13 year old babysitting sibling for an evening?

[confusedaboutages]

AIBU to leave my 13 year old babysitting my 7 year old? I don't have anyone who can have them that night, so is a straight choice between yes or no.

I'll be 45 minutes away by car. I'm driving not drinking, so can leave immediately if there were any issue. There is a neighbour they could go to if there was a problem I couldn't deal with over the phone.

13 year is used to being home alone and has babysat during the daytime for the 7 year old many times before. 7 year old us nearly 8, if this makes a difference? They get on well, no fighting issues.

I'd be out from 7pm - 11:30pm at the very latest. I'd put the 7 year old to bed before I went out, leaving 13 year old to watch Netflix.

I think it would be fine, but I wanted to check opinions before committing myself.

AIBU to let the 13 year old babysit?

I wouldn't, 45 mins by car is a fair distance.

Can't the neighbour stay and watch the dc?

I think it's fine. I would just chat with the neighbour beforehand to tell them so they can ensure they're in for the evening, just in case.

I did with my eldest 2 at similar ages but only when I was close by - 5-10 mins max. I didn't really go any further away until the older DC was 15.

Not sure I would've been comfortable being so far away in case of emergency

I did this all the time for my siblings, it was fine.

1 wouldn't leave a13 year old that late - we only did early evening until eldest was 15 or got a sitter

At 13 I was in charge of my baby sister but my mum was only 15/20 minutes away.

I probably would leave your older one to babysit when the 7 year old is in bed as you’ve said, but I wouldn’t go so far. 45 minutes away is quite far.

I'm another who would say no, mainly because of the distance. 45 minutes is quite different to 5-10 minutes.

Yes. But I would tell the trusted neighbour I was going so they would be aware.

At 13 I was babysitting other people's children!

At 13 I was babysitting for my nieces most weekends overnight while my sister went out and relived her teen years. I'd have a word with the neighbour and mention that you'll be out, see if they're happy to keep an ear out.

At 12 I was babysitting for several families. It will be fine.

Have they babysat before?

One of my girls regularly babysat from 13, but always started with an hour or so

How likely is your 7yo to play up for their siblings? Siblings are often fine with an outside babysitter, but worse for a sibling (DD could easily managed the 3 kids across the road at 13/14, but her own brother would play her up something chronic!)

You know your kids. If you are worried about it that may suggest it's not the best idea.

I wouldnt have a problem doing this and given the fact that your youngest will be in bed would give me peace of mind...just explain to your neighbour that you will be out incase of an emergency..

I can't imagine leaving a 7 year old with a 13 year old as the babysitter, but maybe that's because my dcs are still so little! I used to babysit for neighbours, but I think I was about 16 by then and found it sometimes hard work. I had to do the whole bedtime routine for 3 dcs though, so actually, maybe that's why I found it hard.

Just to answer a few questions.

7 year old will be in bed.
No fighting/playing up issues, they get on really well.
Neighbour won't babysit per se, but can come over in case if any emergency.

Thanks for replies so far. It's so hard to know where the lines are with teens and a lack of actual guidance as to what is and isn't ok.

It's fine. You know your daughters. I assume you have taught them what to do in any type of emergency and not to open the front door while you are out. If so, then it's fine.

I would never leave children home alone. I used to make my son go to childminder after school until he was 14 years old. I would not leave a child in charge of another child. I would not leave a 13 year old home alone let alone a 7 year old. Madness. Why can't you employ a baby sitter for evening?

I think it depends on your 13yr old, how do they feel about it. By 13 my kids were babysitting regularly for their siblings & for friends /neighbours.

Yeah I was babysitting by 12.

How would you feel if your car broke down and it took hours to get home? 45 mins is a long time in an emergency.

If there was a fire or emergency you would have difficult questions to answer about what was so important they were left home alone.

Can't you take them with you if you can't get a sitter?

Depends on the two children. Is a 13 year old capable of babysitting a 7 year old? Yes.

Is this particular 13 year old capable of controlling that 7 year old? Over to you.

We do this. It's always been fine. Kids love it!

How would you feel if a rhinoceros escaped the zoo and trampled through your house?!?

As long as you aren’t drinking I don’t see the issue, doubly so if you are telling an trusted adult neighbour, unless they are a secret murderer just waiting for you to go out..

I wouldn't do it. 13 is too young, especially that late at night. We get a lot of power cuts, would they panic in complete darkness?