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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to see DC after holiday abroad with exH

141 replies

WearyandBleary · 12/07/2020 11:43

ExH is taking teen DC to Spain with his partner and her children in two weeks.

AIBU to want him to self isolate with them for at least a week afterwards? I feel sick at the thought of 200 people in a budget airplane there and back and the associated risks.

He said the two week isolation rule has changed and they are coming back to mine from the airport. I am so stressed!

AIBU to want them to self isolate after the flights?

OP posts:
dogperson05 · 12/07/2020 14:54

In Scotland you would have to isolate on return

Coronabegone · 12/07/2020 14:57

Yes I am not worried about Spain - I am worried about the airport, the plane and the idiots from the Uk that they will be travelling with for hours.

So people doing what they are able and allowed too are idiots? Just because your being ridiculous don't start calling people idiots!

LividLaughLovely · 12/07/2020 15:03

Sick of hearing what people are “allowed” and “entitled” to do. Just because it isn’t illegal doesn’t make it a good idea.

Also sick of hearing “are you getting help with your anxiety?” as a cunty pa catch-all for anybody who isn’t essentially delighted to be out licking strangers.

Rhianna1980 · 12/07/2020 15:05

Remember: The relaxation of travelling and quarantine rules are not necessarily for your own benefit it’s for the benefit of the economy.

Quarantine your child when he/she comes back. Prepare your house, create a space for him/her to make it as safe as possible, for everyone, and tell your child what to expect. It’s for everyone’s benefit.

If they don’t like it, child can stay with the dad.

The virus is not gone yet.

vanillandhoney · 12/07/2020 15:09

@LividLaughLovely

Sick of hearing what people are “allowed” and “entitled” to do. Just because it isn’t illegal doesn’t make it a good idea.

Also sick of hearing “are you getting help with your anxiety?” as a cunty pa catch-all for anybody who isn’t essentially delighted to be out licking strangers.

Well, I'm sick of people being told off and judged for doing things that are perfectly legal to do.
D4rwin · 12/07/2020 15:12

The onus is still on people to be safe and take precautions. Only a cunt sticks to the sport limit "because it's legally allowed" in the middle of the pouring rain.

D4rwin · 12/07/2020 15:12

*speed limit

MzHz · 12/07/2020 15:16

@vanillandhoney

How are they more at risk in the UK than going to Spain

You are more at risk going on holiday here than you are abroad, as the number of cases in the population is higher here.

This absolutely ISNT true

Unless of course you’re going somewhere like Brazil, USA....

Our figures overtook all other eu countries, our infection rate is now hugely lower than it was.

We are not safer in the uk than in Spain for example

Op is ridiculous. Im not sure I even believe tHis thread at all tbh.

MzHz · 12/07/2020 15:18

Well, I'm sick of people being told off and judged for doing things that are perfectly legal to do.

Well said @vanillandhoney, me too.

xolotltezcatlopoca · 12/07/2020 15:20

I think I agree with you, OP. They decided to go abroad, so they should make sure that it won't affect others in worst case scenario. The kids aren't small either. So if you are willing to travel to other countries during pandemic, you should make sure you are not passing/spreading anything to others. So you are not BU at all, OP.

MzHz · 12/07/2020 15:21

The airports demand masks to be worn at all times, ditto the planes.

Air is filtered on board, masks are compulsory in Spain when in public etc

You are safer in the plane than you are in Primark or Tesco.

tillyandmilly · 12/07/2020 15:24

Don’t be so silly! This lady does have reasonable concerns - we are in the middle of a pandemic with flare ups all over the world - don’t get me started on the argument it’s just like flu! We are not 100% sure of the long term issues health wise re.lungs etc I for sure will leave my 2 weeks abroad until next year! Not worth it.

FrangipaniBlue · 12/07/2020 15:26

In the OPs shoes the issue I would have is that IF they developed symptoms on return (having caught it on the plane, because let's face it that's the most likely place!) then I too would have to isolate meaning staying away from work, not being able to shop, see friends, walk the dog etc etc.

It's a big impact on someone else's day to day life that they themselves didn't choose and essentially had no say I !! Pretty selfish of the OPs ex to expect it to be honest.

