To call it a vulva?

[elephantsinlove]

Baby DD is not yet at the stage where she calls it anything, but the time is approaching and she will soon start learning words etc, I have been wondering what to teach her to call it - I know that vulva is the correct term.

Then again, a lot of people use bits/front bottom/fanny/foof/lala/ various other cutesy or vaguely teletubby sounding names

What is it called in your house?

Is she going to be the weird kid if I teach her it's her vulva? I tend to (technically incorrectly I know) use vagina myself, or various comedy words in general chat as vulva seems a bit odd but perhaps something I just need to get over!

I understand using the correct terms can help to report abuse, but how does it help prevent abuse.
We say Vagina and penis.
Well used to they’re all adults now.

@Bananabread8 well yes actually my 4 year old does have some age appropriate concept of how babies are made in as much as mummy has an egg and daddy has a 'seed' and sometimes when they come together they can make a baby, she also knows that her and her sister grew in my womb which is why my belly got big and she came out of my vagina but her little sister was 'cut out of me' because I was poorly. A clitoris is not a dirty word, alot of children explore there bodies at a very young age out of sheer curiosity, it my daughter asked me what something was I would give her the name for it.

I wondered about this with my kids(oldest one is 26). Coming from a family when mine never had a name, i was keen to normalise anatomy. I kind of buckled though, and though vulva would be Volvo, so stuck with vagina(not very correct i know) but used as va"gina"

@Tlollj it can help the abuse be identified earlier which in turn prevents further abuse, it could also potentially put a predator off if they know a child has the knowledge to tell on them.

My 5yo ds uses the word penis. 7yo ds prefers to say willy. Dd will be told vagina/vulva/fanny interchangeably I expect.

Vulva, loads of great reasons to call it this. Call it it’s proper name help your daughter to be more confident and understand her body.

@Shmithecat2

My DD (just turned 2) calls it a vulva.

Weirdest stealth boast ever 😂

In what way is it a stealth boast? It's a five letter, two syllable word. No harder to say than most of the cutesy variations.

@Feralkidsatthecampsite

I am 49 and would love to learn what a clitorious is..

I think given most modern men can't find it likely became extinct around the same time of the penisauras

[quote ivfdreaming]@Boshmama

Because I generally find people who insist on their children using the correct anatomical names also tend to be the people who perpetuate a sense of superiority over the rest of us for using slang words

@FourPlasticRings

No but my point is we all know what the correct term is but rarely use it. Doesn't mean either DH or I are embarrassed to use the "correct" names.
However I may try "Minnie" with DH and see what his reaction is 🤣🤣[/quote]
@ivfdreaming

I think it's really sad that you'd judge another woman for using the correct terms for her (or her child's) body.

I literally have no idea why anyone would call them something that they aren't.

Very weird to link what your toddler calls their genitals to what you call them in bed

Vulva & vagina are the Latin medical terms. Which is why they sound unnatural to many of us when spouted from the mouths of very young children. Do you teach them patella, or knee? Scapula or shoulder?

What is the alternative for vulva then that is the equivalent of saying 'knee' rather than 'patella'?

I've had more contact than I would ever like with sexual abuse cases in my previous work. Both my ds use the word penis for good reason, it's been proven about anatomically correct terms both reducing the time DC are believed when disclosing abuse and the reduction of trauma during the legal process because there is less debate over the terms.

I would rather if it ever came to it save them a moment of fear or stress than give a flying fig about silly other mothers who have decided I am pretentious for teaching them that. The only idiots who think that are in a nice little ivory tower where their only self esteem boost is scoffing at others. Its actually a good idea to teach them the anatomical al names. Plus to be honest I do personally think a grown ass adult twittering about her "minnie" is ridiculous, but not my monkeys so not my business.

Have all boys here but expecting a girl, think we'll refer to it as her front bottom and back bottom... Then when she is around the age of starting school will tell her it's called a vagina or vulva but we just prefer to use front bottom or back bottom, bit like how the boys know they have a penis but we call it a willy..

Still makes me giggle when I hear the term 'fanny' no matter what, I cannot get over that name for it, just makes me lol everytime. My best friend as a child, lived with just her Mum and sister and always refers to it as Fanny and when I sit there giggling she says its what they've always called it, and see it as the same type of slang name like Willy. Still sat here giggling over it now, no idea why!!!

Even when you go for an examination the medical staff that I have seen have never really said vulva Or the nurses when having a smear. So I’m not sure it will give you all this confidence what ever you choose to refer to your private parts.

@Bananabread8

Even when you go for an examination the medical staff that I have seen have never really said vulva Or the nurses when having a smear. So I’m not sure it will give you all this confidence what ever you choose to refer to your private parts.

Absolutely-I have had three pregnancies and births, countless smears and several gynaecological procedures and no medical professional has ever said the word vulva to me. I have never said the word vulva in reference to my own body.

My 5 year old knows all the medical terms but calls it her moo moo.

Knowing the correct terminology can be an effective guard against sex offenders, who often get off on children using 'cutesy' terms.

There's absolutely no reason not to teach her the appropriate terms, it might well protect her in the future.

My ds asked me what mine was called and I said vulva so he calls it that.
I'm pregnant just now and he asked how the baby came out and I told him it would come out of my vagina which is inside my vulva.

Sounds like such a positive adjective.

What a clitorious day!
This meal is utterly clitorious!

I am absolutely stunned that so many women have such an issue with female body parts being referred to by their actual names.

People do not behave this way about boys using the word penis.

We call it a minnie

But dd(7) does know the proper word

We also say willie/winkie for ds...but they both call it a peanut

Age appropriation for a start. Do you want to tell your children how babies are made and how labour works too.
We are obviously in MN land here.

Yes there are absolutely age appropriate ways to discuss these things with pre-schoolers. My 4 year old has a basic grasp on it. One of the important skills that a parent needs to develop is to tackle issues like this in an age appropriate way, and to put aside their own hang-ups in order not to pass them on to their children.

Using the term... at 7 though come on!!

What's wrong with the word "clitoris"? Genuine question. It's just a word and it's the correct name for one of their body parts. Why would you avoid telling a 7 year old the name for one of their body parts? You are attaching themes that don't need to be attached. Do you think people are handing out copies of the karma sutra to their primary aged daughters?? If your 7 year old asks or it comes up in conversation, of course it's perfectly appropriate to give them correct information about their own bodies. Your attitude is one of the reasons why we have girls who are ashamed of their bodies and their sexuality.

DS knows mummy does her wee’s out of my vulva, it’s the word for the area so I see no harm in using it.
As an aside when doing a smear test I’m not overly interested in the woman’s vulva, much more her vagina, which can get in the way of me finding her cervix.

@IWantT0BreakFree it’s nothing to do with my attitude. It’s my personal preference when my child gets a bit older I will explain.

Don’t speak nonsense being ashamed of your body has nothing to do with what ever word you call it weather its flower or what ever. Ashamed of their sexuality? I think that’s a wild statement to be making and assuming based on that I have a different view to you on on this particular subject.