Aibu to think this may have ruined a friendship?

[Barobee]

TL;DR friend’s boyfriend won’t get his car out of my garage and it’s pissing me off.

Longer version: two years ago a good friend asked if her boyfriend could store his car in my garage. It was supposed to be for three months max as he had just exchanged on a house so would be able to store it in his new house’s garage once it had completed.

I said yes as she’s a good friend and I don’t mind being helpful.

Two years on and the fucking car’s still there. I texted at the beginning of June to ask if it could be moved by mid June because I wanted to paint the garage and turn it into a room where DC could hang out a bit. Friend said she would tell him he needed to move his car. Two weeks later, at friend’s suggestion as he had shown no interest in collecting the car, I texted again to ask when he was coming. No joy.

I’ve just texted again today and said if it’s easier can she just give me his number so I can deal with him directly. Now the reply is that she’ll give me his number later because she’s got another child visiting.

At first I was annoyed at him, partly because I sometimes think he treats friend quite badly, but now I’m beginning to think that they are both taking the piss (him more than her) and this is going to impact badly on our friendship. AIBU and what can I do?

Give him a short deadline or have it sold for scrap.

* Newsflash *
The car will still be in your garage next week. It's been there 2 yrs with apathy and is not suddenly going anywhere unless YOU get it out.

And... sorry, but she's not your friend. Friends don't behave like this.

Look into how much it would cost to get the car moved into the road (there are trolleys they can lift the car wheels onto and move it that way, sorry I can't remember what they're called!)
Your local garage might be able to help.
If he doesn't respond in 24 hours, text him and tell him that's what you'll be doing, and that he will be liable for the cost.
Then, if it comes to it, go ahead and do it, report him for a car on the road with no current road tax, and take him to court for the cost of having it moved.
Use text rather than calling him because then you'll have proof of what was said.

I don’t know why you are flopping around wondering if it will ruin a friendship: what about it ruining your kids chances of having a space that YOU either pay a mortgage or rent for?

Have you given him a deadline?

Have you got a realistic plan?

You need to be prepared to carry it through, so getting help to either break the window and get the brake off, or get help to bounce it out.

As for people saying sell or scrap it: can you do that without the log book? I don’t think so. So threaten a realistic plan.

I agree that you need to have a realistic plan which you are going to carry through. Empty threats won’t work. So I would think hard what options do you have and how much it would cost,etc. and how quickly you can organise them and only threaten him with a realistic option.
Give him deadline and stick to it. Don’t answer his calls, answer by txt and keep them polite and short but firm.
Consider this experience as your assertiveness practice.

Just let your plasterer/decorator use it as his ladder / work bench.

Tell him since he broke the window it means you can put it on the road.... he should respond to that and if he doesn’t, you can break the window and put it on the road

Stop asking, tell him. Hi Pisstaker. Plasterer arrives 8am Tuesday. If car not gone by then I’ll get it towed to xxx and you can collect it at your convenience. You’ve had several weeks to sort this so am sure it won’t be a problem. Op

I agree. The friendship is not more important than utilising your family home. If staying friends means you have to have this guy’s bloody car taking up all the space in your garage for years, she can fuck off.

Call again. Be persistent and assertive. You can do this.
They are in the wrong.

"What time TODAY are you collecting your car"

I don't think you should insist. It makes it look like you won't have the guts to take it out.

Unless it's to inform what will happen to the car if not collected.

Just serve him with a Torts (interference with goods) act notice. Job done.

Hi op,she has no respect for you.
Don't try to keep her as a ' friend ' as she is not one.
Take a formal approach with her with a deadline and follow it through.

Has he messaged back? If not, send pp’s message and start TELLING him. Not asking him.

Hi Pisstaker. Plasterer arrives 8am Tuesday. If car not gone by then I’ll get it towed to xxx and you can collect it at your convenience. You’ve had several weeks to sort this so am sure it won’t be a problem.

I'd have it towed to his house, or if I didn't know his address to the "mates" house.
I don't think he has any intentions of coming back for it. He doesn't want it on his drive.
Please stop letting friends take advantage of you OP.
He purposely avoided your call.

Phone again, and use a different phone, so he doesn't know it is you calling.

Do you have his address?

How much does towing usually? Genuine question because I don’t know anyone who’s had to deal with that in several decades. Maybe £100?

Sell it for scrap. Tell him that’s for the rental use of the garage for the past two years.

You’re worried about damaging a friendship but she’s not worried about your kids not being able to have a play space.

Deadline tomorrow or you’re getting someone in.

Good luck and keep us updated!

Pathetic. What on Earth is the payoff to you for choosing to behave like this?

Get a mate to tow car out of your garage and just onto the road, very close to your house no need to tow it far. That way it becomes a dumped vehicle on a public road and will rightly be towed away sooner or later; if there's a SORN declaration it will no longer be valid, no tax or MOT either so on any of these points it'll be treated as an abandoned vehicle. You can easily text your friend to let her know the car is now out of storage and on the road, then it's up to them if they collect it or not. No longer your problem.

I certainly wouldn't use my precious time sending them letters and waiting around again.
It really is necessary to have friendship boundaries. 2 years free storage + dismissing your messages, they're laughing at you.

People who are doormats remember this- what you are asking and expecting is not unreasonable. The thing that the other person has done, IS unreasonable. The situation was brought, unwanted into YOUR life so they have no grounds to be anything BUT apologetic when you finally say 'This is NOT happening any more'. And that covers any situation.

Tell them a scrap merchant is taking it away for scrap, if they really want the car they will come and get it. Stop being soft they are taking advantage of you. Then if they object and want to keep it stipulate they will have to pay storage rates, if none are paid get rid of it. Do it all in an official letter which is signed by you. Keep a copy. It is not a friendship situation they are taking the piss.

Strange theory but You are storing a car that’s clearly been involved in a crime and probably should push it out on road and report it as dumped

Did he insure it? What was he planning to do
If your house burned down/someone nicked it?