To want a cleaner

[HettySunshine]

We have three children, dd aged 6 and b/g twins aged 4. Boy twin is almost definitely on the autism spectrum and is very full on.

I work 4 days a week in a stressful (but enjoyable) job and dh works full time, also in a very intense role. We both really dislike housework.

Now that the twins get their 30 free hours at nursery, and will be starting school in September, we can certainly afford £50ish a month to pay for some help (we are extremely lucky in this respect).

My husband is not happy with the idea of getting a cleaner. He flaps his hands vaguely and says it would be embarrassing, but isn't able to really explain who he would feel embarrassed in front of or indeed how anyone would know if we don't tell them.

Our 'spare' time is full of children, washing, cooking, washing up etc. and things like vacuuming the stairs and properly cleaning the kitchen and bathroom just don't happen.

My family always had a cleaner growing up and DH's didn't, I imagine this probably colours both of our opinions.

I'm not being unreasonable to want to get a cleaner, am I? I'm tired of being stressed every weekend trying to clean while the children go along behind me messing everything up again.

If you can afford it then absolutely not. It will free up your time.

Many things would go from our budget before our cleaner! It really takes the pressure off if they are covering the basics every week

YANBU

However, you're house will be clean but quite possibly still messy. With little kids around you'll still have to tidy up all the time. But it's great to have the big jobs such as bathrooms and floors etc done for you.

*your not you're!

I wouldn't give up my cleaner unless things were dire. Yes we have to tidy up before she comes but the relief of having everything clean at one point is amazing.

Absolutely get a cleaner!
We have one, she does kitchen, bathrooms, changes and washes sheets on all the beds and is really good at hoovering!
We still have to do so much else. One benefit is also that it forces us to tidy once a week

Get a cleaner. I'm really, really missing ours at the moment, even though we're home a lot more right now. Everything is tidier all of the time, and you can just hoover the bad bits knowing that it's going to be done properly every week.

Not unreasonable at all! Hope you can persuade your husband..maybe show him this thread?!
We have one daughter aged 2 who is at nursery 3 days a week when I work. But with us all at home most of the time the endless mess and cleaning is absolutely doing my head in. So am considering getting a cleaner as well. Feel like even if she (or he!) can do even just a thorough clean of the bathroom, floors.qne kitchen each week then that would make a huge difference. I'm finding it impossible to find time to do this on top of the daily chores, tidying up, meal prep etc! Should mention here husband does pull weight but even so just not enough hours in the day...

Agree with PP, I'm so glad the cleaner comes in to do the deep clean of the bathrooms and the kitchen, moves all the furniture to clean under it etc. She does 3 hours a week. What she gets done in the 3 hours would easily take me 6 hours because I'd be juggling DC at the same time.
Just curious, how many hours a month would you get for £50? I'm not in the UK bit curious after seeing your OP.

Absolutely get one. We’ve gone through lockdown without one absolutely kidding ourselves we could get it all done without help. Am so so relieved to have help again.

Dk20, I'm not sure to be honest. I'd imagine we'd need about 2-3 hours a fortnight, so I figured that would work out about £50 a month. I haven't got as far as finding out how much it would actually cost though.

£50 was about as much as we'd be able to spend so if it worked out to be more than that I'd need to rethink.

I am a cleaner, no one wants me back yet. I've some clients telling me I am not allowed to be working!

Op get a cleaner, there is no shame in it. If you find a good one it will make a difference to your life.

Why would this be a question?

You can spend your money on a cleaner, you don't need permission.

I’m fifty one and I’ve had a cleaner since I was twenty four. I didn’t have my daughter till I was twenty eight.

Look for some local cleaners, price willl be between ten and fifteen pounds an hour.

Go for it OP. Don’t feel guilty!! Try to look at it as a win-win-win...

You win by having a cleaner house.
The cleaner wins by having an extra client.
The economy is also helped a little bit with each transaction

So 2 out of those 3 benefits are not even directly for you, thus you are also doing it for others and the greater good! No guilt, just for being so selfless

Get a cleaner! Mine is £80 a month though for 2 hours a week and she is def on the cheap side - hasn't put her hourly rate up in years, we compensate at Christmas

I wouldn't give up my cleaner for anything.. currently working from home so she's not coming but as soon as I'm back at work I'll be begging for her.

We miss our cleaner. We are a messy pair and don't tidy up often. Before this pandemic we had a cleaning firm come once every four weeks. We tidied up for them coming. Over time our home became tidier and cleaner.
I want the cleaners back.

You'll be lucky to get 2-3 hours a fortnight for £50/month, I think. £12-15/hour is what I've paid.

Get a cleaner! I'm disabled and can't clean, dh was spending his day off and weekend cleaning. So now we have 2 fab ladies who come for an hour and a half once a week.

One does the lounge and kitchen and downstairs loo, including steam cleaning all floors while the other does bathroom, our bedroom and en-suite plus hoovering stairs.

When they go it looks amazing, smells clean and scrubbed (they don't use air fresheners etc which our short lived other cleaner did) and I can relax knowing dh can relax too. They don't do teenagers rooms (wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy 🤣) and it's so much easier to keep clean and tidy after it's been done properly!

I get PIP due to my disability and this is what half of it goes on - worth every penny!

You wont get a cleaner 2-3 times a week for 50 quid a month!

I dream about having the money to afford a cleaner
Go for it

If I could afford one, I'd hire one. Absolutely nothing wrong with hiring a cleaner

We have a cleaner, it means neither my husband or I have to do any of the annoying household shit

Your husband is being unreasonable, tell him unless he wants to do it all himself then you're getting a cleaner

You are not 'lucky', you are earning the money, so stop feeling apologetic about it.
I have a cleaner. She gets £12.50 an hour. Two hours won't do much - your cleaner needs to make it worth her while to come to you unless she also does others in your neighbourhood.
As for your husband- unless he wants to pick up the slack then he shouldn't object.