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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Playground etiquette

136 replies

piscis · 20/07/2020 22:20

I have been in a few playgrounds with my DD (3yo) since they opened on 4th July.
First time was a bit strange, didn't know how to act...so when my DD went to play with other kids in the sandpit, I asked the mum who was sat there if that was ok with her (it was fine with me as I wouldn't go to a playground to forbid my DD to play with another kid!) and she said, "of course, it is fine".

After a few more times in playgrounds, it became obvious to me that people going to playgrounds were quite relaxed and assumed that kids play together and are going to mix up and it was not a problem at all. We just play as usual and then clean our hands.

Until today. My DD went near another girl and asked her " what's your name?" And the mum (who was with another mum and kid) say very quickly " only the two of them are playing together". My DD takes rejection quite well actually, and she only asked me why. But only a few minutes after, there was another mum and girl, and after my DD went towards her to start talking to her, her mum quickly told her "move away!" (Not to my DD, but to her own daughter) like she was some kind of leper...

I mean, I know that the advice is still maintaining social distancing but is it realistic for kids so young to do it when going to the playground? Using the equipment in the playground is good but surely one of the most important things for kids is playing together. What's the point of going to the playground if you are not allowed to go near another kid? Doesn't it defy the point ?!

Is it not a bit mean being in the playground and turning away a kid that comes near you? I know people have their own worries and they are even following the guidance but to be honest I find it a bit mean, I wouldn't go to forbid my kid to play with another kid or telling a kid "don't come near Us". I think that if someone is so so worried about catching the virus, it is better not to go, because it is not realistic and kids can take this quite bad (not my DD luckily).

OP posts:

Shopkinsdoll · 21/07/2020 16:19

Never came across this before, thank goodness. Why would you say that? Some people are very weird.

Thislittlelady · 21/07/2020 16:24

If you’re bothered you shouldn’t take your kids if the park is busy. Some people are v scared and won’t have even thought about the impact on behaving like that in front of their own and other peoples kids. You just cannot stop kids being drawn to each other and wanting to play so if the mum really didn’t want to mix maybe she could have chose a quieter time instead of constantly teller her dd to keep away from people.

MessAllOver · 21/07/2020 16:25

@piscis. We're in Wimbledon/Colliers Wood area....

I think 'bubbles lady' was Spanish...go figure! She was very sweet, though. I asked if she minded my son joining in and she looked at me as if I was crazy .

Original poster

piscis · 21/07/2020 16:28

@Harpingon we must live in two different planets 😂😂
Surely you get that in a playground social distance is more than imperfect (to say the least!). I mean, you can stop your child going to join another group but are you telling me in your area the kids are in the climbing frame in a row maintaining the distance?

OP posts:

Harpingon · 21/07/2020 16:34

Piscis I think you will have to accept that not everyone wants to socialize with you ATM. It doesn't mean that people cannot use the park just because you are there and you will not socially distance when asked to. You do not own the equipment and children don't have to play with your daughter. It's a serious disease and people have all sorts of reasons for not wanting contact... If you really don't understand that and won't respect other peoples wishes then YABU.

897654321abcvrufhfgg · 21/07/2020 16:42

Personally I think it’s a parents job to educate their child on social distancing. I have seen it in children as young as 3 in my nursery so it is possible. This is the world we i e in now and you only make life harder for your child, and other children, if you don’t at least try.

MessAllOver · 21/07/2020 16:56

I understand some people have genuine concerns. And if someone asked me to keep my child away, I would do my best to do so (or leave the playground if I couldn't this).

But some of the comments on here suggest some people were socially distancing long before Covid....

Original poster

piscis · 21/07/2020 20:26

@MessAllOver if she was spanish and keeps in close contact with spanish friends/family, I am not so surprised. I am spanish as well. I think things there are a bit much.

Lockdown was hardcore there (kids not allowed to go out even for a walk for 3 months, locked in their houses) and I am told lots of kids wear masks in the playground or walking in the street in Spain, compulsory from 6 years.

If she is in that mindset (I am clarly not), I am not surprised she looked at you that way, probably for her going to the park without a mask seems already a bit crazy.

OP posts:

MessAllOver · 21/07/2020 20:48

@piscis. Sorry I should have been clearer. She said "Of course" as if to say, why are you even asking? She asked how old my son was and told me the same for her granddaughter.

Original poster

piscis · 22/07/2020 12:07

@MessAllOver ah, ok! I got confused because it could be the other way too if she had lots of contact with Spain...

OP posts:

MessAllOver · 22/07/2020 12:13

@piscis. No worries . It was just so lovely to be around friendly people again (although the adults were trying to keep their distance).

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