I don't think parents are walking around the house telling the kids horror stories and stuff. Perhaps it's just talking to other adults in a forum and nothing more. My kids not reading Mumsnet so she doesn't even know about the email. I was just asking others what they felt. It doesn't mean my kids anxious, I've been 100% positive about school!

I can understand why you're worried but mine went back into reception in June last year with very similar rules and settled in really well. I think the kids were just excited to see each other.

I'm not trying to downplay your worries and a lot of what you say is a concern long term, merely reassure you that both of mine (who have very different characters and experience of school) loved being back. We have had lots of play dates over the summer hols with peers to maintain their friendships and reinforce lack of physical proximity doesn't affect their emotional closeness.

I understand your anxiety but if she is so little she will just accept what she is told and want to do what the other kids do now. Children are incredibly adaptable and she will after all be with teachers and friends she knows.

I'm not at all. I've just got my eyes open!

I have my eyes open too, thanks. What I see are two children who are happy to be back at school, who are not particularly concerned about the changes to the school environment and teachers who are working hard to make the school day a positive one for the kids.

I don’t see kids playing in a tiny roped off area of school, children tending to their own cuts or not talking to other kids.

I can't think of anything worse than 5 year olds not seeing people's mouths all day.

You’re in a pretty privileged position then, there are many many things much worse than a 5 year old not seeing people’s mouths.

I think realistically all the rules will not be stuck to because they sound a bit unrealistic. If I was a teacher and I saw two kids holding hands I doubt would do anything. 3 weeks in on a Friday when I'm exhausted I definitely would have stopped caring. I'm basing this on the fact that it looks like our nursery has already pied half the rules it sent us, probably within a few days. I think we all knew this was box ticking stuff. DD is already beautifully snotty so all back to normal.

My son is the same age and I’d be gutted if things were that strict. I really hope they easy off when they actually start xx

My friends in the US had their DC’s start the new term yesterday. In Colorado masks are compulsory in schools for the over 11’s. In Utah, it’s masks in school for everyone from kindergarten upwards with it being a misdemeanour if you fail to wear one. My friends DC’s didn’t have any problem with this, they were just excited to be back in school.

@Ziggyzaggy
Please teach your child to not share her wotsits with my child or any other child kn the playground!
You are worried about your child having a normal school experience, I've spent years worrying that children like yours will inadvertently give my child something that may kill her!
Food should never be shared in schools!

I don't want mask wearing in school.

If I wear a mask in school is not up to parents to decide.
That's down to the Government and my school leaders, and may well be based on specific individual reasons and needs.

If masks in the busy points in a school help keep schools open that yes, I welcome them. If masks in the busy points in a school help keep staff and pupils well then again, I welcome them.

Unfortunately schools don't just have young children who may be less likely to become ill if they catch Covid. We have to consider the whole school community but individuals.

So far now, even though I am clinically vulnerable - as are a couple of other members of staff and as are a handful of our children - we won't wear masks. However, if things change - like in Scotland for secondary - I will.

As a member of staff I am actually allowed to wear a mask if I choose. It's in our risk assessment for school staff - English state primary, and approved by the LEA. I've had a couple of nice cheery ones printed with the school colours and logo, and my name. For now I'll use them for when travelling or going to the local shops for school. That may change once we are back.

Obviously you are welcome to remove your child from the education system any time you wish. But it would make way pretty sense o actually wait until your child is there and see how it goes. For most young children, they'll actually adapt exceptionally well and quickly. What seems strange to parents most likely won't bother the children. That was certainly our experience of having many children in our childcare bubbles last summer - and ther had way way more changes in place, even not being in their own classrooms, with different staff and different children, smaller bubbles, desks all SDed, no bubbles nixing, etc . Every one of those 4-7 year olds adapted and many actually preferred the less busy rooms with the more rigid routines.

Little kids unfortunately throw up with no warning

Only two or three times in my 20+ years of teaching have I had a child do this with no warning. Usually if a child is ill we know it's likely and can prepare. But it's really not that regular.

Even if it doesn't happen it's quite manageable generally - and we can quickly clear the area, have maintenance staff to clean quickly, etc. A mask would have little to no impact on it really as they are so quick to remover - a flick of the ear elastic and most can come off within a second or two.

Please try hard not to project your worries on your child before they've even started. You may well be surprised - as already said, many children are really adaptable and many may even prefer some of the changes. The carpet for instance - many children don't like being sat cross legged cramped together in the hard itchy carpet anyway and the class love it when you let them sit in chairs instead. That's just one example.

"Can it be possible for a parent to not be anxious wreck and just be looking at things from a other pov. I've got some concerns. You haven't. That's fine. I don't tell you that you seem detached to your child and like a bunch of sheep. So therefore respect my concerns without patronising me!"

@Ziggyzaggy did you post another thread yesterday about your mental health and feeling anxious generally as a result of lockdown? You seem to have scrolled past posts from school staff and those that try to reassure you.

Those rules may well seem overwhelming but teachers will adapt them to the particular circumstances and age of the child. Nobody wants to teach unhappy children.