To think a naughty corner for an 18 month old is a liitle on the harsh side?

[nurseyemma]

My BF from Uni came to stay with us for the We with her DH and !* month old son. She's into GF and discilpline and I suppose I can be a bit "lax" at times but my dd is only 1!

Her 18 month old ds was regularly put in the naughty corner for minor misdemeanours such as not putting his hoodie on!!!?!

Is she right? Is my dd going to have conduct disorder cos I prefer to "choose my battles" for what I consider more serious stuff?!

I take DD2 and put her on a living room chair for biting, hitting or pulling hair more to get her off DD1 than a punishment, she won't stay there but it's enough of a distraction. Sorry shes 20 months, I think if you overuse the naughty step/corner/chair it loses it effectiveness. DD1 will hit DD2 say sorry then put herself in the naughty corner!!!

not that hard to make most 16 month olds sit down for 1 minute on a "timeout"/"naughty" step . IME by that sort of age they do have a decent understanding of what's going on around them (many are starting to talk by that age and IME talking and understanding are pretty closely linked).

It'll all level when they go to school. They come home and nform you of the rules then and they all have the SAME rules.

JESUS! No, she is wrong, you are rigjht. She is going to haev a poor neurotic little thing who screeches a lot. You are going to have a lovely little thing who is as chilled out as his mum. What a loon. I cannot cannot understand that style of parnenting - so stressful the constat rules and regulations and telling off and blah and blah. boring and stresful and no way.

Oh blardy hell, is the world mad?

PUNISH such a young child who does not even know yet right from wrong properly? I might be lax with my youngest. I dont punish, I explain. He is never really naughty on purpose, I dont think kids that young understand why sit still and what they did wrong. If they did something wrong.

Control freaky, yes I agree.

PS amd Starry, i totally agree with you, i can't be doing with parenting fads, cc, naughty step - how can such prescriptive punishments work for every child. I think that is waaay to young. When a child is older and can comprehend why they have been put there, and not have to sit there feeling isolated and abandoned (of course it will stop the "inappropriate" behaviour).

Queen of quotes, you are wrong about talking and understanding. The understanding is there long before the talking. My DD has speech delay although this is righting itself now, there is NOTHING whatsoever wrong with her understanding and she has understood all what is said to her for a long time.

My dd is going through an aggressive stage, i counter this by making her see that this behaviour makes me unhappy, she is usually contrite and concerned and offers a "duddle". I also tell her that her doggie wont be her friend if she is rough with him, hits the mark every time, of course then the poor mut has to suffer the duddle too

If it works for your child, great, but i'll not be using it for mine. I find it a little too contrived and rigid, not adaptable enough. But hey, im about an omega when it comes to parenting so don't take any notice of me.

i should add that, i don't necessarily think it is a harsh punishment, although using it for minor mishaps is ridiculous, its just not something i feel i could implement for my child. So mums who do, please don't think i think its bad parenting, jsut not for me.

naughty step schmaughty step. its just mean amd it sucks. sorry. When mine are naughty I look sad, and walk off and ignore them. I have to sy they are reaally not naughty that often - maybe I have different standards, i definetly don't care if they don't put their hoodie up! I do not engage in silly battles, uneccessary ones. IF its a bit cold and they won't wear a coat, fine. I bring a coat in a bag then when we get outside and it is inevitably freezing i give them it with a big reminder about how mummy is always right. i am you know!

i should add that, i do view it as a harsh punishment, and i am judging you! i am a judgemental cow, i know, but i am telling it like it is!

my 2.10yo is given 'time out' not quite the same as a naughty step, I dont say it is because he is naughty (self-fulling prophecies aren't make believe!) I tell him I'm not happy with what he did and I want him to go and sit on the stairs and think about it, I never really time it, and he comes back to me (sometimes straight away, sometimes ten minutes later) and apologises for whatever he has done wrong, I think the 'time out' is more to give him time to accept what he did is wrong and to realise it needs an apology and not to be repeated. Tbh I very rarely have to do anything like this with him, and am more likely to do the 'bobby, get your coat on, if you haven't got it on by 5 you're not wearing it and you'll get cold' count to 5, then do as i said I was going to. As pcsmum said, they soon realise mummy is always right

I despair (sigh)

You won't draw me to say anything personal / critical but I am thinking it PSCMUM

I take it she wouldn't consider bribing him with chocolate instead then
Im SUCH a bad bad mother

Some people dont adopt parenting styles or set out with definite ways of doing things, they just muddle through as best they can. That friend is obviously not coping imo. Maybe she was like that with him because she was stressed about being away from home and felt selfconscious of his behaviour in someone elses home?

I know a mum who used the naughty step on her 12 MONTH OLD. She made him apologise and give her a kiss afterwards - poor little mite couldn't even say hello, let alone sorry! It was completely ridiculous and made me quite angry at programmes like supernanny because some people do unquestioningly apply what is recommended without really asking themselves why.

DD2 is 2 next week and when she is naughty, like clunking someone on the head with a toy kind of naughty, then i simply say "no" and pick her up and put her in the utility room with the door shut (a glass door).
a minute or so later, i go and let her out, tell her she must play nicely and she usually goes and says sorry (accompanied with a little head rub) and carries on playing.

works well i think.

but for not putting her coat on, well how ridiculous? the minute she's outside she'll want it.