I'd be telling them all that I have no issue with any of them going, but on returning I expect them to stay at exes for 7 days in case they developed symptoms because I wouldn't want to have to self isolate.

FrangipaniBlue · 12/07/2020 15:28

I should point out that we're planning to continue with our foreign holiday in October if restrictions to that country are lifted, and if any of us get symptoms then we will happily self isolate. But that's my choice to still go knowing the risks - I certainly wouldn't be happy having it enforced on me because of someone else's choices

timeisnotaline · 12/07/2020 15:30

I’d do a plan to quarantine them at home, explain it to them and maybe they Won’t like the sound of it and ask their dad if they can stay.

xolotltezcatlopoca · 12/07/2020 15:30

MzHz, how can you be so sure? Tesco or Primark, they don't spend hours stuck in the same place. And how many people wear masks efficiently?
I have seen the news on my own countries news paper, they hired a aircraft to go to another country in agreement, to send some people back there, on a plane hired by government. They were all in PPE, as well as I assume to be checked before hand that they don't have it.

I think it's up to people to feel it's ok or not. You may think it's silly to worry , but it's nothing wrong with people who worry either.

Ponoka7 · 12/07/2020 15:36

Have posters missed that parts, of Spain are going back into lock down? Since travel started again, the infection rate increased.

Coronabegone · 12/07/2020 15:37

@LividLaughLovely and I'm sick of hearing people who are acting within guidelines being given a hard time!

Sick of all the anxious, can't get on public transport, can't face going out of the house, cant go shopping!

Leaving the rest of us to get the country moving and living if us doing it!

853690525d · 12/07/2020 15:38

The problem is, we won't know if there's a significant level of risk until it's been there for a while. So we can't and shouldn't relax. If you want to stay away from people who have been on a plane, do so. Lots of people were being ridiculed as over cautious in February and they just look sensible now. I don't see how it's any different if it's your children, covid doesn't care.

MzHz · 12/07/2020 15:39

There is a LOT wrong with people who worry to this extent actually.

People don’t wear make out and about here, it’s been deemed as unnecessary and probably now is a case of stable door and horse well bolted

Our rates of infection are higher than many placeS still, and a plane air is cleaned and filtered and all people sitting on it have probably been temp checked, and wearing masks, planes cleaned after every flight, there may be spacing between families etc, not sure on this.

Wearing a mask in any way at all vs not wearing a mask will make a difference

Shops have people milling about, touching things and putting them back

We have to exercise caution but we absolutely must do whatever we can to get things back to as normal as we can as soon as we can. Just having learned the importance of washing hands will have an enormous impact on our flu rates this winter alone, remaining cautious, being sensible without being hysterical is what we need to do now based on the actual facts and not the scaremongering we’ve been spoon fed for months.

MzHz · 12/07/2020 15:39

Make = masks

853690525d · 12/07/2020 15:40

The airports demand masks to be worn at all times, ditto the planes. Air is filtered on board, masks are compulsory in Spain when in public etc. You are safer in the plane than you are in Primark or Tesco.

If you're going to make such sweeping claims, please back them up with some data.

back2good · 12/07/2020 15:42

If dad wants to take them to Spain and back via plane, and cases are escalating again, then he should take them to his house for a week when they return. if they get ill, which hopefully won't happen, he should look after them. Can't see why that's controversial, especially if OP has been left holding the bag doing most of the running for them over the lockdown period and trying to work. He's taking the chance; let him risk needing to be home with them.

PicsInRed · 12/07/2020 15:42

If my kids contracted covid, I would want them with me so that I could look after them - especially if I was in the medical field. Wouldn't want them isolating and at the mercy of the poor judgement of the idiot exh who exposed them in the first place. 🤷‍♀️

MzHz · 12/07/2020 15:43

@853690525d

The airports demand masks to be worn at all times, ditto the planes. Air is filtered on board, masks are compulsory in Spain when in public etc. You are safer in the plane than you are in Primark or Tesco.

If you're going to make such sweeping claims, please back them up with some data.

Oh doo please go and read something other than the DM, hello or whatever

Do your own research!