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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to leave 2 week old DD in her cot whilst I shower?

118 replies

Boomclaps · 22/08/2020 07:50

Right, so I realise my anxiety is through the ducking roof. I’ve been referred to MH for this and I am getting help. But DP went back to work a couple of days ago, with 6am starts and I haven’t had a shower since then.
Can I leave DD in her cot (she’s sleeping after morning BF),in our bedroom for a few mins whilst I stop myself smelling like stale breast milk and cleanse my stitches?

OP posts:
audweb · 22/08/2020 07:51

Yes of course you can. Take the baby monitor if you want more reassurance but it will be fine.

NoWordForFluffy · 22/08/2020 07:51

Yes! Do it. She'll be fine. Flowers

Pipandmum · 22/08/2020 07:51

Of course. How else are you supposed to do anything?

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 22/08/2020 07:51

Yes of course. I wouldn't do a long hair wash/leg shave face cream job but a quick all over wash would be enough to freshen you up and feel good.

Then on an evening hand baby over to her dad and take yourself off for a soak.

SuperCaliFragalistic · 22/08/2020 07:51

Yes yes yes. Please look after yourself too. If she wakes she will be fine and perfectly safe for a minute or 2 while you dry off.

YesINameChangeEveryDay · 22/08/2020 07:52

Of course you can op. Being a new mum can be a really anxious time but this really is totally fine.
Have a really good shower, wash your hair, take care of your stitches, don't rush it.

Thanks
RoadTripsOceanDips · 22/08/2020 07:52

Yes, absolutely. It’s so important to take care of yourself too Flowers

Cornishmendoitdrekkly · 22/08/2020 07:53

Yes. She is in a safe space. Have a shower and look after yourself Flowers

Whatafustercluck · 22/08/2020 07:53

Of course yanbu. I would only say yabu if you were leaving her crying there. When they're sleeping or happy kicking around in their cot is a perfect time for a shower and you'll feel so much better for it.

Congratulations op, and take care of yourself. Flowers

BimbleBamble · 22/08/2020 07:53

Firstly, congratulations! Secondly, of course you can, but I know how terrifying it is at first, leave the door open, keep popping in and out till the water is at temp and then go for it, or if that still seems like too much, if you have Moses basket, but it on bathroom floor, or just baby on a blanket. I did that a few times.

AngeloMysterioso · 22/08/2020 07:53

Go for it. If she is anything like my DS was at that age she’ll be asleep for hours!

FippertyGibbett · 22/08/2020 07:53

Yes.
When mine were older I’d put them in the bouncy chair, in the bathroom doorway, and have a shower. So that I could see them , but so they weren’t affected by the steam.

Confusedcorona · 22/08/2020 07:53

Yes absolutely! There isn't really an alternative anyway?

I used to leave the door open, just incase.

You will probably jump out the shower a few times when you hear phantom cries though Grin

Chocolateandcarbs · 22/08/2020 07:53

Of course you can. Enjoy your shower and I hope your anxiety reduces soon.

BakewellGin1 · 22/08/2020 07:55

Enjoy your shower. She will be fine xx

DancingCatGif · 22/08/2020 07:55

it's fine. Even if she's crying for a few minutes, it's fine. What if you had other children? You'd have to leave her sometimes, right?

I understand, I went through this myself. It's so hard.

Bereft2020 · 22/08/2020 07:56

I feel your pain with this. It gave me the fear. I used to put her in a Moses basket and leave her at the bathroom door.

Bouncy chair?

HelloDulling · 22/08/2020 07:56

Yes, you can. Enjoy the hot hot water, get your hair really clean, then put clean clothes on. And if she’s still asleep, pop downstairs and make a cup of tea to take back to bed.

You will feel so much better for it.

Scrap2020 · 22/08/2020 07:57

Yes.

If you really want peace of mind, you can get portable baby monitor camera's, so you could actually watch her.

But you don't need to. It will be a few mins.

You will probably hoover & take bins out when you can in the future, so its all the same.

Flowers
Covert19 · 22/08/2020 07:57

Yes, in fact you must. Your baby needs you to be clean and healthy.

You don’t need to watch over the baby 24/7. As long as she is in a safe place - the cot is very safe - you can leave her to attend to your own needs. Even if she wakes and cries it won’t be for long. She’ll be fine.

Sunshineandmoonlight · 22/08/2020 07:58

You can, I have. I don’t anymore though as I can’t trust my other children not to try and “help” if the baby cries.

Also all of mine have vomited milk and choked on it early with reflux. I just bring them in and transfer to a play mat.

mynameiscalypso · 22/08/2020 07:58

Absolutely - my midwife told me to do exactly this. You will feel a million times better after a shower and absolutely nothing will happen to DD while she's safely snoring in her cot.

Nixen · 22/08/2020 07:58

You can, and you should.
However when your DP gets home from work he should be handed the wee one for a cuddle while you go and have a shower / bath. I bet he’s showering every day...

Mywifeandkids1 · 22/08/2020 07:59

That’s fine but I’d personally put baby in a bouncer or Moses basket in the bathroom with me 😊

Cheeseycheeseycheesecheese · 22/08/2020 07:59

Absolutely you can!! It was either his cot, or when he was stuffed up in a chair on the bathroom floor.

Congratulations and well done on acknowledging your anxieties

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