To think the comment was completely unnecessary and frankly nasty?

[CrooksAndNannies]

A friend's DD has just graduated.

She put a proud mom FB post up with details of this and encouragement for fantastic new grad role.

The FB post received over 100 positive responses.

Her DSIL put, and I quote "Congrats DNeice. Now. Welcome to the real world of commerce, in house politics, back stabbing and two faced 'friends'. I'd just stay on for another degree. 👏👏"

This was a couple of weeks ago, and friend is still rightly fuming, and feels it will affect all future interactions with her DSIL.

AIBU to think this reflects badly on the author?

I’d have responded to the unpleasant post with
“Sorry you’re so disenchanted ...I suppose things change over many years...are there any options for early retirement?”

Nothing I ever posted on FBk would get > 100 positive responses. Can anyone else ever say that happened to them? I think I've got up to 15 likes or so max...

DD achieved a big thing recently but I've not put it on FBk. Oh dear, I may be failing at the "proud mum" league table.

Local Govt? yeah, she's right

It was probably badly judged but it was a joke. Your friend needs to get over herself.

You and your friend are weird to be so annoyed by it.

She could have must deleted the DSIL’s comment if she was so offended.

Well, it is true!

I would certainly take it as a joke. It's a bit strange to still be fuming over it or to have taken it so personally in the first place.

Do you always fume together?

😂

Just a tongue in cheek comment and attempt at humour. I wouldn’t be offended by it.

Sounds like a joke to me, I don't see the big deal.

The fact your friend is still fuming over a somewhat true joke 2 weeks later is comical enough, the fact that you have then decided to join in the faux outrage by posting this thread is reason 32,1982382 why the internet was a mistake.

@IWantT0BreakFree

Do you always fume together?

😂

I was about to post that exact emoji to that exact comment but seen that you had beaten me to it.

Too funny!

I hate those sort of comments, people who always look to the negative, but I don't think I would be fuming about it. Probably just an eye roll and forget about it.

It's a funny joke. Based on university being the best years of your life. It reflects that she knows she's bright enough to stay on and bright enough that passing her degree was never in doubt. I'd honestly say it was nice! Did your friend not go to uni herself? Is it a cultural misunderstanding? I'm not really understanding what the perceived slight is?

this is something my DSis does ALL the time. Makes things about her and/or hides a dig behind a compliment. As a result we are no longer FB friends.

It's a funny sarcastic comment. Nothing to be enraged about

@britINscotland

this is something my DSis does ALL the time. Makes things about her and/or hides a dig behind a compliment. As a result we are no longer FB friends.

But it's neither a comment about the DSIL nor a dig behind a compliment. There is no 'dig' in implying that University is a far better place to be than the world of work. The comment isn't saying 'oh, look at you, posh girl, graduating, you aren't going to know what hit you once you get into the real world where the normal people, like me, have to work hard', is it?

But I think that may be what is being TAKEN as being implied. Otherwise I have literally no idea where the problem is seen as being.

Either:

• It was a joke
• SIL had had a horrendous week at work and felt like she should share what her niece was letting herself in for

Either way, yes it wasn’t in the best taste but certainly not worth fuming over for weeks or letting it ruin a family relationship.

She's absolutely spot on- welcome to the world of work! You and your friend need a reality check if you're offended by that.

But the world of work IS pretty shit.

And for FWIW, I've been back to university three times (albeit to specialise further in my field) and have loved being a student. I love my job but being a student is the best. You and your friend need to get a life if you're offended so easily.

...I've been back to university three times since first graduating...

When I bought my first house my aunt sent me a card which had 'welcome to the ranks of the capitalists- use this (enclosed £20) to buy something totally frivolous' written in it
At first I was a bit but soon realised it was a joke and used the cash to buy some lovely toiletries. Same SOH as your friends sis? She is overthinking

@FluffyKittensinabasket

But the world of work IS pretty shit.

Is it though? I've worked in a couple of miserable snakepits but most places have been fine, people just normal people like anywhere else. I like most of my colleagues. If the SIL's experience of work is that everyone is backstabbing and two-faced everywhere she goes then gosh, she's had some terribly bad luck.