Is anyone else boycotting Tesco's for giving £80,000 to Mermaids?

[loveyouradvice]

Just that really... I was shocked, especially given all the news coverage there has been about the issues recently. I would have expected them to give it to an uncontroversial charity at the very least - and ideally one that most of their customers would like to support

*Your tone towards detransitioners was dismissive and uncaring.

You sought to excuse the quality of the advice their parents may have received and the clinicians who treated them.

Why?*

My tone certainly was not dismissive. And I sought to excuse mermaids organisations. Not the surgeon performing FGM. You decided to bring that gem into this. I was only ever referring to mermaids and the topic of children transitioning. Why are you derailing into other subjects? Also, why do you think parents are blameless in child abuse?

The NHS guidance states that if a parent suspects their child may have gender dysphoria then they should speak to a GP. So it asks the question, why aren't parents doing this and instead aimlessly pushing their kids to have medical procedues?

Maybe because they've seen an ad in Tescos for a 'wonderful' charity called Mermaids, specifically set up to help them? Why would you battle for a GP appt, (which may be embarrassing if you know the GP well) when you can go to a secretive, 'supportive' organisation who know about it?

@Impatiens

That 'bad parenting' excuse is really not going to stand up in court.

Parents of trans kids can be equally as vulnerable and confused as their children, they need support and advice. Mermaids are just as capable of coercing and persuading them as they are the children.

Then they should follow the NHS guidelines that tells them to speak to their GP.

And I sought to excuse mermaids organisations

So you agree that is what you're doing? Excusing Mermaids of their sinister involvement in transing kids?

Well no, not really, seeing as I have absolutely no idea who is male or female on here, I'm going by the words written in front of me and responding to them
How would I know whether it was females posting?
It's always "you're disagreeing with women!" "MiSOgynY!"
Erm, no actually.

@Impatiens

The NHS guidance states that if a parent suspects their child may have gender dysphoria then they should speak to a GP. So it asks the question, why aren't parents doing this and instead aimlessly pushing their kids to have medical procedues?

Maybe because they've seen an ad in Tescos for a 'wonderful' charity called Mermaids, specifically set up to help them? Why would you battle for a GP appt, (which may be embarrassing if you know the GP well) when you can go to a secretive, 'supportive' organisation who know about it?

Oh so you think being a parent of a transgendered person is embarrassing? Wow. That's an awful thing to say.

Mermaids safeguarding is so poise I can't believe they are still allowed have charitable status

Well no, not really, seeing as I have absolutely no idea who is male or female on here, I'm going by the words written in front of me and responding to them
How would I know whether it was females posting?
It's always "you're disagreeing with women!" "MiSOgynY!"

It's a board specifically for talking about women's rights. I'm making a comparison with you implying that pointing out abuse from (many) trans rights activists is transphobic as it is a generalisation of all trans rights activists.

Then they should follow the NHS guidelines that tells them to speak to their GP

But you support Mermaids don't you? You agree that Tesco should donate to them and that people shouldn't boycott them and shouldn't criticise them? If there's no problem with Mermaids why would there be a problem for a parent to consult them?

Mermaids have promoted themselves all over the place as a haven for confused kids and their parents, they have been donated to by many organisations and were specifically named by Emma Watson as the charity to donate to when she posted her rebuke of JK Rowling.

Such a high profile it would be totally understandable why a parent would go there first for support and information. Trying to dodge that isn't going to get Mermaids off the hook.

Why would you battle for a GP appt, (which may be embarrassing if you know the GP well)

Why would it be embarrassing to take your child to the Dr if you thought they were trans?

Excusing Mermaids of their sinister involvement in transing kids?

Nope, I am saying if a child goes through medical transition, fully supported and agreed by their parents then that is down to the parents who made that decision. Mermaids simply provides information on one side, you can research and gain information from the other side too. If a parent of a child is happy to consent to their child undergoing a life altering procedure without doing any research then that's on them. They caused any future suffering to their kids.

It's a board specifically for talking about women's rights

As someone pointed out earlier, this thread is AIBU.

