I just can't

[Notupforit]

I posted a few days ago about not wanting to go to a waterpark for my sister's birthday because I hate my post-baby body. We ended up going and had a nice time - except that I look back at all the photos and I look so disgusting that I just want to cry. I've realised that my breasts are by far the biggest problem. They're huge and saggy and I HATE them. I've attached a picture that my husband (who is also, apparently, the world's most incompetent photographer) took on the day so you can see what I mean. Believe it or not, I actually have a waist underneath the giant sagging balls of fat hanging off my body.
Now my husband has arranged for us to see his best friend and his fiancée tomorrow. She's obviously gorgeous and slim. They're very friendly but every single time we see them, he comments on my weight. He's very into fitness so he's not really even speaking from an aesthetic perspective and he'd say exactly the same thing to men and women so it's nothing perverted or sexual. In the context, he's definitely not being out of line or rude. It just means that I know he'll acknowledge and notice how fat and hideous I look.
I don't want anyone to see me but I can't just never leave the house. I just don't know what to do.

[justkeepmovingon]

Please listen to everyone, read some books or listen to some podcasts or get NLP and change your perception on life.

Right now I'd give anything to be in a swimsuit enjoying life, but I have a chronic illness and I'm post op, I'll get there and I will be free and better.

Sorry but moaning about the size of your beautiful boobs and fab skin and lovely figure just seems so so shallow to me.

Yes I'm grumpy and I'm sorry but please please enjoy your health and breathing and moving and splashing and just really simple simple things in life before you can't and you look back wonder why the hell you worried.

[Studycast]

(That was in response to some posts down thread btw.)

[BigBadVoodooHat]

No one can know for sure how the op is feeling, so why not give her the benefit of the doubt fhs?

To be fair, on an anonymous forum no one can know for sure who the person in the photo is and whether they’re aware that a photo of them in their swimsuit has been posted online for discussion, so 🤷‍♀️

[Longdistance]

Oh, I love your figure. Curves in the right places. Twit a woo 😗

Your dhs friend is a complete dick and needs to fottfsofafsm!

[Jannyapple66]

I looked at your picture and think you look fantastic
You've got a great figure , lovely curves
Great skin and fab boobs
Just need a good bra , who can carry off a saggy soggy swimsuit ?
Totally heterosexual woman here lol
Be kind to yourself

[averysuitablegirl]

Haven't read the whole thread, but the only possible problem that I can see in the photo that you posed is the swimming costume.

If you're feel self-conscious about your breasts, try something with more support and shape.

I've got much, much smaller breasts that you and post-three babies and the wrong side of 50, I definitely feel much better in something more structured.

Good swimming costumes are £££ but so worth it.

[weathervane1]

To be honest you are very fanciable and with a sexy figure x

[drumandthebass]

You look lovely, but I agree with others in that you need a swimsuit to support those fabulous breasts.

I hate my body with a passion and totally understand how you feel, ,but you really do look lovely

[averysuitablegirl]

www.bravissimo.com/products/corfu-swimsuit-sw641/#red-sw641red

Something like this.

[SoozKunt]

You just need to lose weight all over and get a more flattering/supportive swimsuit.

[HappyStep1]

SoozKunt - WTAF?

[Sharkerr]

I felt quite irritated reading your OP, as it seemed pretty blatantly obvious you are well aware you look fantastic and are just fishing for compliments.

If I’m wrong on that one, then my response will presumably tell you a lot about how this complete stranger sees you in that photo. Stunning.

[BumbleBeee69]

OP your figure is lovely.. really lovely..

your husbands friend is a horrible Prick and I wouldn't be entertaining meeting up with him...

[FFSFFSFFS]

Speedo do some FANTASTIC bathers that don't have underwire but have a really supportive top part that holds everything up and in and is really comfy.

Once you've got your boobs all snuggled and supported you'll feel much better!

[DollyDaydream70]

I'm 50 yrs old and starved myself thin in my 20's and 30's. I look back now and see how much time I wasted by obsessing about my body. Everything suffered because of my obsession as I would often feel weak and have no energy for anything.
I know you don't see it now but you have a gorgeous figure, and that body did a miraculous thing, it gave birth! Your body looks fit and healthy, and many women would love to have your big boobs (I have pancakes, made slightly larger by the fact that I am now fat and fifty LOL). I'm so glad the mumsnetters have supported you here, they really aren't a bad bunch are they?

[Karenista]

You look incredible. I know that might not help the way you feel. But I’d love to look like you.

[Fluffycloudland77]

That swimsuit isn’t doing you any favours is it?. Do try bravissimo again, if the underwire sticks in it’s just the wrong shape wire.

I need quite wide ones that start right in my underarm, anything narrower and it’s so sore.

[DollyDaydream70]

@HappyStep1 The clue is in @SoozKunt 's name.........

[LemonadeAndDaisyChains]

I think it’s your self image you need to work at. Not your body

This! You look great, and who gives a fuck what your husband's friend thinks, anyway - he sounds like an utter knob!
Ignore him.

[sunflowersandtulips50]

You mention you were an athlete previously so were used to discussing weight etc....you say your friend hasnt changed, that would be right as he hasnt had to carry a baby for 9mths and give birth. Dont be so hard om yourself, I was regularly told I looked great after having my DC, I didnt care what others said as I wasnt happy with the way I looked, I was used to being slim. You stay strong, go out and just remind the person that you have had a baby

[HappyStep1]

@DollyDaydream70 exactly

[BigBadVoodooHat]

SoozKunt - WTAF?

Anyone happy to post a photo of their ‘disgusting body’ in a swimming costume on AIBU, which is hardly renowned for its ‘kid gloves’ approach, is presumably hardy enough to bear the occasional response that isn’t quite so ‘OMG, you’re so gorgeous and I’d kill for your fabulous norks’

[NoSauce]

The costume does nothing for your figure OP. Get something with support.

[ladykuga]

Oh please. When you said saggy I thought I'd be looking at three belly buttons! . That's quite an impressive pair if I may say so. Rock on!

[MadCatLady71]

I’m really, really curious - can you give an example of the kind of thing a person can say that involves commenting on ones weight “without being out of line or rude”?