Stopping drinking for a while

[Patbutcherismyhero]

Throughout lockdown I've gradually started drinking more and more. I now usually only have one day off a week. Last night I drank way too much and was sick, slept terribly and today I just feel awful mentally and physically. I need to cut back. It's become far too much far too often.

I hate waking in the night with anxiety and having to check my phone to if I put any shit on social media. I don't usually get hangovers but I always feel tired and lacking in motivation. Alcohol has become such a big part of my life but I know it's not healthy and I really need to stop for a while. Anyone else?

Sorry not to be more supportive to everyone but I am struggling with reception. Well done to @fluckityfluckfluck - you are inspirational. Lots of people roll now probably open up to you about their issues with alcohol.

@AlCalavicci - so sorry about your husband- sounds awful. Thank you for your support

@Poppy209 - well done, that’s brilliant! Thanks to for your support 💗

@Railingsohno ,
It is good to know you are managing to stay AF and that your DH is been supportive.
I know you can not poat much but if you get the chance can you let us know what the AF cider is that you have found , it would be nice if we can get it here.
When you come back try Stowford press AF ctder , I really like it as it is not to sweet .

How is everybody else doing ?
Its been so hot , I could of easily put myself around the out side of a couple of cold pints in a beer garden , but I have been good and stayed dry .

post much , AF cider

I promise I have not had a drink

I've struggled as predicted.... didn't make it out for a walk as was starving when I got in so cooked tea and was then too full and lazy to move. I've eaten a load of crap crisps and chocolate but stuck to af beer. Heading to bed shortly feeling very down. The week ahead looms :(

@AlCalavicci thanks!!! It’s Thatchers AF cider.
drydrinker.com/product/thatchers-alcohol-free-cider/

@fluckityfluckfluck sorry you are feeling low. You are being too hard on yourself - you may have eaten crap but you’ve stayed AF, that’s a huge achievement. Can you try and plan some things to keep you occupied when you’d normally drink? Think of trigger points. Are you into crafts? A lot of people say knitting/sewing is soothing and keeps hands busy. 💗 For me exercise is the key. Are there any DIY projects you can get into?

@fluckityfluckfluck
Dont be so hard on yourself , you are allowed to eat crap esp when you are eating alone. The weather is going to be nice tomorrow , can you take yourself out for picnic somewhere nice .

@Railingsohno , ooh I like thatchers cider , I will have to try their AF one , I have had a nosy around and Salisburys sell it ( the only supermarket I do not have near me ) it is £1.80 per 500ml bottle or their own which is £1,25 per 500ml . And the stowford press is the cheapest I have seen it to at £1 per 330 mls ( tescos its £1.10 or £1.30 depending on offers)

This is Thatchers website, it shouts about it been ZERO 0.0% until you get to the bottom where it says it is (no more than) 0.05 % and while I am ok with that as all the LA drinks I drink are the same % I thought I had hit the jackpot then
www.thatcherscider.co.uk/news/introducing-our-alcohol-free-cider-zero/

I've recruited a friend to go on a long walk/hike with me today. Thanks guys. I'll be okay once I keep busy xx

@fluckityfluckfluck crap food is still not booze! It's still a win. Well done for feeling crap but sticking with it.
Is there any nice things you like doing but find hard with the kids home that you could plan in- maybe download some books, self pampering? Stuff like that? Xx
Well done @AlCalavicci! I'm enjoying my Heineken zero atm, and ice creams. I figure one ice cream is prob less then I'd do daily in booze!
Hows everyone else?

Found a trick that helps, thought I'd share! So lately I'm finding treats help me stay on track - so my app tells me I've saved the same as a fancy yoga Mat that I really want! So I've bought it! And am so excited!!! Would never do that normally.
Have a ring decided upon for 100 days too.... I used to think I "can't" afford it but I've saved it in booze which i would have bought no question or thought so now am buying these treats, not forever but to keep me on track. Thought perhaps it might spur others on too. Now getting excited about what the next big save will bring!

Thanks @NeedAUserNameAllTaken. Yes the money/treat is a good incentive. It's when you look at the amount over a year etc and think of someone offering you that much extra cash a year - it's kind of mind blowing we pay so much to gain weight and feel shit

I've a hot yoga class booked for Tuesday evening and am meeting a friend for tea on Wednesday. Am trying to put myself out there a bit but it's hard after such prolonged social isolation

Morning all - how's everyone doing?

Morning all.
Not going to lie, it's been a shocker of a week for me. Not one AF night - but I will be AF today so maybe I can include Sunday in the week to clock up a paltry 1 AF night! It started off badly with a crazy work schedule and lots of stress and it just carried on through the week. The weekend in particular has been very heavy. I dread to think how many units have been consumed this week.
I have a thick head today. And I feel so so bloated and fat. Caught sight of myself yesterday in a mirror while out and just though...wow. Lockdown has been so bad for me in terms of diet and drinking and I'm really unhappy with myself.
I'm determined to make positive steps in the coming week. I say this everyday Sunday (usually after a weekend on the booze) but I feel more ready for change this week. I don't know if it will be totally AF but it will definitely be a bit cut down on this week.
Well done to everyone else you are all doing fab. @NeedAUserNameAllTaken I love your idea about keeping track of money spent and buying treat that's great motivation. X

Oh @Patbutcherismyhero I really feel for you. Any chance you'd be willing to just say no alcohol before Saturday? Eliminate the will I/won't I from the week and give your mind and body a rest?

