To think the majority of you are fatphobic?

[Beebee8]

Just that.

I find many things difficult due to the hand I’ve been dealt and my reactions to it due to that hand, and, whilst being overweight isn’t my toxin of choice, believe me, I’m not perfect. Which is why I’m seeking help actively against to be “better”.

I see a lot of vitriol towards other people with a compulsion or compulsive behaviour on here, particularly smoking.

That’s just another addiction, like food can he.

@SparkLee Would you consider Over-eaters anonymous?

Saying over eating is a compulsion just like smoking or drinking or whatever is causing problems isn’t fat shaming. It’s recognising that it’s an issue for a very significant number of people who need help with that.

Just like smoking, or alcoholism or other destructive behaviours.

More help should be available.

emerald perhaps, when my mental health is a better place. Right now I am beyond mortified about my eating problems, and feel to ashamed and embarrassed to seek help 😔

@SparkLee

Beryl you obviously have no idea what it's like to have a compulsive eating disorder (or an alcohol addiction, it would seem), you have no idea what drives people to over eat, which by the way can be classed as a form of self-harm. You've no idea what has happened to them in their lives that has driven them to use food as comfort. No, you just see the 'greed'. Not the self loathing, not the misery, not the fucking failure, just the 'greed' which you have dressed up as faux concern. You don't have a clue about the struggle so perhaps just show a bit of kindness in stead of being so hurtful about issues you don't understand. Fuck, I don't know why I come onto these threads they just end up upsetting me.

SparkLee - for your own mental health maybe it's best not to read threads like this. I'm really sorry for your struggles with food, reading shit like this can only make it worse.

Cathy I couldn't agree more with you, but it's clear that there's plenty of folk here and in RL who don't believe over eating is a compulsion or an addiction, it's just being greedy, lacking will power and the fat person has brought it all on themselves and deserves to be called names.

@SparkLee I feel exactly the same way. Totally get it.

@SparkLee

Cathy I couldn't agree more with you, but it's clear that there's plenty of folk here and in RL who don't believe over eating is a compulsion or an addiction, it's just being greedy, lacking will power and the fat person has brought it all on themselves and deserves to be called names.

Please ignore that rubbish. One day these unkind people may get thyroid problems or depression that needs anti-depressants and they'll see what happens then.

Have you seen the vitriol towards smokers on here? And how there disgusting? Hmmm.

*they’re

It's not abuse. It's awareness. Cautioning.

@CathyTre

Have you seen the vitriol towards smokers on here? And how there disgusting? Hmmm.

Yes, smokers really are fair game on Mumsnet.

There's no such thing as "Emotional smoking", "Being poor", "Being uneducated", "Being stressed", "Comfort smoking due to childhood trauma".

There's none of that. It's just straight out "Smokers are disgusting and should stop immediately".

Last I looked, smoking was pretty hard to quit from what I understand. Gets totally slated on here and called disgusting, filthy😢, habit you chose etc etc.

Obesity? Almost the same health risks. Probably a similar compulsion. Why “better” than smoking?

I don’t know how to quote on here - but yes, Worraliberty. Exactly.

It's addiction like any other and the people who suffer from it don't deserve to be called names and be told they are disgusting either. Why do these threads always turn into fat people vs. Smokers?

OP I agree with you 100% I'm fat (username kind of gives that away!!) but desperately trying to do something about it.

I have PCOS which makes that hard but I'm still trying slowly but surely.

I have 0% self esteem, I hate myself and every 'well meaning' comment, or 'well it doesn't really matter if fat people die of COVID, because frankly they brought it on themselves' comments on here, or the abuse shouted by (usually fat themselves) arseholes in vans or teenagers, just make it harder.

People really don't seem to be able to understand that people a) aren't stupid, the KNOW they are fat, they don't need anyone to tell them b) generally feel pretty shitty about it c) know it is unhealthy and they are at risk if various health conditions d) will most likely be tempted to eat because if the pain and humiliation of all this well meaning smug shit that thin people (particularly on mumsnet) seem to throw around so easily.

Will everyone just fuck off with the well meaning, 'I'm just worried about your health' comments, as it's (very blatantly) just an excuse to be a nasty judgy cunt, and get your mean girl tendencies out on the Internet. I just wish that people would understand that fat does not equal oblivious or stupid.

Frankly if any of you 'fatty bashers' have ever posted any kind of 'be kind' shit on social media you should take a long hard look in the mirror, and I hope you are ashamed of yourselves. If you aren't, then my only wish is that at some point in your life you get to be the subject of the same kind of treatment, so at least you may be able to understand

@Rosiejim I mean tbh I'm pretty bored but nah I'm not gonna fuck off soz. I'll stick around with my inclusive feminism. Including fat and trans women.

@SparkLee

It's addiction like any other and the people who suffer from it don't deserve to be called names and be told they are disgusting either. Why do these threads always turn into fat people vs. Smokers?

It's not 'vs' smokers though is it?

The point CathyTre have raised is that it's not just food addicts who are treated with disgust.

Nicotine addicts are very much treated the same way.

And actually often by people who have previously said they're unhappy with their weight because they're addicted to over eating.

*CathyTre and I

It's awareness @CathyTre. They're just cautioning us.

Personally, I'm grateful when people passively aggressively (in real life) comment on my 'life choices'. I'm even more ecstatic when I come on here for support and some jumped up judgey bitches pointedly explain that I should, and indeed can, do better.

I honestly hadn't realised how easy it was to be their version of perfect.

Anyway, I'm leaving this toxic thread now, and I think there's a few doughnuts left in the fridge.

Sorry if I'm being a bit slow but what does this thread have to do with feminism?

worra I'm aware of the point that's being raised in regard to how smokers are viewed. I'm saying I don't agree with it. I don't think anyone should be shamed into solving their addiction. Why can't people have sympathy for both struggles? Why does it have to be 'well, smokers are treated horribly so fat people should be too'? That is the way your posts are coming across to me. There is enough empathy for more than one problem.

Why are you comparing fat women to males? Fat women are women. No one has said anything to the contrary. Get a grip