Oh so you think being a parent of a transgendered person is embarrassing? Wow. That's an awful thing to say.

What a slimy remark. You are the one who has so far referred to transing kids as 'child abuse' and 'bad parenting'. What about the trans people who are perfectly happy with their decision to trans? That's an awful (and transphobic) thing to say about them.

But you support Mermaids don't you? You agree that Tesco should donate to them and that people shouldn't boycott them and shouldn't criticise them? If there's no problem with Mermaids why would there be a problem for a parent to consult them?

I don't have an opinion on them either way, I'm neutral really. But a parent is more than welcome to consult them all they want but why wouldn't a parent also speak to a GP and look into the risks involved in a procedure? That's my point. I don't think a parent should only consult them. Such a life changing thing for their child should require a good amount of research

@Impatiens

Oh so you think being a parent of a transgendered person is embarrassing? Wow. That's an awful thing to say.

What a slimy remark. You are the one who has so far referred to transing kids as 'child abuse' and 'bad parenting'. What about the trans people who are perfectly happy with their decision to trans? That's an awful (and transphobic) thing to say about them.

I referred to FGM as child abuse. Read the thread properly. And yes, if a child is jot mature enough to make a life changing decision but the parent allows it then that is bad parenting.

It's slimy to say being trans is embarrassing.

If there's no problem with Mermaids why would there be a problem for a parent to consult them?

I would like to know the answer to this.

If a parent of a child is happy to consent to their child undergoing a life altering procedure without doing any research then that's on them. They caused any future suffering to their kids.

So you’re agreeing that a parent consulting only Mermaids runs a serious risk of damaging their child?

That is what you’re saying, right?

And presumably you would criticise those parents if they accepted on face value what Mermaids tell them? Because Mermaids certainly say their approach is backed by research.

What a slimy remark

You said it though!!
Why answer the poster with "what about what you said tho?"
Being embarrassed by your child being transgender IS an awful thing to say.

Mermaids simply provides information on one side

I wonder why you're so keen to defend them? Whatever the reason, it's going to be very obvious in court, when former trans children and their parents give evidence of their experience with Mermaids, that their involvement was far deeper than that.

As someone pointed out earlier, this thread is AIBU.

I did, yes. But this specific comment I made that you responded to was about misrepresentation of FWR as transphobic. Do try to keep up.

What about the trans people who are perfectly happy with their decision to trans?

That that's great, I was referring to the children who were not happy with their decision, the ones that were mentioned in the court cases. That's pretty obvious in my posts but I see you are just going to twist my words.

@GreytExpectations

The NHS guidance states that if a parent suspects their child may have gender dysphoria then they should speak to a GP. So it asks the question, why aren't parents doing this and instead aimlessly pushing their kids to have medical procedues?

So parent goes to GP. GP realises this needs specialist support so refers to GIDS.

GIDS has a really long waiting list, CAMHS probably don't want to help, so parent turns to internet.

Up pops mermaids, with their suicide figures, the "rather a son, then a dead daughter" line and the promise of support. However this support becomes about the suicide etc, they can offer a solution, and bam you have a prescription sent from Spain.

And you are still waiting for that first appointment at GIDS.

There are two issues, the wait to be seen and those who are exploiting filling the the gap. Either deal with the wait or have a solid support plan in place whilst they do wait.

I wonder why you're so keen to defend them?

Maybe because I have a different opinion to you. I'm sure that a very difficult concept for you to grasp. Oh and it's not about defending mermaids, it's about blaming the right people.

You are the one who has so far referred to transing kids as 'child abuse'

You're going to have to point to that one, as I've read the thread and that sounds like some epic twisting of greys posts.

And presumably you would criticise those parents if they accepted on face value what Mermaids tell them? Because Mermaids certainly say their approach is backed by research.

And, has been pointed out upthread, are linking to a GP who has been struck off the medical register for wrongly prescribing puberty blockers. So they are not just providing impartial advice and telling parents to ensure they research both sides.

Grey yes, I boycott various products or stores that do not align to my values, so what? This thread is about Tescos, Mermaids and (what I see as) their shameful lack of ethics and care for children.