@fluckityfluckfluck yes that's what I'm going to aim for. No weeknight drinking. I have a few things planned that include driving so that will eliminate a few nights. I do need a rest.

Pressed post too soon! I think what I'm struggling with is that feeling of 'am I really that bad that I need to deprive myself' and when wine o clock rolls around I tend to think 'no I'm not, sod it and have a drink.'
By bad I mean that it doesn't noticeably impact on my life badly. I can still work and do everything I need to do. Days out with dc, cleaning, shopping, work. The only thing that I'm not doing well is staying thin but I suspect that's down to endless snacking as well as booze!
But deep down I know going over my units weekly isn't good for my health. And without the booze I'd probably be a lot more energised and alert. It's just hard to rationalise that sometimes because you don't necessarily feel like it's a problem.
@fluckityfluckfluck I know you were spurred on by an incident where you were sick after getting drunk with the neighbours. Perhaps I need a lightbulb moment too...

Maybe you don't need to wait until you feel it's that bad Pat. I think the fact that it is making you feel so bad about yourself is enough. If it wasn't an issue you wouldn't have that internal monologue or even think about it.

Or plan a binge and give yourself a killer hangover if that's what you need

Morning all.

Sorry you had a crap week, Patbutcherismyhero. Is there any way you could make sure there is no booze in the house during the week to lessen the temptation?

Mixed week for me. AF Mon-Tues. Drank sensibly Wedns (was aiming not to drink Wedns but failed. I am a full time carer for my DH and he had a very bad day, so I was stressed and so decided that excused me from being AF!), Thurs and Fri. Last night drank most of a bottle of red wine and feel hung over. I did enjoy it, we sat out in the back garden til late as it was hot here, but wish I hadn't had quite so much.

I still think that maybe I would like to just give up. As you say fluckityfluckfluck the will I/won't I gets far too much headspace.

Hello all!
@Patbutcherismyhero I completely understand what you mean, it's gonna sound harsh but I think if we were all morbidly obese and unable to function the next day, that would probably be the kicker to be like 'right, I need a long term full change' but I'd like me, you hover in the middle, it's so easy to think 'nah I'm alright but tomorrow I'll start over'.

I managed AF Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. One glass Thursday. Friday...I'll be blunt. I had 2/3rds bottle of Prosecco and half a bottle of red and ended up being very drunk, although I get a bit uninhibited so my husband enjoyed that bit but honestly yesterday I had such a bad headache, topped with my compete lack of ability to cope in any form of heat, it was a blur of a day. I had two glasses of Prosecco and half a bottle of red wine though. I feel so ashamed.

This week I am aiming for no wine until Friday but then not doing the classic binge on the Friday. The kids are home from their dad Friday so it won't be silly drinking and shinanegans anyway.

@Cherrybakewellll yeah I think you've nailed it there. It's clearly an issue for us or we wouldn't give it so much headspace but when we are able to function you think ah well it's not THAT bad so keep on.l doing it. I've had similar binges this weekend and even though I felt I slept pretty well I still feel drained and tired now. Definitely having some time off now.

@Darcysshirt sorry you have had a stressful week too. Sometimes that buzz just relaxes you after a bad day doesn't it? Unfortunately I have quite the stash in my house. A well stocked wine rack and numerous spirits. But I have to learn to ignore the temptation.

@Patbutcherismyhero you don't have to be 'bad' for boozing to stop, people don't usually wait until they've got lung cancer to stop smoking! Anyone can take a break at any time.

I wanted to give a view as someone who is 70 odd days of zero alcohol and I can honestly say I'm absolutely loving it. I don't want to drink. I look at drinking now like I look at smoking - I can romanticise it, I can like the idea of it, but I know the reality of it would be crap. I used to think a glass of wine helped me when I'd had a tough day but now I realise it did for the first twenty minutes or so and after that it made me morose or ratty, it shortened my evenings, took away my sleep, and made the following day harder. I don't avoid alcohol because I'm being virtuous I avoid it because I see it now for what it is - a con!

I know that sounds a bit evangelical but I just wanted to offer some encouragement. I didn't expect to give it up for this long but I'm really happy without it. I've spent all weekend out in the sun, cycling walking or sat in the garden reading. I'm far more sociable as I've got more time and energy. I'm booking things in on weekends because I don't need to allow recovery time. Instead of losing out I feel I've gained loads and I just wish I'd done this earlier!

@Biscoffscoff I guess what I'm saying is that I'm not at the stage where I want to stop drinking yet, but I feel I should. And then I have this internal debate with myself about why I should? Is it really necessary and so on. It's draining and you're right, I shouldn't wait for things to get worse, I should just stop now.

I hope one day to be in your position of not wanting the booze and enjoying life more without it. Because I can resonate with a lot of what you're saying. The first 20 minutes of that wine buzz is great but a few hours later I'm usually headachey, irritable and pissed off.

That's how I started though - I 'wanted' to stop but in the same way I 'wanted' to diet - I knew it would be good for me, I felt guilty about becoming reliant on it to unwind, I wanted the result, but in reality I didn't want to stop. Because that seemed hard and no fun and an unnecessary deprivation. And I also felt that I didn't need to, because of course we only think of the people who drink more than us, and don't notice the people around us who drink less.

I took a break from it in lockdown when all the pubs were shut thinking that if I could do thirty days then it would 'prove' something, and I wouldn't be missing out too much because there were no parties, weddings etc. At 30 I decided to go for 50 and by 50 I had zero interest in going back to it. The longer I've gone the less it appeals.