To ask how much of your income you spend on school fees? And pls tell me its worth it...

[Claliscool]

Not rich by any means.
Decided to send both children to independent school in September due to all sorts of covid and other reasons. The fees are about one third of our household income. Just bricking it slightly.

Also, Redtrees is spouting bs.

We were in a similar situation and we chose to send our two daughters to our local comprehensive but supplement the education it provided with tutors/ extensive extra-curriculars/ summer camps etc. Both daughters did fine academically: the eldest got 9 x grade 9s and an 8 at GCSE and will start an English degree at the top-ranked uni for her subject in September and the youngest is on track to get similar GCSE results. They also are both heavily involves in high-level debating and music. Paying for extras was a fraction of the cost of private education, but meant they aren't disadvantaged in comparison to their privately-educated peers.

Yes, we have very few very wealthy parents for whom fees are an insignificant expense. All are education focussed and prioritise that over lifestyle and trinkets/image. Large bursary budget too.

Why are you doing it 'because of covid'?

We've chosen to save the money to help them on the housing ladder, which will be of far greater benefit than a few posh mates.

@IAmTheBFG Some state secondary schools are very good but some are truly not, so there isn't always that option unfortunately.

These threads always draw posters with snidey comments. Like moths to a flame ..

Yep

Doubletween, I only speak from experience.

We've chosen to save the money to help them on the housing ladder, which will be of far greater benefit than a few posh mates

Yours is a legitimate choice. But there is far more to private schooling than 'a few posh mates'. For one, there are very few truly 'posh' children in private schools! Normal people, doing their best for their children in most cases.

[quote DoubleTweenQueen]@IAmTheBFG Some state secondary schools are very good but some are truly not, so there isn't always that option unfortunately.[/quote]
Yes, I agree. We're very lucky that where we live is in the catchment area of two very good state comprehensives and two okay ones. The quality of the local schools is something we heavily considered when moving to the area we now live in. The OP hasn't said what her local state schools are like, but if they are good then supplementing the education they provide might be an option.

Surely whether the stretch is worth it depends on (a) what your state options are like and (b) what your child is like? There are so many variables...

If state options are good/great and you’re really only focusing on the covid stuff and extra curricular things you could get round that. If state options are generally awful then it’s different.

Similarly depends on the children and what their needs and interests are.

I wouldn’t do it personally in my circumstances but don’t really know what yours are. It’s not as easy as private = better than state.

@RedtreesRedtrees

Doubletween, I only speak from experience.

It’s pretty warped though..What roles have you had in the private sector and how many schools have you worked at?

@RedtreesRedtrees I apologise as the original main part of your comment did not originate from you, but I don't know why you thought it appropriate to repost and agree with a sweeping and generalised statement which is simply wrong, in my experience.

I know many parents for whom if there were good state provision available, the indes would go under. Our inde sector survives, thrives, and is heavily oversubscribed, from KS1& reception (pre-prep) now, as our state sector continues to be squeezed.

FWIW, OP. Closest, 'best' private had 9-3.30 video lessons during COVID close down and local state ranged from one hour a week video lessons to nothing. The parents who sent to private school were eventually seen to be getting their money's worth.

Good job you did your research though excellence can sometimes be a contested concept. That same closest, 'best' private school shared the results of its secondary school entrance exam transparently for the first time and the Y6 parents were generally puzzled to find after 7 years of education from reception to Y6 within that excellent school, the internal cohort did significantly worse than the state external applicants for secondary. Cue lots of justification about statistical anomalies, selective samples of brightest state entrants skewing the sample and so on, plus lots of intangible benefits of school primary education. Cue several families withdrawing their children from progression to secondary and siblings from primary. The primary school teachers said they felt betrayed by the sharing rather than upset by the under-performance which had been clear for years.

If you have an outstanding non private School close by, I would probably edge more towards that given how high a percentage your fees will be taking.

We can afford private but have opted against it as our locksmith primary and secondary is outstanding, and although it out performs our local private school.

I have always taught in the state sector, both in the UK and Au, and DC educated similarly.

If you've got a decent state school, go there and bring in the tutors for any specific areas when it come to the exam years. This is is easier in Au as only the last two years are exam-based (a far better system than in the UK)

However.

I never failed to be amazed and inwardly appalled that all my private tutees come from "independent" schools. WTF are their parents paying for???

Same here - did a lot of private tutoring in London after graduation - every single child was at private school. Some of them the really top selective day schools. Anyone paying to send their child to private school convinced that none of their peers are also having private tuition is v likely to be wrong.

People who send their kids to private schools (the well-to-do middle classes) essentially do so because they want their children to socialise with kids from the same financial and social background. It is a clique mentality.
If you want to do that, private is the wrong way. that effect is best achieved by buying a house next door to the best state primary school around. Will cost you about as much as sending 2 kids private, but you are assured there are only people of the same class and you can boast with sending your kids to a state school!

20% of net income. But we don’t have a mortgage so it is very affordable for us.

We have 13 kids in our class. My friend moved her son from state as he was incredibly bright and got called a weirdo
My kids would have hated a class of only 13 pupils, they would have found this even more boring! They've never been called wierdo. They were the bright ones but didn't make a fuss of it. They socialised just like others did. As they said themselves, they might have been academic, but when it came to other areas, they didn't shine like others did.

Learning to fit in in what constitutes a fair array of normal society is a very valuable skill for adulthood.

And this in itself can be worth the fees. It can open ALOT of doors later on
This a bit of a fallacy though, especially if most are indeed middle class in the same position of becoming friend with the very rich influencial kid. Probably true for the exclusive top private schools but rarely the local more reasonably priced ones.

I went out with a guy who went to a very prestigious private school as did his two sisters. Colossal waste of money for their parents. They literally went on to do nothing. No uni, no well paid career. At near on 50 he's still in ad hoc jobs.

Meanwhile me, state education and put myself through two degrees and professional qualifications and a good career. The parents of my ex literally spent 100's of thousands for their education and the kids went nowhere.

No matter how much you pay you cannot make your child have ambition and drive. That is a soley internal characteristic.

My kids would have hated a class of only 13 pupils, they would have found this even more boring

Well how would you know as they have never been in that position? My dds have never found school boring. I’d say up untill now it’s been a very personal and enriching experience. However dd2 moves up in to year 3 in September and will have a different tutor and class room per subject.

Personally, having worked extensively with young people from both sectors, I think you're totally wasting your money, and it won't be worth it at all. However, it's a personal choice, so if you want to make those sacrifices for negligible benefit, good luck to you.

I'll just extrapolate ad hocs jobs - think of what you did to get you through uni in your 20s. Perfectly fine for a student but really not aspirational at 50.