A little more understanding to those not wearing masks THREAD TWO

[Fuckinellitsme]

Following on from the first thread here

Thank you to all the lovely posters who have shared their experiences on the first thread. It's been incredibly useful in understanding why some people are exempt from wearing a mask on transport, in shops and so on. Particularly in terms of learning about health conditions that aren't widely known, and also the psychological reasons for exemption. Some incredibly brave posters on that thread for whom I am full of admiration.

For those who need them exemption lanyards are available here

Sunflower lanyards can also be picked up for free at several large supermarkets, including Sainsbury's and Asda.

If anyone feels they want/are able to share their reasons for exemption, please do - it may help others to understand why many people can't wear masks, and also (if the last thread is anything to go by) is useful for educating the rest of us on conditions we're not familiar with.

Stay safe all 💐

Well done for starting another and hope this one isn’t derailed. There was a lot of interesting content and I personally learned lots about conditions of never heard of.

Agree. Although nobody should feel they have to explain themselves, being able to do it here, anonymously, give people pause for thought. Reading about posters' very real issues certainly challenges the opinion that everyone not wearing a mask is "at it".

Maybe reading a few of the posts will make people realise that challenging people really isn't on.

@SockYarn

Agree. Although nobody should feel they have to explain themselves, being able to do it here, anonymously, give people pause for thought. Reading about posters' very real issues certainly challenges the opinion that everyone not wearing a mask is "at it".

Maybe reading a few of the posts will make people realise that challenging people really isn't on.

That's what I hope, too.

Perhaps the (admittedly, minority on the other thread) posters who have a 'just suck it up and wear one' attitude might be given pause for thought - I'm not sure how after reading some of the accounts on that thread, anyone could still feel that way.

I would never have expected anyone to ever explain themselves to me nor would I dream of asking. However, I found the other thread eye opening and very sad to hear people sharing their traumatic stories. It’s upsetting to know people feel they might be challenged in public about a deeply personal matter. That should never happen.

Thanks for the new thread OP

Here's a reminder of the Asthma UK advice - that people with asthma are advised to try out some different face coverings, however, although some people with asthma are able to wear a covering, some aren't and that those who aren't are exempt.

Also, a reminder that people can have multiple conditions.

I struggle to wear a mask for more than a few minutes due to:

• asthma
• POTs, a secondary condition of ehlers danlos syndrome which is truly a gift which keeps on giving

I've been debating whether to post and even though it's difficult I've decided I should if it helps people to understand. I was sexually abused between the age of 9 to 15. Part of this involved being gagged and suffocated. I've had therapy over the years and some things don't bring up a response anymore like certain songs or smells. However anything to do with covering my mouth causes me to absolutely freeze in panic.

Unfortunately I work in retail and the company have decided that we should wear masks as we will be asking customers to do so. I'm going to have to have a conversation with my manager about why I can't wear one and just the thought of having to give the reason why is enough to give me flashbacks. As I'm writing this my heart is pounding and I'm shaking. I've already had a customer demanding to know why I wasn't wearing a mask and I know that I will be challenged much more from next Friday. I'm considering leaving my job because of this as I don't know whether I will cope with it.

My reason for exemption is a condition called Trigeminal Neuralgia. It's sometimes referred to as the 'suicide disease'. It can be triggered by even the lightest touch to the face, and often by nothing at all. Common triggers for me include hair brushing, washing/touching/putting make-up on my face, a breeze, cold, getting dressed, cleaning my teeth, dental work, kissing, eating... etc etc! It can go into remission, but never goes away and always gets worse with time, and when it's active I can have thousands of attacks a day. They are so painful I lose consciousness and have been known to have the odd 'accident' which isn't great - thankfully that's only happened at home so far. There is drug therapy available but over time its efficacy decreases and brain surgery is required. I'm a little way away from that yet but it's quite scary knowing it will happen one day - but also in some ways exciting, because surgery means being pain free for several years if it's successful. Unfortunately the symptoms usually return after time.

When I wore a mask last week I had the first full attack I've had in months, and when I tried to put a lighter scarf around my face the same thing happened. I was in bed for most of last week as a result and the attacks are still continuing. I've contacted my local bus company and they've confirmed that TN is a legitimate reason for exemption.

I would love to be able to wear a mask and am so grateful to those who do (I also have rheumatoid arthritis so am higher risk - therefore I honestly appreciate all who can wear masks doing so). A face shield/visor is not suitable either, due to the pressure on my head.

Sorry if you were on the other thread and have seen all this already!

zobalina would one of the visors be something you could possibly wear?

Ds is nearly 11 but won’t be able to wear one, he has a mix of health problems including lung issues for which he is currently having respiratory physio to correct his breathing which is bad enough without a mask.

He is also autistic with serious sensory issues and hates things over his face (quite possibly stemming from illness when he was a baby)

We have tried a couple of things but sadly for him it just won’t work safely.

I must admit before reading various reasons here I am ohms have had no idea that this would be an issue to some. I must say I’m so terribly sorry to those who have had awful experiences.
I wonder if a GP can authorise an individual to not have to wear a mask so they do not have to be given to boses etc? Then a lanyard or similar can be issued so people will recognise there are special circumstances if this is publicised well enough? I would sincerely hope so.

@Janus

I must admit before reading various reasons here I am ohms have had no idea that this would be an issue to some. I must say I’m so terribly sorry to those who have had awful experiences. I wonder if a GP can authorise an individual to not have to wear a mask so they do not have to be given to boses etc? Then a lanyard or similar can be issued so people will recognise there are special circumstances if this is publicised well enough? I would sincerely hope so.

Locally GPs have asked for people not to ask for exception certificates or anything as it’s a self cert thing.

