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Original poster

WWYD Sisters wedding

140 replies

Monkeymilkshake · 30/07/2020 12:45

Hello,
Asking for some advice as i am torn between 2 options.
My sister is getting married in France in a couple of weeks. We dont know if we should go or not. I really really want to be there for my sister and see her get married but...
We would need to cross the country as the wedding is taking place in south of France (think 9hr + by car, no airport nearby).
We would be travelling with 2 DC (under 4yo).
Restrictions means we would have to wear masks for ceremony but not for reception. There will be around 200 guests at the wedding. Being in a close room with so many people panicks me.
I should also say, we are all fit and healthy (no one shielding etc).

What would you do?
Yabu: it's your sisters wedding. Go go go
Yanbu: there is a pandemic dontcha know. Stay at home.

OP posts:
Floralnomad · 30/07/2020 14:52

I wouldn’t go , particularly wouldn’t take a baby , by 2 weeks time You may find France is back on the quarantine list as well .

MyHeartIsInCornwall · 30/07/2020 14:59

My cousin was due to get married on the 7th August in France and it was cancelled about 4 weeks ago because that’s the right thing to do. We had our ferry crossings refunded because they’re reducing passenger numbers and can not supply cabins that we had booked as they are off limits. I can’t even believe the wedding is going ahead tbh. A gathering that large is a big no-no!

user1487194234 · 30/07/2020 15:02

Personally O would never miss my sister’s wedding
But if you are uncomfortable you should do what you think best

tara66 · 30/07/2020 15:02

200 guests? Is that allowed in France?

LioneIRichTea · 30/07/2020 15:04

You have to wear masks for the ceremony but not the reception? Also, 200 guests? Surprised that’s allowed. A friend is getting married over her in September and is just having 30 guests all family. Guess rules are different over there....

MouseMartin · 30/07/2020 15:14

@Durgasarrow

There's a fucking pandemic. What is wrong with your sister.
It’s only a wedding. Seems like a perfect excuse to avoid it.
uniglowooljumper · 30/07/2020 15:15

I'd go on my own.

Yeahnahmum · 30/07/2020 15:27

Your sis is bu for not having cancelled her wedding.
Surely most people will end up not going
Just be highest with her and call her. Says you want to but don't feel comfortable. Or use your Lo as a (valid) excuse.

QuestionMarkNow · 30/07/2020 15:27

You are taking much less risk being in France than doing the same thing in the uk (despite the claims it’s awful and they have a second wave, the number of cases and deaths are still lower than the U.K...)
And unlike the U.K. where Covid was/is everywhere, France was different. Some areas, esp towards the south had hardly any cases at all even at the high of the pandemic...

You can still have a coffee in the way (as a take away for example or sitting in an outside table - plenty of those around).

QuestionMarkNow · 30/07/2020 15:28

FWIW what would make me think is the travel itself, regardless of the pandemic!!

ssd · 30/07/2020 15:32

Op is breastfeeding she can't go alone

Charleyhorses · 30/07/2020 15:34

I think I'd decline on the basis that quarantine rules can change and catch up for a UK celebration next time she is here (I think our 2021 calendar is going to be full of this!)

FindingNeverland1 · 30/07/2020 15:41

I really would NOT want to go. The journey with kids is likely to be dreadful. So that alone, YANBU.

However I'd probably give in to the social pressure of going as your absence will be noted and judged harshly, probably.

Unfortunate situation.

Jaxhog · 30/07/2020 15:46

I'm gobsmacked that she's even allowed to do this. I thought France had rules about the number of people who can meet too. Is that not the case? Either way, it seems like madness at the moment.

SantaClaritaDiet · 30/07/2020 15:47

You are taking much less risk being in France than doing the same thing in the uk

so true, but that's what would slightly worry me: last minute cancellation because France decides to close the borders to non-essential travels again, instead of accepting tourists like us brits coming from countries much more at risk.

Original poster
Monkeymilkshake · 30/07/2020 15:51

I am under quite alot of pressure to go from my parents. They also want me to bring the kids so they can play with them. Which i can understand. But i also know that they wont respect social distancing etc...
I mean i know its first world problems and all that but i am finding it quite stressful. Everything everybody has said, i have thought it. Of course go, no dont go. Go alone. How annoying they are having the wedding... bah!

OP posts:
Purpleartichoke · 30/07/2020 16:00

We did an 10 hour drive with an 11 year old recently. finding restrooms wasn’t as easy as in the past. We ate in our car. It wasn’t awful, but I wouldn’t willingly do it with younger children.

If you can leave the kids at home,I would go solo and probably only attend the ceremony. If things miraculously get better between now and then you could do the reception, but I wouldn’t if it was tomorrow.

MrsKeats · 30/07/2020 16:05

No way would I do this.
Rules could change at any minute as well as the obvious health risks.

JingsMahBucket · 30/07/2020 16:07

@Monkeymilkshake are you sure you can’t fly in somewhere closer then rent a car at that airport to drive the rest of the way?

As for not being able to go alone, maybe all of you go but only you attend the actual wedding and pictures, but skip the reception? That would greatly reduce overall family exposure. I’m sure your husband could find something to do with the kids all day back at the hotel / house. You can spend the other days of your trip with just your nuclear family and gently pushing away your parents to 2m distance.

Original poster
Monkeymilkshake · 30/07/2020 16:13

@Jingsmahbucket there is an airport 4hrs drive away. Might look into that. And good idea about kids and dh staying at hotel. So obvious but didnt think of it! Thanks!

@purpleartichoke i am worried about no service station / having to stay in the car not being able to go for a wonder around when we stop.

OP posts:
Feelingmeh4545 · 30/07/2020 16:14

Just reading that makes me anxious. That's a long journey with two kids in heat etc. Id not be able to push myself to do that at all at the moment. My kids get travel sick 30 minutes up the road. It's alot of effort.

If people choose to get married so far away they shouldn't expect people to travel. Unless she already lives there... But it's still a very long way to go!

letmethinkaboutitfornow · 30/07/2020 16:15

I would go.
Family in tow. Break the journey if necessary, but if you are not shielding and otherwise healthy, I would go and be there for my big sis!

TokyoSushi · 30/07/2020 16:18

If it was anybody else, I'd decline, but for your sister, I think you should make the effort to go.

Although the situation in France is unstable with cases on the rise, so the decision might be taken out of your hands.

ineedaholidaynow · 30/07/2020 16:21

Aren’t there some areas in France now decreasing the number of people who can gather together due to the increase in cases?

noctu · 30/07/2020 16:27

Nope. No way. I'd "develop symptoms and have to self isolate" if you think your family will throw a fit about it.

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