My MIL keeps asking if we have had sex 🤢

[Tink2007]

Literally as in the title. I’m due our baby soon and she has asked three times in the last week if husband (her son) and I have had sex yet.

Now personally it creeps me out being asked that and makes sex the last thing I want to do and husband has told her it’s weird her asking to which she just laughed and said “you’re my son”. She has asked again today and it is just weirding me out.

She never asked with any of our other children 🤢

[DanceItOut]

I see your creepy MIL and raise you a nosey gross grandma! My Nan used to ask me the same thing! “Has he given it a good go?” She would ask. “What gets the baby in gets the baby out.” It was very awkward.

[suzy13woozy32]

I was my husband's second wife, and, after we were married, we were invited to a dinner party at his sister's house.
She lived abroad and there were about a dozen guests, none of which we had ever met before. She asked me, in a loud voice,
whether I was a virgin when I married her brother!!!
My husband promptly said, no she wasn't, but I was!!!!
Sister-in-law looked suitably abashed.

Tell your mother-in-law you are still a virgin!!!!

[FelicisNox]

YANBU.

Ignore her.

Don't answer your landline and use your mobile to screen your calls, literally block her out.

[Gilld69]

shes probably asking as sperm is known to help with the softening of the cervix during the final stages of pregnancy so it most prob not jyst her looking for an insight into your sex life so dont take too much offence but if it makes you feel uncomfortable let her know

[user1490954378]

Laugh and say f**k off, but then tell her that you've heard she has been at it with all the neighbours, and ask her who was the best at it.

[fayebelle]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[DreamTheMoors]

“Now that we’re on the subject, Grace, when was the last time Phil really gave you a really good shag?“
—or—
“I think you need to get laid, Grace. Either that, or you need a very long, very thick, vibrating dildo.”

[BigChocFrenzy]

Bloody hell she has no filter
Maybe the shock of the question is intended to bring on labour

[ShitStain]

Your mil is a great contraceptive. It would put me off having any more kids.

[TroysMammy]

Just say "the last time we had sex this happened. I'm going to have a curry instead".

[mugginsalert]

Its obviously inappropriate. Having said that both my mum and MIL lost any sense of boundaries leading up to the birth of my kids and for a few months after. Then it faded away and they reverted back to normal. Now we all pretend it never happened.

[jillybeanclevertips]

OMG ask her why she wants to know, and does she think it's OK to ask that. Tell her you own mother would never ask that kind of thing. (Or tell he NO, Your son is gay.

[DonnaLee8]

I didn't get on particularly well with my MIL for a good few years - including the years I was pregnant, but if she'd asked me that I think I'd have just laughed. 🤷🏼‍♀️

[MumW]

I'd be telling her it's none of her business and if she doesn't keep her sticky beak to herself, she might find herself out of your lives completely.

[BigChocFrenzy]

Next step:
She'll be demanding to witness you having sex

[U2HasTheEdge]

@DonnaLee8

I didn't get on particularly well with my MIL for a good few years - including the years I was pregnant, but if she'd asked me that I think I'd have just laughed. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Same here.

If she was randomly asking when we last had sex I would be concerned.

But during a conversation, presumably where you were discussing the impending birth and you were talking about wanting labour to come on (?) I would probably laugh.

[GlummyMcGlummerson]

Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew

[WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll]

shes probably asking as sperm is known to help with the softening of the cervix during the final stages of pregnancy so it most prob not jyst her looking for an insight into your sex life so dont take too much offence but if it makes you feel uncomfortable let her know

I'm sure that's the case, but there's no getting away from the fact that the two are intrinsically linked and she's talking about her son's sex life. She's not a relative-stranger HCP with whom you could easily pinpoint their reason for asking as being from a purely medical pov only.

There's also the fact that piv sex is indeed widely known/believed to speed up labour, so it's extremely patronising that she keeps on asking it, as if there's no way that another woman who has had nine months to learn, focus and get used to the idea of giving birth (not to mention the fact that it isn't her first or even second baby) couldn't possibly have heard about it as well.

Next step:
She'll be demanding to witness you having sex
Isnn't there some country/culture/religion where it's actually the law that a family elder - PIL or similar - is required to be there on the wedding night to witness that 'the act' has successfully taken place? (not envy).

It always used to be the law/custom in the UK that the Home Secretary had to be present at the birth of a royal baby, to ensure that all was above board and the legitimacy of the baby (not quite sure how they managed that part by that stage back then!) - it certainly happened at the birth of the current Queen, although she might well have been the last one.

[winniestone37]

She obviously thinks it will bring on labour, yes it’s horribly awkward and I’d hate it. The outrage and shock on here is much much worse though ‘do you think she has dementia?’ - the individual who asked this question needs a telling off. The rest of you need to get a grip.

[spikeymama]

Haaa haaa! This made me laugh so much. Cheered me right up

[Newmommabear]

Same for me. I guess it's a matter of how you were brought up. Sex was an open topic in our household. I apeak to my MIL, gran and mom about it freely.

[IdblowJonSnow]

Yuck. Nosey!
Or does she think she's being funny?
Let your DH deal with her craziness.

[ilovemygirls]

I think most of my friends (and a lot of my family) mentioned having sex towards the end of pregnancy to kick start it. Some of the comments are a little unfair, in her own way she’s trying to help... she wants to meet her grandchild. Asking once in a jokey way would be enough though! Don’t worry about it... if it feels weird, just tell her that. “MIL, discussing this/you mentioning us having sex makes me feel incredibly weird, please don’t do it again. Instead, please can you make me a cup of tea”!

[Lynnm63]

@Tink2007

Literally as in the title. I’m due our baby soon and she has asked three times in the last week if husband (her son) and I have had sex yet.

Now personally it creeps me out being asked that and makes sex the last thing I want to do and husband has told her it’s weird her asking to which she just laughed and said “you’re my son”. She has asked again today and it is just weirding me out.

She never asked with any of our other children 🤢

Could you say well yes I have had sex but not with DH. Obviously you’d need to let your DH know in advance. I remember when pregnant some idiot was asking me about conception so I said DH was at work and I was in Sainsbury’s.
He nearly chocked he never asked about my sex life again. I may not have mentioned we had ivf so technically neither of us were present at conception 😉

[WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll]

Some of the comments are a little unfair, in her own way she’s trying to help... she wants to meet her grandchild.

It's not going to be months or years, though. Unless the actual pregnant mum is desperate for the baby to be born ASAP and/or there are medical concerns necessitating a sooner birth (in which case, HCPs will induce you medically rather than ordering your DH in to the ward to enable non-stop sex), whatever is the problem in just letting nature take its course and waiting another couple of weeks or so?

It's not really helping at all by badgering your DS and DIL to do something (very personal) that is already commonly known/believed to speed up labour. I presume she wouldn't be constantly on at them about eating lots of bran, veg and curry to keep their bowels ticking over efficiently, even when nobody has ever mentioned any concerns in that area.