To think anyone TTC now is mad?

[absolutelybloodyanonymous]

Given the GDP fall-economy disaster, rising unemployment, coronavirus, does it seem bloody mad to be TTC now?

I’ve got mates and family who are TTC or already upduffed and it seems absolutely mad to me. Why does RIGHT NOW feel like a good time to TTC? AIBU?

(Nc for this!)

@PumpkinsandAutumnLeaves VERY well said. OP you are an utter joke.

OP you sound very over anxious. Sure stuff is bad, but it’s never great, you’ll always be bringing children into a difficult world! Maybe have some counselling.

Bet you've done F All on Furlough

@Apricotta did you not read my post correctly? Do you think everyone has made those calculations since the world exists of a few more people than just you & your circle (shocking, I know).

The fertility rate is already declining & all those things you mention are already going to happen & yet we haven't got to grips with an ageing population. Younger generations today already face greater hardship than older ones (general pattern not just your dc) so it's not unreasonable to ponder.

@Apricotta oh so you're a furlough basher, nice!

YABU. Proud conceiver of a coronial (our second)

It might be a crazy time for you to get pregnant OP but for many of us who have stable jobs that are not impacted by covid, own our own homes without a mortgage and have childcare arrangements covered it’s actually a great time.

And you may think these posts are goady but equally those of us who have been trying to conceive or have successfully conceived may not appreciate being called mad because of their perfectly valid choices.

@saywhatnowerm

Can I ask what all these secure jobs are that are completely recession & pandemic proof? No worries about future tax hikes either?

My husband works in commercial contract law and so is largely unaffected - there will be contract disputes in a recession and there will be new business contracts in a boom. He offered to reduce his salary part way through lockdown and his workplace actually declined.

I work in HR for a large global / stable corporation and even if things go pear shaped, being in HR means we would conduct redundancies ie I'd be one of the last out the door and locking the door! If I lost my job I also think there are always HR jobs (even if only to do unpleasant things like restructures).

We have both worked from home throughout and can continue to.

We also have a fixed rate mortgage for 4 more years and healthy savings. We don't take for granted how privileged this is.

This whole thing just made me realise that life is too short, I've been putting it off for too log for a career that doesn't make me happy and a bunch of other reasons that seem silly with all this giving me perspective. I'm pregnant now, early days but I'm excited about my future. I can't predict what the economy or the world will be like in 18 years, no matter what it's going to be a gamble. Plenty of women have been pregnant and given birth throughout lockdown with no scientific evidence to say we are at risk enough to need to shield (I'm being careful anyway but I don't see the issue)

for many of us who have stable jobs that are not impacted by covid, own our own homes without a mortgage and have childcare arrangements covered it’s actually a great time.

Eh, who is the many that are childbearing age who not only have a home & have it paid off? The average age to be a FTB is 32 is it not? Are you saying people who are not in that (rare privileged) position shouldn't be TTC in the present climate?

Isn’t it strange that MN deletes links to previous posts? Anyone who wants to read past posts from a specific user can just do a search.

Maybe don’t write things that you don’t want other people to read!

🤷🏻‍♀️

Doesn't make any difference really. The children already here are doing ok. You have to make the best of life. It is worrying. But it will sort itself out. Or things may be tougher for all of us. But we will find happiness again.

I don't blame people for wanting to still have children and have a normal life.

My partner said there are going to be food shortages. I've noticed Asda can't get hold of ham locally to me and frozen chips and sweetcorn are unavailable. So who knows. Life is abit uncertain now. But I hope in a year we will be seeing the other side. Although I appreciate it's caused huge job losses and things. Perhaps the answer is to only have children now if you can manage. It would be a bad idea if you are broke and struggling....

Well I had my ds just after 9/11 but I think things are much worse now.

And I know people always say "but they still had kids during the war" - yes they did because they didn't have contraception. We do. I do think prospective parents should really consider whether they want to bring kids into a world of climate change etc which is why I don't agree with for many of us who have stable jobs that are not affected by covid, own our own homes without a mortgage and have childcare arrangements covered it’s actually a great time Being financially secure is nowhere near enough to protect you from climate change. The changes in the Arctic are terrifying and today's babies will be 10 in a decade. I don't want to think what things are going to be like by then.