@zobalina77 I am so, so sorry this happened to you. I cannot imagine what you must be going through. You are so incredibly brave for posting - thank you.

Are you in a union? They might be able to speak to your manager for you (with employment law at the forefront of their conversation).

It's so unbelievably awful that you have to have this conversation with them at all. A simple 'I am exempt' should be enough - and indeed is, as the government has stated that no proof of exemption is required.

You will get a lot of support on this thread, I think, judging from the lovely posters on the last one. Keep talking to us if you need to 💐

Locally GPs have asked for people not to ask for exception certificates or anything as it’s a self cert thing

GPs are probably doing a fraction of their usual appointments and they don't have time to do certificates for those who really need them?

I do think alongside this mandatoryness there should be some adverts about hidden disabilities and retail workers should have to watch a short video about them or something.

For employees what about contacting occupational health? The large retailers must have contacts for OH. Agree a visor should be sufficient for staff, you can't keep a mask on for long shifts (and yes I now medical workers do).

I would hope that having read these threads about those who can't wear a mask because of disabilities, that those who are merely whinging "I don't like it" (no kidding, does anyone?) will grow up and wear theirs.

@Janus

I must admit before reading various reasons here I am ohms have had no idea that this would be an issue to some. I must say I’m so terribly sorry to those who have had awful experiences. I wonder if a GP can authorise an individual to not have to wear a mask so they do not have to be given to boses etc? Then a lanyard or similar can be issued so people will recognise there are special circumstances if this is publicised well enough? I would sincerely hope so.

What @Sirzy said is true for GPs generally - they've said that they won't be issuing exemption notes. If they did I suppose the NHS would be swamped! Also the government has said that proof isn't required so those who are exempt are relying on the goodwill of others to take their masklessness at face value.

The hope is that nobody who is exempt will be made to feel uncomfortable or receive abuse or unwanted, personal questions - sadly there will be people who don't wear masks because they don't want to/believe they're muzzles or instruments of New World Order control or whatever. I really, really hope that anyone not wearing a mask will not be immediately lumped together with people like that, and we're given the benefit of the doubt.

Thank you. This week has been so hard, though I knew having to wear masks would eventually come in. I can't wear a visor either as it's still too close to my face.

@zobalina77 I can only imagine how hard it must have been for you. It must have brought things to the fore that you absolutely did not want to be brought to the fore.

Please remember that masks are not mandatory for everyone and you are within your rights to be exempted. Do you have someone (friend/colleague) to support you when you tell your manager you wish to be exempted?

I don't see how a visor would stop an infected person spreading the virus if it's in fine aerosol droplets. I can see they would protect the wearer from larger droplets hitting their face but surely fine aerosol droplets will just flow out of the bottom into the environment.

Just posted this on the old thread, x posting here because I think it's useful -

They won't be listing specific conditions, which is wise because everyone is affected differently and also they would be bound to miss some.

The regulations for public transport are here:

www.legislation.gov.uk/uksi/2020/592/part/3/made

I imagine they will amend these to also cover shops. They say you must wear a face covering unless you have a 'reasonable excuse' and then there is a non-exhaustive list of examples, which is the same as the exemption list on the gov.uk website.

This is similar wording to the lockdown regs - people were only allowed to leave their home if they had a 'reasonable excuse' and the examples in that case were work, shopping for essentials, exercise, medical care, to avoid risk of harm ...

In both sets of regs the list is non-exhaustive - there may be other reasonable excuses that are not on the list.

I see your point Countrygirl but according to the Scottish government, visors are fine as long as they are long enough to cover your mouth (and not one of the golf visor things).

For people who can't wear masks, but could wear a visor, it's better than wearing nothing at all.

@countrygirl99

I don't see how a visor would stop an infected person spreading the virus if it's in fine aerosol droplets. I can see they would protect the wearer from larger droplets hitting their face but surely fine aerosol droplets will just flow out of the bottom into the environment.

Visors seem to be touted as a bit of a magic bullet by those insisting there must be a solution for those who are exempt! But in many cases they're completely unsuitable and yes, don't offer a great deal of protection to others anyway. They're not face coverings as such, in that they don't actually sit flush to the face and any aerosolised matter will simply be propelled out of the sides and bottom.

For many the pressure on the head (or around the neck for the shields worn on shoulders) is unsuitable for all sorts of reasons.

I will certainly take more time and give people benefit of the doubt then. I hope some sort of lanyard or badge worn could maybe make people realise that people have various reasons for not being able to wear a mask.

Thank you @LangClegsInSpace 💐

For people who can't wear masks, but could wear a visor, it's better than wearing nothing at all

I agree with this - if you can, you should, and it is (a bit) better than nothing!

@zobalina77 my heart goes out to you.
I had 16 years of sexual abuse that like you involved being strangled, smothered and suffocated. For the same reasons I’m unable to wear anything close to my face and also work in retail.
I’m dreading having that conversation with my boss.
I’ve ordered a hidden disability lanyard and hope that people won’t have a go at me at work but the thought of working after next Friday is already giving me panic attacks and feeling sick.

Stay strong

@Janus there is a sunflower lanyard scheme aimed at those with hidden disabilities to afford them recognition in supermarkets, public places etc where they may need assistance. It's being extended to situations where a mask is mandatory, but the wearer is exempt. I wore mine on the bus yesterday but sadly nobody seemed to know what it signified - apart from the driver, who was absolutely lovely! If you see someone wearing a sunflower lanyard and no mask, they're exempt.

zobalina and Shadow

As well as raising awareness of hidden disabilities and health issues we definitely need to raise awareness of trauma from sexual abuse. So many women must be affected by this. I've read accounts of 4 women and 1 man now, just over the past couple of days on here. Nobody should have to repeatedly describe what has been done to them just to buy groceries or work their shift.