@FluffyKittensinabasket

Isn’t it strange that MN deletes links to previous posts? Anyone who wants to read past posts from a specific user can just do a search.

Maybe don’t write things that you don’t want other people to read!

🤷🏻‍♀️

Maybe mumsnet should be spendIng their time banning users who repeatedly go onto the conception boards to tell vulnerable women that they are selfish and too old to be thinking about trying for a family.

Googybob- not at all I think anyone who wants to ttc in the current climate should do so without judgement. I am using myself as an example to answer the OPs comment I didn’t claim it was the vast majority of the population.

@Shefliesonherownwings

I am currently pregnant, DH and I began trying in January and we would have continued to try still if it hadn't already happened.

This is probably taking the thread to a darker place but we lost our daughter to stillbirth last year and basically getting pregnant again was all I could think about. We're also getting on a bit now so regardless of the economy and pandemic it isn't 'bloody mad' to us and we'd have kept going regardless. There's plenty of reasons why people want to be pregnant or trying now, don't be so judgemental.

🌷Don't let rude, inconsiderate & frankly stupid people get to you

It's fairly bloody obvious why many would still or start TTC OR be pleased to be pregnant - even with all
Of this going on. It's less than ideal for most, but as we all know (xx) life is far from ideal & we just have to make the best of it!!!

Best of luck to anyone already pregnant or TTC

@cologne4711

Well I had my ds just after 9/11 but I think things are much worse now.

And I know people always say "but they still had kids during the war" - yes they did because they didn't have contraception. We do. I do think prospective parents should really consider whether they want to bring kids into a world of climate change etc which is why I don't agree with for many of us who have stable jobs that are not affected by covid, own our own homes without a mortgage and have childcare arrangements covered it’s actually a great time Being financially secure is nowhere near enough to protect you from climate change. The changes in the Arctic are terrifying and today's babies will be 10 in a decade. I don't want to think what things are going to be like by then.

All very easy to say when you already have kids.

@absolutelybloodyanonymous

Given the GDP fall-economy disaster, rising unemployment, coronavirus, does it seem bloody mad to be TTC now?

I’ve got mates and family who are TTC or already upduffed and it seems absolutely mad to me. Why does RIGHT NOW feel like a good time to TTC? AIBU?

(Nc for this!)

See how many People you've already upset with your cowardly name changing nasty post!

Jesus
Why, just why?

I am 33 will be 34 in a month. This is the longest stretch I have been on regular contraception. I do not know how long it will take me to get pregnant. We are not trying yet as I will be administering flu jabs in the next few months so do not want to be in such close contact with people whilst in the early stages of pregnancy. Instead we aim to try in January.

My take on it is that there is never a perfect time, dh and I have stable jobs, we have our own house and a girl and a boy already so dont need to buy clothes and have all the big purchases already. I am not getting any younger and whilst 34 is not considered old to try to conceive nowadays I would rather be done and dusted with having babies well before 40. Also my other two children were born when I was 29 years old and 30 respectively so I do not want a big age gap with my last one( probably will be about 4.5years with my son though depending on how long it takes). Everyone measures and assesses risk differently. Yabu to male blanket statements, lots of people will have different circumstances to you!

@bee222

I totally agree! I wish MN could take a stronger stance on people who go out of their way to take out their frustrations on mothers in this way. It is glaringly obvious that posters who do this, have zero concern for parents and probably minimal genuine concern for the planet. It is just another bully, picking on a vulnerable group, probably with a very sad existence and low self worth, making themselves feel better. You can almost hear her salivating when she sees another thread where she gets to say "mothers are selfish and I'm childfree by choice". It is pathetic.

*make not male

At 39 if you didn’t have a baby already are you seriously saying you would have stopped all fertility treatment and essentially accepted that you may never have children due to Covid?

Despite your journey you are now in a comfortable place of having successfully had a child. I haven’t and am 3 years into failed ivf and other disasters so YADBU to judge me for continuing to try get pregnant from your cosy spot with your baby.